What life lesson did you learn the hard way?

Wicked Wahine Wicked Wahine
Any life lesson, not something silly, though they would be funny to mention, in addition to the life lesson!

I don't tend to learn things the hard way, I am mostly receptive to advice and such, so I can learn from others without needing to fall down on my own, so to speak. One of my brothers however, just has to learn the hard way. There is something about his personality (I'm tempted to say arrogance, ha ha ), that makes him resist all input.
07/29/2013
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RonLee RonLee
LOL nearly every time it's the hard way for me.
I don't give up easily, and that can be a problem.
07/29/2013
js250 js250
--Do not trust anyone!!!
--Never show your vulnerability.
--Don't ever assume anything!
--Do not ever depend on anyone else.
--Keep your finances and major purchases in your name only.
--Nothing lasts forever.
--You are only as good as your last failure.
--If it is too good to be true--it is.
--Love is a word never to be used lightly.
--You are the only one you can count on.
--Liars are everywhere.
--People let you down.


And much, much more negative lessons....not many positive ones.
07/29/2013
Wicked Wahine Wicked Wahine
Quote:
Originally posted by js250
--Do not trust anyone!!!
--Never show your vulnerability.
--Don't ever assume anything!
--Do not ever depend on anyone else.
--Keep your finances and major purchases in your name only.
--Nothing lasts forever.
--You are only as ... More
And you learned all of those the hard way? OMG, that is really sad! I suppose you are undoubtedly stronger and tougher for it. I just think it's a shame such a nice person has been burned so much; it makes me kind of sick thinking about it! I bet your daughter (don't know if you have other kids, but you mentioned her once on the forum) got a lot of very valuable advice from you and I hope she took it to heart and didn't have to learn the hard way!

I mostly agree with what you've written, but I have a few caveats. I trust some people to a degree, but no one implicitly. I probably trust them & my sister the most of anyone, but not with everything. I guess I hope there are people with whom I could show vulnerability, depend on, etc. but I have yet to find an all in one person, for that. I don't totally discount it could happen, but I doubt it!
07/29/2013
js250 js250
Quote:
Originally posted by Wicked Wahine
And you learned all of those the hard way? OMG, that is really sad! I suppose you are undoubtedly stronger and tougher for it. I just think it's a shame such a nice person has been burned so much; it makes me kind of sick thinking about it! I bet ... More
Life lessons....that is what I choose to call them. Yes, I learned them the hard way, that is why once burned--I do not ever trust that person again for anything. However, I do believe that there are reasons for everything and that my learning them the hard way has allowed me to help others.

My daughter is wonderful about learning from my mistakes. I have always explained the lessons and background of how I learned what to her--never just said do not...whatever. That way she understands the reason why I have imparted the lesson to her.

And thanks, I appreciate the compliment since I do honestly like people and try to help them avoid some of the pitfalls I dealt with. I think it has made me more compassionate with others and stronger. I just keep a distance and do not let many others in to know me too deeply.
07/30/2013
Wicked Wahine Wicked Wahine
Quote:
Originally posted by js250
Life lessons....that is what I choose to call them. Yes, I learned them the hard way, that is why once burned--I do not ever trust that person again for anything. However, I do believe that there are reasons for everything and that my learning them ... More
I don't blame you in the least for protecting yourself. I'm glad to hear your daughter took your advice to heart, I think it was partly because you were honest and told her why instead of to do such and such. I think the other part is she is smart enough to listen! My mother has always imparted her wisdom to us which I always listened to, some of my siblings, not so much Anyway, she made sure to do this because her parents believed in letting children/young adults sink or swim on their own with no input, even if asked! My mom thinks it's her job to at least mention things she knows, whether we listen is up to us, but why withhold valuable life experience? So I really like that you have a similar outlook about trying to let others, not just family, benefit from what you have experienced so they might avoid some missteps or find comfort in what's happening. I try to do the same. In a way it makes whatever we went through serve a better purpose than just something bad that happened to us, it can help someone else.


PS, In my comment above, I accidentally erased part of what I said, I meant I trust my parents and sister the most, but not even they get trusted with everything.
07/30/2013
LoveBug721 LoveBug721
Quote:
Originally posted by Wicked Wahine
Any life lesson, not something silly, though they would be funny to mention, in addition to the life lesson!

I don't tend to learn things the hard way, I am mostly receptive to advice and such, so I can learn from others without needing to ... More
Stand On Your Own Two Feet
07/30/2013
Ansley Ansley
Life is what you make it. If you insist on carrying around negative energy or negative people in your life, then it stands to reason you'll have a lot of negativity in general. There really is something to the Law of Attraction.
07/31/2013
Wicked Wahine Wicked Wahine
Quote:
Originally posted by Ansley
Life is what you make it. If you insist on carrying around negative energy or negative people in your life, then it stands to reason you'll have a lot of negativity in general. There really is something to the Law of Attraction.
I find the negative people just love hanging with other negative people having a big bitchfest. Now, I admit to liking the occasional ranting bitchfest, but I can't dwell on it either. If I get burned, or can't stand someone's constant negativity, I stop their access to me. You know how they say forgive and forget? Well, I acknowledge (never forget), but move on.

You're right, I think your and js250's comments in my other thread about how much control you had over your life so far, shows that life is what you make of it. You chose to recognize obstacles, deal with them, perhaps adjust course and continue on. That flexibility in the way you view your journey to your goals is a perfect example of what you made of it. A more rigid personality would have derailed and abandoned the goal as impossible. It's all in your approach.
07/31/2013
Chelynn67 Chelynn67
Quote:
Originally posted by Wicked Wahine
Any life lesson, not something silly, though they would be funny to mention, in addition to the life lesson!

I don't tend to learn things the hard way, I am mostly receptive to advice and such, so I can learn from others without needing to ... More
You can't really trust anyone
08/01/2013
Gr8pumpkin Gr8pumpkin
Quote:
Originally posted by Chelynn67
You can't really trust anyone
If you are going through a tough time or break up, do not trust your soon to be ex to play fair, even though you are, CYA.
08/02/2013
Wicked Wahine Wicked Wahine
Quote:
Originally posted by Gr8pumpkin
If you are going through a tough time or break up, do not trust your soon to be ex to play fair, even though you are, CYA.
Yeah, that has to be one of the suckiest lessons learned the hard way, ouch. I guess the hardest part of not trusting people, is that you want to trust a loved one & even when it's ending, you can be blindsided.
08/02/2013
Mwar Mwar
I learned what true unconditional love was when I didn't get it from those who promised it to me.

Now I know what it is and will give it to my children no matter what.
08/07/2013
lalalalove lalalalove
Quote:
Originally posted by Wicked Wahine
Any life lesson, not something silly, though they would be funny to mention, in addition to the life lesson!

I don't tend to learn things the hard way, I am mostly receptive to advice and such, so I can learn from others without needing to ... More
Trust no bitch! Lmao
08/07/2013
lalalalove lalalalove
Quote:
Originally posted by Wicked Wahine
Any life lesson, not something silly, though they would be funny to mention, in addition to the life lesson!

I don't tend to learn things the hard way, I am mostly receptive to advice and such, so I can learn from others without needing to ... More
Realistically, though, I have learned to trust others a little less easily. Take things with a grain of salt.
08/07/2013
babyrock babyrock
there is no such thing as something for nothing... karma will restore the balance sooner or later
08/27/2013
Eugler Eugler
My hard lesson so far was:

never drive when too tired. At least nobody was hurt.
08/27/2013
Bignuf Bignuf
Quote:
Originally posted by Wicked Wahine
Any life lesson, not something silly, though they would be funny to mention, in addition to the life lesson!

I don't tend to learn things the hard way, I am mostly receptive to advice and such, so I can learn from others without needing to ... More
The deal that is too good to be true...is too good to be true.
08/27/2013
Bignuf Bignuf
Quote:
Originally posted by Eugler
My hard lesson so far was:

never drive when too tired. At least nobody was hurt.
Ouch. Glad you were not hurt. Been there, done that. Happens a lot in my business, with the long, stressful hours we work.
08/27/2013
Bignuf Bignuf
Quote:
Originally posted by babyrock
there is no such thing as something for nothing... karma will restore the balance sooner or later
All those "Free Weekend Getaway" and "Free Cruise" offers? They aren't. Ever.
08/27/2013
Bignuf Bignuf
Quote:
Originally posted by lalalalove
Realistically, though, I have learned to trust others a little less easily. Take things with a grain of salt.
Like the fact that none of us ever has won a huge international lotto we didn't enter and there is no one sending us a random, misspelled email from Nigeria who happens to have 12.6 million in US dollars just waiting for us to collect it?
08/27/2013
Bignuf Bignuf
Quote:
Originally posted by Wicked Wahine
Yeah, that has to be one of the suckiest lessons learned the hard way, ouch. I guess the hardest part of not trusting people, is that you want to trust a loved one & even when it's ending, you can be blindsided.
That is the hard one, getting burned by someone who you loved, and who probably really did love you too, at some point. Sorry. Hope it all works out peacefully.
08/27/2013
Total posts: 22
Unique posters: 12