Who are the 3 people with the most influence on you?

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Who are the 3 people with the most influence on you?

Wicked Wahine Wicked Wahine
I posted this topic months ago and am repeating it because few answered and I want to get some new people's answers!

If there are more than three just go ahead and list them, three was an arbitrary number
Mar 1, 5:40 pm
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edeneve edeneve
wow, this is somewhat tough since I don't like to let others get too close. so, I guess I'd have to say
the guy I've been dating
a good friend of about 24 years
a good friend of about 5 years
Mar 1, 6:13 pm
KyotoAngel KyotoAngel
My mother, my boyfriend, and two or three close friends whose advice I value.
Mar 2, 12:41 am
SaucyxGirl SaucyxGirl
My close friend K. I trust her advice above all else. She has a knack for observation and can really give brutally honest advice that has yet to prove wrong.

My close friend T. He will straight out tell me when he thinks I am either dating an idiot or if I should rethink a choice before making it.

My close friend B. He will patiently listen to me and then just as patiently hand out advice or his opinion.

My close friend J. Although we are not related by blood or marriage, he is my brother and like an older brother not only has my back but always has my well being in mind.

These four people combined give me the freedom to be who I am while also grounding me. Our relationships are more than that of friends and verge on family to be honest. These are the four that stood beside me during some of my darkest times and while lending me a helping hand delivered harsh truths mixed with encouragement. The bonds we share go deep and over the many years has weathered the bad with the good only to be stronger. Because of that I will listen to any advice they give.
Mar 2, 2:37 am
Oriental husband and wife Oriental husband and wife
Quote:
Originally posted by Wicked Wahine
I posted this topic months ago and am repeating it because few answered and I want to get some new people's answers!

If there are more than three just go ahead and list them, three was an arbitrary number
I am going to answer with has and had the most influence.

My dad: seeing how he reacted to certain situations. How with nothing, being an penniless immigrant he made something. Passed away few years ago at age 97.

My wife who has made a life for me and our kids.

My first boss when I sold newspapers at age 11. My second boss at a hamburger stand.

Jesus Christ and our Holy Father.
Mar 2, 4:22 pm
edeneve edeneve
ok, WW, your turn now.
Mar 2, 7:30 pm
BlackOrchid BlackOrchid
1. My daughter. When I became pregnant at 21, I didn't know what my purpose in life was. I never felt important or responsible. When it became reality that I was in charge of a human life, and raising her it completely changed my perspective.

2. My adoptive father. Unfortunately, he passed away at the young age of 47. I never got to know him as much as I needed to. He was amazing.

3. It's a tie of very close friends.

Amazing question, WW.
Mar 2, 8:06 pm
Wicked Wahine Wicked Wahine
Quote:
Originally posted by SaucyxGirl
My close friend K. I trust her advice above all else. She has a knack for observation and can really give brutally honest advice that has yet to prove wrong.

My close friend T. He will straight out tell me when he thinks I am either dating ...
What a lovely, well written answer, SaucyxGirl! Ahhh, I miss the days when this was more the norm and I am SO FRICKIN excited to see answers like yours and the others!!

Edeneve, KyotoAngel, OH&W and BlackOrchid, thanks to you as well for answering!! I am glad no one felt they had to stick to 3 if they didn't want to!

Thanks everyone for answering so truthfully and not just blowing this off. I have new-found hope for this place, I must say!!

@ BlackOrchid: I used to ask a ton of these questions for months and followed up on all of them, but I burned out. Now, with all the new people, I am re-doing them, or at least the ones that didn't get many answers. Thanks for the compliment and I hope to see more wonderful, thoughtful answers in the future from you! You can see why I got to know so many people really well when they were always answering these type questions, lol!!
Mar 2, 8:39 pm
Wicked Wahine Wicked Wahine
Quote:
Originally posted by edeneve
ok, WW, your turn now.
Hahaha, yes, my turn! You know, I try not to answer y own discussion until later on, after some responses have come in because I don't want to influence the replies. Anyway, here is my answer

My mother is the single biggest influence in mine and my sibling's lives, no question about that. But I have a specially bond with her due to all the medical troubles I had as a child and indeed, still have. She has been a rock and is the only person who knows all my history and understands about it. She has always been the wise council for her children and as a stay at home mom with 4 kids in three years, she was busy, but we never felt neglected. Much of how I treat people and animals is due to her and her intuitive understanding of interpersonal relationships and understanding people and is uncanny. In fact, I can honestly say NO ONE COMES CLOSE in influencing me nearly as much as she has, (even those who has negatively influenced me, lol)!

I am not saying I don't have people who influence me; I am saying that there is no need to list them as their track record has no way to compare with my mom's 46 years on the job!
Mar 2, 8:52 pm
Wicked Wahine Wicked Wahine
Any more takers? Come on now, I know there have to be some others who could answer!
Mar 26, 1:09 am
edeneve edeneve
Quote:
Originally posted by Wicked Wahine
Hahaha, yes, my turn! You know, I try not to answer y own discussion until later on, after some responses have come in because I don't want to influence the replies. Anyway, here is my answer

My mother is the single biggest influence in ...
wow, that's something I've always wanted since I was a child. you certainly are fortunate. WW. I so wish so many of use have/had a mother like yours sounds.
Mar 26, 1:58 am
Wicked Wahine Wicked Wahine
Quote:
Originally posted by edeneve
wow, that's something I've always wanted since I was a child. you certainly are fortunate. WW. I so wish so many of use have/had a mother like yours sounds.
Aww, thanks, Edeneve!

My mom is a very strong willed personality and while there were certainly things I would have preferred she do differently, she did the best she could given the circumstances (or so she says, lol). My siblings and I are now 46, 45, 44 & 43 (I'm the eldest) and yet, we all still talk to her and seek her advice, especially when things are tough, which I think says a lot. We don't go to my father or each other as our first choice -- it's always her. And as annoying as it can be at times, she's always right, dammit! That was especially annoying when growing up and she was telling us something we didn't want to hear/believe, LOL!

She said her parents were very hands off in the sense that they believed children should make their own mistakes. Well that's all fine and good, yet they never offered advice or guidance, even when asked and that my mom felt was a shame. I agree with her, especially as they would come in afterwards and tell them what they did wrong and then tell them all about the experience they had on the topic, you know, when it was of no help!

I think it is always helpful to share your wisdom with children to help guide them and make good choices, but of course, not remove all their obstacles and fight all their battles. I think it's a real shame not to help your children by sharing your experiences and thoughts in the hopes they can learn from them and make their own decisions with more information. That is what my mom did so wonderfully! She taught us all about people and how they think and act and why they do what they do. She prepared us so that we could make the best decisions possible based on as much life experience as she knew about from herself and others. Knowing how something happened to so and so and what their choices led to is such a basic way of teaching, in fact, that is the reason behind many of the Bible stories! They we teaching through recounting stories.

We were given that insight in an effort not have to learn everything the hard way. Now, I have to say, I never had any trouble accepting these lessons, but my siblings all to some degree or other chafed at the bit, so to speak. One brother in particular is incredibly resistant to learning from others' mistakes and seems to always have to learn the hard way. And my sister, who thinks she's a great judge of character (she's NOT!), always tried to make up her own mind about people to the point that she rejected everything our mom would say about people. Unfortunately for my sister, she has always been proven wrong and Mom proven right all along, LMAO! Now, you'd think that track record would perhaps change how my sister reacts in the future, but of course she is so stubborn, it doesn't ever change, LOL!

I think the biggest tribute to my mom is the fact that whether they realize it or not, all my siblings an I emulate her in how we treat people and interact, as well as in our firm core values. As a simple example, I have noticed through the years that we all are not only rescuers of any animal in need, but that we all "council" people in need and try to help everyone, just like she did/does. I was really surprised to notice my brothers for instance, rescuing animals when they used to bitch about all the cats and having to do this or that chore related to them. I thought for sure they would love being alone when they had the chance, free of the responsibility and expense of having pets. Well, lo and behold, they have both had multiple cats and dogs they have found and saved who they spoil rotten! Seeing this despite their avowals that they couldn't be bothered, really made me feel better about them as decent people and not selfish jerks I didn't recognize, lol.

My mom has even "raised" my father in a sense because, unbeknownst to her upon marrying him, she eventually found out he came from a very dysfunctional and abusive background. The man she married who was easy going and laid back, morphed over time into a controlling, hyper-critical person who, as most people do, reverted to treating his children much like he was raised. The change in my father has been drastic as she at first protected us from him (he never physically hurt us and she curbed any verbal abuse, but when we got older, we noticed how she was playing interference). Over time, my father has come to see the truth in all she has said about how one treats people, especially family and he has changed for the better.

OK, enough gushing, LOL. I wish you had the same type of upbringing in that sense and the close relationship I do with my mom because it's such a gift. I feel sorry for people missing out on it. Although, some people are just not going to get along, even if they are related. And people can seek out similar relationships with other non-family members. It's just difficult to find someone who knows you as well as a mother can.
Mar 26, 2:55 am
CinnamonNights CinnamonNights
I actually don't have many close to me at the moment, as graduating high school kinda dissolved my primary friend base...but I guess that the ones with the most influence on me would be my brother, my boyfriend of 2 years, and my best friend of almost 2 years.

I actually didn't like my brother when I was a little kid, but as I grew and changed as a person with age I've come to love him very much. He's very close to me now, and I've come to learn more about him as he learns about me. He's my primary go to if I need help or advice on new life responsibilities. (Taxes, housing, car repair, ect ect)So he effects a lot of the things I do and of course who I am.

My boyfriend I just love to bits of course even though he lives miles away, and we intend to be together for many years to come. I like to make him happy so If there's something I do that hurts him or bothers him I do my best to try and alter myself. A lot of the changes are for the better of course.

As for my best friend, we live far away from each other too. Never met in person actually. Ended up having a big uhm..."case of mistaken identity?" sort of fiasco due to this. I won't get into it because its personal, but essentially they mislead me about a looot of things for a long time. It actually almost made me wonder if they were really trying to be friends with me. We talked about it. Suprisingly, I've forgiven them and to this day they still seem to be trying to forgive themselves, while still proving to be a loving and trustworthy person. So if they need me I try to be there for them, and by doing so I change a lot of behavior of course. Such as, well they're Agender-- I'm still sorta failing horribly at replacing all their pronouns in my mind, but I'm trying my dangdest! I want them to feel comfortable that I don't mind who they are and they're allowed to be who they are at all times. (Had to go back and change every pronoun in that chunk of text actually. @w@ Unfortunately if I'm writing stuff about them I accidentally auto pilot in the wrong term! Working on changing it still since it's a a year and half of behavior to alter.)

All three people both intentionally and unintentionally mold who I am and spur on my development as a person. I guess while the descriptions of the people are different, the reasons are all the same, but essentially I'm influenced by anyone I care about. If I love someone and they love me back. If they like to have me around as much as I like having them around I do my best to make them happy, support them when they need it, and just try to be a good friend to them. If someone makes me happy somehow I like to try and make them happy too. I think really if you love anyone they'll have some sort of effect on who you are, and vice versa.
Mar 27, 12:01 pm
Wicked Wahine Wicked Wahine
Quote:
Originally posted by CinnamonNights
I actually don't have many close to me at the moment, as graduating high school kinda dissolved my primary friend base...but I guess that the ones with the most influence on me would be my brother, my boyfriend of 2 years, and my best friend of ...
What a lovely, thoughtful answer, thank you, CinnamonNights!!!
Mar 27, 8:50 pm
The-IT-Guy-And-My-Secretary The-IT-Guy-And-My-Secretary
Quote:
Originally posted by Wicked Wahine
I posted this topic months ago and am repeating it because few answered and I want to get some new people's answers!

If there are more than three just go ahead and list them, three was an arbitrary number
My wife, a teacher of mine and a best friend I have had since 14.
Mar 28, 8:36 pm
Castielskitten Castielskitten
My husband, mother in law, my best friend and my step father.
Mar 30, 7:19 pm
js250 js250
The person that has had the longest influence in my life has been Johnny Cash(& June). I remember the songs and messages in them from when I was a child. The feelings, empathy, anger and praise really made an impact on me and I learned about researching and following through with my work for updates when I set out to learn about the person behind the songs. His trials, tribulations, fierce religious faith, drug abuse, understanding for all humans, empathy for the beaten down...etc. really struck me when I realized he was a paradox for so many issues--but he worked his ass off to overcome them and was open about them, hoping to help others avoid his pitfalls. The love shared by him and June was absolutely incredible! They overcame many obstacles and issues because they loved and had faith in each other enough to work through the demons together.....

My husband had/has the strongest and most lasting influence on my life. He was a very strong person with many personal issues and demons. He also had the biggest heart and was loyal to those he cared for. He reigned in my wild side and was in no way intimidated by me. He was my equal in personality strength, sensitivity and temper. He could match me step for step in stubbornness, intelligence, and fun. We had many issues to overcome, some of them pretty deep and damaging to each other. He taught me to be responsible, to temper my wildness with caution, to enjoy every second and to give whatever I do 100%....He made me understand that love and respect can overcome many indominatable circumstances and behaviors and that it is never too late to say you are sorry. He enjoyed my impulsiveness and loved to play as much as I do...my husband has made me who I am today and has taught me the meaning of being a big enough person to apologize, better myself and to LIVE...not exist.
Mar 31, 12:35 pm
Wicked Wahine Wicked Wahine
Quote:
Originally posted by js250
The person that has had the longest influence in my life has been Johnny Cash(& June). I remember the songs and messages in them from when I was a child. The feelings, empathy, anger and praise really made an impact on me and I learned about ...
Oh wow, js250, that made me tear up! What a lovely and beautifully written testament to your relationship!
Mar 31, 1:19 pm
Jodi Nicole Prince Jodi Nicole Prince
Quote:
Originally posted by Wicked Wahine
I posted this topic months ago and am repeating it because few answered and I want to get some new people's answers!

If there are more than three just go ahead and list them, three was an arbitrary number
My husband, children and dad
Mar 31, 1:29 pm
Missy May Missy May
My husband- he is such an amazing man and inspires me to do better in my own life. He provides for our family and is always there when we need him. Like I said above, he influences me to be a better person.

Eric (my oldest son)- Eric is such a smart little boy. Only 2.5 years old and amazes me every day! He is also very strong headed and stubborn. He likes to do things his way and gets upset when told no. Eric influences me to practice patience and to get a hold on my anger issues. He is my light at the end of my tunnel of anger issues.

Ezra (my youngest son)- Ezra is growing up far too fast. At 9 months old he is walking like a champ and talking more and more every day. Ezra inspires me to do better for my family. Looking at him I see new possibilities that I didn't know when Eric was his age. Ezra influences me to want to be a better, tighter knit family.

I hope this all makes sense....
Apr 15, 4:38 pm
Wicked Wahine Wicked Wahine
Quote:
Originally posted by Missy May
My husband- he is such an amazing man and inspires me to do better in my own life. He provides for our family and is always there when we need him. Like I said above, he influences me to be a better person.

Eric (my oldest son)- Eric is such ...
It all made beautiful and perfect sense. I thought those were lovely inspirations to continue to be a better person!Good for you and thanks for taking the time to thoughtfully answer my discussion!

PS, Sorry it took me so long to check back on the answers here; I used to be much faster about those things.
Apr 30, 3:18 am
Total posts: 21
Unique posters: 12