He's usually the Mean Papa. Mr. Authority. But, of course, I need to keep order on my own as well. The kids listen to both of us, I'm usually more gentle (unless you piss me off by doing the same damn thing over and over again) and he's more authoritarian. Sometimes it backfires on him, like when he threatens to ground a kid "For a year." Yeah, no kid believes that.
You have to make promises, not threats with kids. Don't make a punishment YOU can't live with. I know people with a 3 room apartment who try to ground their kids from the TV for weeks. The kids can see and hear the TV from every room. So, that punishment doesn't work for them.
Make consequences livable, but teachable.