a piercing dilemma

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a piercing dilemma

Persephone's Addiction Persephone's Addiction
I'm fairly pierced up - 13 piercings (only 10 of which have hardware in them) - and the past year I've wanted a snakebite. Financial issues kept me from getting the piercings but I now have the money...but I also have a problem. My boyfriend and I have been dating for 7 months and he's not so keen on the idea of me getting more piercings.
I'm the kind of person that loves piercings - I have 13 extra holes in my body for a reason. I LIKE THEM.
Part of the situation is that he's 21 years older than me. The other part of it is that I'm a boot-clad, black-wearing, underground music freak who's been on the fringe her whole life - and he's the kind of guy that wears polo shirts and golfs - he's also a counselor. It's like we're from different planets.
Anyway, his perception of piercings is different than mine. He sees piercings and thinks "what did your daddy do to you?" and I see piercings and think "Is that stainless steel or titanium? what gauge is that? would that go well with my industrials? I wonder if they listen to Imminent Starvation?" lol
He's fine with the piercings I already have but doesn't want me to get more. I wonder if he's just gotten used to my appearance, it's become his new normal but is uncomfortable with change. But I also wonder if his discomfort with the idea of additional piercings stems from the fact that he's sensitive about, or uncomfortable with, the big cultural divide between us and additional piercings makes it harder to ignore. I don't think that we have a problem in our relationship, we have a really strong connection, but this is an issue for me and I know we need to talk about it more (he's at work right now, otherwise, we'd be talking right now!)
Has anybody else had a similar situation? I suppose I'm just fishing for thoughts on the topic.
01/27/2011
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Jul!a Jul!a
I had this problem with my last boyfriend, but the situation was a little different. We're both close in age, just over a year apart. The problem with us was that he wanted the "bad girl" with all the piercings and the tattoos only during sex, and absolutely hated that they were all still in when we had to do anything with his family.

There's unfortunately no real easy answer here. The obvious one would be "it's your body, do with it what you want and if he cared he'd understand, etc, etc" but it's not really that simple.

I'd say sit down and have this talk with him, calmly explain things from your end, and calmly ask for his opinions, because he does have a right to voice them. I can't guarantee a specific outcome here, especially because of the age gap, but I think it's a good place to start.

Good luck
01/27/2011
Xavier7 Xavier7
Quote:
Originally posted by Persephone's Addiction
I'm fairly pierced up - 13 piercings (only 10 of which have hardware in them) - and the past year I've wanted a snakebite. Financial issues kept me from getting the piercings but I now have the money...but I also have a problem. My ...
BTW, you could always do piercings yourself. I always have. I've never been in a piercing studio and I've had just about every piercing you could name, except for my cock.
01/31/2011
Persephone's Addiction Persephone's Addiction
Quote:
Originally posted by Xavier7
BTW, you could always do piercings yourself. I always have. I've never been in a piercing studio and I've had just about every piercing you could name, except for my cock.
I wouldn't attempt symmetrical lip piercings on my own. Besides, I have no experience piercing - I'd rather have somebody who does it for a living do it.

Anyway - the bf and I talked (he was well rested and sexed-up) and he decided that it wasn't as big of a deal as he had thought. After I got the piercings, he decided I was right, they looked good and he was fine with it.
Yay for extra metal!
02/02/2011
Lucidity Lucidity
Quote:
Originally posted by Xavier7
BTW, you could always do piercings yourself. I always have. I've never been in a piercing studio and I've had just about every piercing you could name, except for my cock.
Piercings should be done by a professional with professional, sterilized equipment. I have done many of my own piercings, but I also have a sharps box in my home and the correct one-time-use equipment and I have done it as a profession. I have also gone and paid for over half of my (been pierced over 25 times) piercings.

There's a lot more that can go wrong with a piercing than people think about, that's why we have professional studios. I urge you to be careful.
02/02/2011
Lucidity Lucidity
Quote:
Originally posted by Persephone's Addiction
I wouldn't attempt symmetrical lip piercings on my own. Besides, I have no experience piercing - I'd rather have somebody who does it for a living do it.

Anyway - the bf and I talked (he was well rested and sexed-up) and he decided ...
Glad things worked out. Snake bites are lovely and you should do what makes you happy.
02/02/2011
Total posts: 6
Unique posters: 4