Why do men cheat when they have a good woman at home?

Since I'm in a long distance relationship, I've come to loose much of my sexual gratification that only another person can help bring. At first we decided to be monogamous...but after a while I noticed myself thinking about exs that are somewhat close, looking at close friends, and even looking at Craigslist.

I even had the nerve to make an ad or two. At the last second, I'd always pull back and not do anything. Well I had a friend that was going through the same thing staying the night and he seemed to be getting awfully touchy, and the worst part...I was enjoying it.

Before things got too hot, I went aside and texted my boy what was going on. After a few questions from him he gave permission for me to stray, under certain conditions of course. Though I suppose the monogamous has left the relationship, I was able to at least keep enough wits from cheating.

The moral? I set myself up for hard circumstances, and when faced with a decision for the gratification I've desired for so long, rather than just following them and becoming a cheating statistic, I took the time to discuss. I hope this counts, I consider my boyfriend my girlfriend

Imma say what my psych told me: opinions are like assholes, everyone has them.

And I do not agree that women have 'duties' in a marriage. If a guy wants to marry me, he's gonna know ahead of time that I will NOT do all the cooking and cleaning and be some sort of maid. The chores and such will be split right down the middle. He doesn't like it, he can find someone else; it's his loss, not mine.

men that cheat are losers!

It's beyond me. The guy can even be popular with one of the hottest wives around and yet he STILL has to wonder!
Turns me off having a relationship with a guy. I am leaning more towards girls.
I know, girls can cheat too but for me, I naturally assume a guy will cheat.

I'm not a cheater - I can only have romantic feelings for one person at a time and unless I have feelings, I'm not interested in anything sexual. So I'm very loyal and I EXPECT the same in return!

I'm sorta with what Gary said at the onset. Yup, we are animals with sexual instincts... but the reason I am supporting this is because people have different drives. We have already established that the question is skewed but aside from that, one party may think they are doing what is 'required of them at home' including sex, but the other party may not agree. A person that is continually turned down from sex with their partner is going to start to feel rejected, regardless if the other person feels they are doing what is 'required'. A person with a higher sex drive than the other will feel unsatisfied while the either will not be able to see it at all.

This doesn't have to just be about sex, either. It may be about open communication, intimacy, sharing of chores, etc.,. All the little bits that add up to a relationship. Its easy to say that one person is the faultless victim (and sometimes that may very well be the case!) but you really need to look at the root of the problem before making that call. If you stop caring about your partners need in one regard, you can kinda guess what is going to happen in return.

I also think that if you have the attitude that you are only doing what is 'required' of you, you aren't too happy. And if someone were doing a bare minimum to keep me satisfied, I'd probably not have much investment in the relationship either. I'd sooner speak up and break it off before cheating, but the idea is the same.

To put it in the most basic terms, I would say someone (man OR woman) cheats because they feel they need something they aren't getting. That might not be physical, it could be emotional, intellectual, etc. The "better" answer would probably be telling their partner that something is lacking and trying to find a way to solve the problem within the relationship.