What is a healthy amount of arguing a couple should do?

Contributor: LunaLuthor LunaLuthor
My boyfriend and I seem to argue almost everyday but the fights last 20mins-12hours never a full day. It's easy to forgive each other but is that healthy?
07/12/2012
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Contributor: Peggi Peggi
Well, depends on the type of fights we are talking about.

Are we talking, we can't decide on what we want for dinner so we're gonna insult the other person's dinner idea as to why ours is better, or are we talking screaming at each other over every little thing and complaining about what someone does or says kind of fighting?
07/12/2012
Contributor: LilLostLenore LilLostLenore
Quote:
Originally posted by LunaLuthor
My boyfriend and I seem to argue almost everyday but the fights last 20mins-12hours never a full day. It's easy to forgive each other but is that healthy?
break up with him
07/12/2012
Contributor: Feisty Feisty
i would say that an argument everyday isnt healthy.
07/12/2012
Contributor: indiglo indiglo
I imagine each person is going to give a different answer. For me? Yes, that's too much arguing and stress for me, I would not want to be in a relationship like that.

If you're ok with it, and it works for both of you, then that's fine. I've seen many different kinds of relationships between partners, and lots of kinds of relationships where both partners are totally satisfied - even though it was a kind of relationship I would never want to have. That's the beautiful thing about relationships - you can choose any kind you want, and it doesn't matter what anyone else thinks! If you're happy, then that's what is important. I don't think there is any one "right" or "wrong" kind of relationship between consenting, informed adults.
07/12/2012
Contributor: Beck Beck
Depends on what is going on with the relationship. If you guys have moved in together or started spending more time together; then you are getting to know their quirks and they are bound to do something that irritates you and vice versa. If you are just nit picking at each other about silly things; then that is completely normal! Even screaming and getting made at each other are completely normal. Everyone fights and sometimes you go in patterns where you will fight more often then others. Relationships are hard to make work! And you both have to be willing to make it work or it won't.

Anyhow, my answer is that it depends on what you are arguing about, how bad the fights get, and what changed in your relationship. If they are really bad fights then you should rethink your relationship, but if they are normal fights without violence or signs of violence or any other abuse; your arguments are likely healthy. If something changed in your relationship (Just moved in together, been separated long, lack of sex, spending a lot of time together, or anything along these lines); it's likely just the strain of change. If you are arguing about things that will effect your future or your relationship you should reconsider your relationship.
07/12/2012
Contributor: Mitzuki Mitzuki
Quote:
Originally posted by Beck
Depends on what is going on with the relationship. If you guys have moved in together or started spending more time together; then you are getting to know their quirks and they are bound to do something that irritates you and vice versa. If you are ... more
Couldn't have said it better.
07/13/2012
Contributor: Zombirella Zombirella
I don't think arguing every day sounds like a very healthy relationship. It certainly isn't one that I would be happy in or want to stay in. That just sounds stressful to me!
07/13/2012