Annulment

Contributor: bayosgirl bayosgirl
First of all, sorry in advance if this post is rambling/doesn't make sense. It's nearly 3 am, and for some odd reason I'm still up. Anyway.....I have come to the conclusion that getting married was a big mistake on my part. I thought if a man made a lifelong commitment to me it would be the answer to my emptiness (I have been diagnosed and suffered from clinical depression for years) but being trapped in a marriage with someone I'm not in love with has only ADDED to my problems. Don't get me wrong-I'm not saying I don't care about him. I may even have feelings for him enough that would be considered "love." But one thing's for sure-I'm not happy, and I don't see any light at the end of the tunnel. I know that I am completely responsible for this because I knew going into it that there were several things I didn't like about the relationship, including a couple that can never be changed. I don't want to go into details about what those "things" are, because I've already said too much and I'm sure I'll be berated-as I already have been by my mother-for going ahead with the marriage when it wasn't fair to him OR me. Trust me, I feel guilty enough already. I'm not looking for a pat on the back either, just venting here I guess. I have no one to talk to-my mom is sick of hearing about it, and I have literally no friends-my last friend dropped me a few months ago, over something stupid (not related to my relationship woes.)

So anyway, I am strongly considering filing for annulment. I want to avoid having the D-word (divorce) on my record at all costs. We've only been married since April, and have lived together only a short part of that time. There is also an immigration issue involved with this-I am not able to file for him as I had thought I would be due to the fact that I didn't work/earn enough to file taxes in 2010. (Before anyone jumps the gun, no, it was not a contract marriage, we had/have a legitimate relationship.) So I am thinking I have a pretty good case to file for annulment. Does anyone have experience with this?
11/08/2011
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Contributor: Rossie Rossie
Sorry to hear that the marriage is not working out, there really is no fix to some cultural differences. Discuss your case with a reputable Family Law Lawyer in your area, and have he/she file the annulment for you, making sure the paperwork is done properly.
11/08/2011
Contributor: Chilipepper Chilipepper
I understand where you're coming from as I also married the wrong man for the wrong reasons, etc, and I actually went through with a divorce (it's not as bad as people think - my credit actually improved after I got rid of him).

Like Rossie said, consult with a lawyer who specializes in family law to see what your options are. You may be able to get out of it with little mess.

Then seek counseling for yourself, as it's obvious you're not getting any support from your family. Time to build yourself up into a strong person - now is as good a time as any!
11/08/2011
Contributor: Ansley Ansley
I'm so sorry you are unhappy. Annulments are not easy to get, but it can be done and you'll need a good lawyer to make it happen.


These are the reasons you can use to establish nullity of the marriage:

- Consanguinity (basically, you're blood relatives and didn't know it)
- Insanity precluding ability to consent
- Not intending, when marrying, to remain faithful to the spouse (simulation of consent)
- One partner had been deceived by the other in order to obtain consent, and if the partner had been aware of the truth, would not have consented to marry
- Abduction of a person, with the intent to compel them to marry (known as raptus), constitutes an impediment as long as they remain in the kidnapper's power.
- Failure to adhere to requirements of canon law for marriages, such as clandestinity
- The couple killed the spouse of one of them in order to be free to marry.
- The couple committed adultery.
- The couple were under the influence of alcohol or drugs at the time of the marriage.
11/08/2011
Contributor: Beck Beck
You need a hug!

I hope you start to feel better soon! I am sorry your marriage is not making you happy!
11/08/2011