Originally posted by
Have you ever been cheated on? How did you handle it? Did you break up? How did you let your partner know that you knew whnat was going on? Dis you know the person???
Not that I know of. When I was in HS though Senior year I had a boyfriend who went to another HS. I found out through his email (we were using his computer at his house and I was looking for something else in his email..not snooping) that there was a girl who was interested in him and who was constantly asking him out on dates. He wasn't saying yes but he wasn't exactly forthcoming with her that he was taken either. So I jotted down the girl's email address and wrote her an email asking if she knew he had a girlfriend. It was something along the lines of "If you did not know he has a girlfriend then I am sorry and I will address that with him, but if you did know then why the fuck are you continuing to ask him out on dates???" Turns out she knew but didn't care and he wasn't exactly telling her to back off either so it got kind of dramatic for a while with me going to his HS and leaving her nasty notes on her car and other things I am not very proud of.
Same boyfriend (why I stayed with him I'll never know...) went away to College the next year and this time I was looking at his profile on some college site..I forget what it was called but it was like myspace before myspace...and I saw that some girl was asking him to go out and that he was saying he would but never actually making a time. She again didn't seem to know I existed and I messaged her..that one did NOT know and was pretty apologetic to me. The boyfriend was all "what I didn't DO anything with her!!" but the point was that he wanted to and who knew if he would have had he not been caught.
I did not handle it well and ended up cheating on him rather than just breaking up with him. It was not the right nor the healthy thing to do, and the relationship was making me into a horrible person and so I ended it. Best thing I ever did.
In general though if there is suspicion of cheating I think it needs to be addressed right away in an as calm as possible manner. If the relationship seems to be worth saving and the person seems remorseful I guess it's worth fighting for and trying to make things work. But I think that unless it's the person that you want to spend the rest of your life with it's probably better to just leave it. Doesn't really seem worth it to me, that is a HUGE breach of trust and I think that if people truly love and respect each other they won't cheat. I know that sometimes that's not the case and there are many things that can lead to cheating...and so that's why I say that if it's the person you plan to spend the rest of your life with aside from the cheating issue maybe it's worth fighting for.