How long did it take you to get super frank/comfortable with your partner?

Contributor: lezergirl lezergirl
When you've been with someone for a long time, things can get to a super comfortable level - you start doing those things you never would do on a first date and laugh about it instead of getting super awkward: farting, shitting, being frank about your period. How long did it take you and your partner to get to that point?
Answers (public voting - your screen name will appear in the results):
Within the first week
PussyGalore , Dark Muse , Orion , ninaspinkturtle , GoodMorningSunshine , Airekah , RonLee , Fuck it. , teeny <3 , Kilgorescowboy , froggiemoma , GravyCakes , cburger , tickle me pink , Peggi , t00sl0w , ac0313 , poetprincess , Tuesday , oldhippy , RTC
21  (21%)
Within the first month
Beaners , LicentiouslyYours , Redboxbaby , Persephone Nightmare , lamira , MrRainybowbow , lilly555 , SilverIsis , CS2012 , null
10  (10%)
2-6 months
DeliciousSurprise , Jul!a , BadassFatass , ToyTimeTim , darthkitt3n , zracer , Raggedy Andie , indiglo , moonch1ld , *HisMrs* , Sammi , potstickers , UnknownGirl , Pleasure Piratess , liilii080 , leatherlover , married with children , Persephone's Addiction , northstar , Taylor Von , KikiChrome , sixfootsex , AZNYcouple15 , sexyintexas , Destri , Britt&Daniel , Dyma , sasweetheart89 , bunny love , It's a Hooker! , toxie m , CharlieBrown , dhig , monkeylover621 , Princess-Kayla ♥ , TheSlyFox , Jon S , Lummox , IslandGoddess , The Curious Couple , sausagelover , Anjulie , unfulfilled , LavenderSkies
44  (44%)
6-12 months
Gallowraven , sbon , onehotmomma , Valentinka , That Guy , Curves , Arclight
7  (7%)
1-1.5 years
Kayla , Morganna , KrissyRoro , RedGoddess , SoBlue
5  (5%)
1.5-2 years
Yoda , AU , SexyStuff
3  (3%)
more than 2 years
Airen Wolf , Illusional , hive83 , Gunsmoke , unorthodoxplaid , Cream in the Cupcake , Howells , newfoundlust , Kindred , K101
10  (10%)
Total votes: 100
Poll is closed
01/20/2011
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Contributor: Kayla Kayla
I don't know if I could nail down a specific timeframe, but it was probably right around when we moved in together. beforehand, we were really comfortable, but there was really no reason to be discussing things like a period or anything.
01/20/2011
Contributor: Jul!a Jul!a
When we first dated in high school, it happened within a few months. Since we maintained a close friendship afterwards, it was still pretty instantaneous when we got back together.
01/20/2011
Contributor: sbon sbon
We're just starting to get like that now and we've been together 7 months.
01/20/2011
Contributor: Beaners Beaners
My boyfriend and I just threw everything out there pretty much right from the beginning. That's how I know he's the one I'm meant to be with for a long time.
01/20/2011
Contributor: LicentiouslyYours LicentiouslyYours
I tend to be super-frank about stuff anyway, and with what I do for a living there ends up being more talk about intimate subjects upfront. Plus, if I'm not comfortable with someone right off the bat, it's a pretty big clue we're not going anywhere, and we move on.
01/20/2011
Contributor: darthkitt3n darthkitt3n
It was probably within the first few months for us. Mostly, I just would tell him I was on my period so he wouldn't be upset if I was crabby or expect that we were going to have sex. The only real farting talk we have is about the cat lol.
01/20/2011
Contributor: Not here Not here
I can't vote because none of the answers really apply to me. I like to keep a certain level of mystery.. as far as Josh is concerned girls don't poop or fart, and I've managed to keep him believing that. Josh, on the other hand, is very "frank," if you will in that category, but I don't mind. We're really honest and comfortable with each other, but I just don't want to get to that level of comfort. Call me old fashioned...
01/20/2011
Contributor: Airen Wolf Airen Wolf
Quote:
Originally posted by lezergirl
When you've been with someone for a long time, things can get to a super comfortable level - you start doing those things you never would do on a first date and laugh about it instead of getting super awkward: farting, shitting, being frank about ... more
It took many years to get comfortable with some things around Sigel...with Arch it was easier but I was older and just didn't feel like livin' the lie, ya know?
01/20/2011
Contributor: Illusional Illusional
Oh jeez... we're still not there. LOL.
01/20/2011
Contributor: Morganna Morganna
I'm in between things. I never had too big of a problem talking to him about my period and stuff but we've been together for over two years now and I still don't feel comfortable pooping around him or even where there's a possibility he can hear.

As for why I voted 1 - 1.5 years...there were topics that I couldn't discuss with him at the beginning that I could after that.
01/20/2011
Contributor: Sammi Sammi
It's hard to remember, but I'd say around 2-3 months.
01/20/2011
Contributor: lamira lamira
It was about a month. The first month, I had to act like a decent lady, so not to scare him off. But, he has seen my true colors and is still with me after 4 years.
01/21/2011
Contributor: AU AU
I think it was much different for us. We started as friends in high school. So there wasn't the super-best behavior period some go through. But then as now, neither one of us is the type to be frank about bodily functions in the way some are. He grew up in a family of medical personnel, so he could take that stuff better. But we didn't refer to bodily wastes and stuff for a while. It took something like a year or so to talk about it at all (We didn't even have sex for almost a year!). Over a decade has passed, and we still aren't "frank". It was weird, maybe two years ago when we responded to mild flatulence with a giggle. Even now, I'd like to be graceful with my partner, but a comfort, a sort of lack of vanity happened eventually.

Maybe we're weird. People say we're "cute"?
01/21/2011
Contributor: onehotmomma onehotmomma
I would say it was 6 or 7 months into our relationship when we started living together. I'm just guesstimating
01/21/2011
Contributor: TitsMcScandal TitsMcScandal
I'm pretty frank and open with people. And honestly, because of my... different sexual preferences, I will not date someone who is not kinky. Which leaves me with dating someone who I met online or through my kinky community here in Chicago. Online you can find all my dirty little secrets and if I met them in the community then they would know a lot since I'm very open.

So the openness and frankness, comes with just being with me.

However on the other hand, being comfortable I think comes with time. I think once it goes from casual dating to "seeing each other" is when I make the jump to being comfortable.
01/21/2011
Contributor: PussyGalore PussyGalore
I was a wicked wicked little girl. The day I met him I said, "So, I hear you contribute to the delinquency of minors". He asked me what I wanted and I told him the brand of cigarettes I preferred. When I went to hand him the money he said, "your money is no good here". And the rest is history.
01/21/2011
Contributor: Dark Muse Dark Muse
Within the first week mostly. I ended up getting a really really bad UTI, which kind of FORCED me to be super frank. I was embarrassed but quickly got over it. After that, everything just came pretty naturally.
01/21/2011
Contributor: Gunsmoke Gunsmoke
I voted 2 years - but it was probably more like 5. When we were younger a lot went un-said. We both dislike conflict - so until we can find a non-confrontational way to discuss something, we just hold it in for a while.

It doesn't sound ideal - but we've been very happily married for almost 22 years. For us it's about patience - as much as communications.
01/21/2011
Contributor: liilii080 liilii080
We have always been pretty open about bodily functions and the like but it has taken us longer to reach that deep level of intimacy where you can be open about your unfiltered big bad secret self. It's really nice.
01/21/2011
Contributor: Orion Orion
Well me and the wife met online and talked for over a year before we met in person and when we did oh my it was full out lmao was like we knew one another our whole lives when we finally got to be together. We were both paranoid it would be awkward and yeah it wasn't.
01/21/2011
Contributor: KrissyRoro KrissyRoro
takes me awhile !
01/27/2011
Contributor: northstar northstar
I can talk about periods, but not quite comfortable with toilet habits yet..so maybe over a year? It is a LDR though so if we were living together I think it would be a bit quicker!
01/27/2011
Contributor: GoodMorningSunshine GoodMorningSunshine
That creepy-comfort level is what I base my relationships off of. I'm just generally very frank so I know a person is right for me when they can put up with my raunchiness and give it right back. My boyfriend and I hit it off great as friends first and were on that comfort level from day one. I can't even count how many potentially awkward situations were avoided because we were able to tell each other what was going on up front.
02/07/2011
Contributor: Airekah Airekah
I am always upfront with everyone I decide to be with sexually.
02/07/2011
Contributor: Fuck it. Fuck it.
I'm really frank with everybody. It's a personality flaw.
02/24/2011
Contributor: SexyStuff SexyStuff
It took a long time, pretty much after we were married
02/25/2011
Contributor: zeebot zeebot
Quote:
Originally posted by liilii080
We have always been pretty open about bodily functions and the like but it has taken us longer to reach that deep level of intimacy where you can be open about your unfiltered big bad secret self. It's really nice.
Same here.
02/25/2011
Contributor: sexyintexas sexyintexas
Quote:
Originally posted by lezergirl
When you've been with someone for a long time, things can get to a super comfortable level - you start doing those things you never would do on a first date and laugh about it instead of getting super awkward: farting, shitting, being frank about ... more
About 6 months living together
02/27/2011
Contributor: teeny <3 teeny <3
It was on our 5th date. We were at a bar with his friends. He got so drunk I had to babysit and put him to bed. A few hours later, he jumped out of bed naked, tripped on my shoes and puked vodka on my floor on the way to the bathroom. I heard him apologizing between heaves into the toilet. He was so embarassed I couldn't be mad at him. But it definitely broke down the need for fronts and trying to impress eachother.

(d
02/27/2011