what do you consider cheating?

carebear712 carebear712
carebear712
Related to: 
So as far as marriages or long term relationships, some people think only actual act of SEX with someone other than your partner is cheating. I think cheating can be as simple as texting/emailing/talki ng to another person even if no physical contact is made, the fact that you are talking and planning/intending to hook up/meet up to me is far enough to be cheating. So what do ya'll think?
07/19/2012
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Beck Beck
I think cheating is what we establish it to be in our relationships. So people are completely fine with their SO sexting someone else, but not everyone. Cheating has grounds that should be laid down when you establish your relationship.
07/19/2012
- Kira - - Kira -
I would consider sexting/emailing/talki ng to another person in a sexual way cheating if it hadn't been discussed prior. Pretty much anything sexual with another person that hasn't been discussed as okay in the relationship is cheating in my book. I'm also a real hard ass on cheating.

I agree with Beck though that these things should be laid out in the beginning. Not everyone thinks texting is cheating, so I'm always really up front with people I date that I would consider it cheating if they did that. That way if it happens there's no claiming "I didn't know." Yeah, you did!
07/19/2012
Jenn (aka kissmykitty) Jenn (aka kissmykitty)
To me, cheating is primarily physical, but I think I would be just as hurt, perhaps even more by, an emotional affair. Sexting, or having private conversations that I was not told about, or given access to, would definitely fall under the guidelines of cheating, IMHO.
07/19/2012
hot lil momma hot lil momma
In my opinion, emotional affairs are just as destructive as physical ones
07/20/2012
LostinLife LostinLife
Quote:
Originally posted by carebear712
So as far as marriages or long term relationships, some people think only actual act of SEX with someone other than your partner is cheating. I think cheating can be as simple as texting/emailing/talki ng to another person even if no physical contact ... More
I totally agree with you
07/20/2012
MistressDandelion MistressDandelion
Cheating is anything you'd feel guilt about telling your partner. Anything you feel you have to hide.
07/20/2012
PeachCandy PeachCandy
I definitely agree with MistressDandelion! Anything you feel guilty about telling your partner is pretty much cheating
07/22/2012
ToyGeek ToyGeek
If it involves lying and sneaking, and carries the potential to hurt one or more parties emotionally, it's cheating.
07/22/2012
Zandrock Zandrock
I think cheating is define by the relationship. I think any lying, any mistrust, and desire to do something you partner would not is cheating. Anything that your partner would not approve of. Flirting I find to be harmless because both of us never intend to reciprocate. It is just an act. But anything with intent to have emotional intimacy with another person is cheating.
07/22/2012
thisisadeletedaccount thisisadeletedaccount
Cheating is very relative to individual relationships, but I like MistressDandelion and PeachCandy's shorthand description - anything you'd feel guilty about telling your partner.

I'm in a polyamorous triad relationship, and for us, flirting, kissing, and cuddling with other people is not cheating, but anything that involves below-the-waist naked physical contact or sharing explicit photos/texts with someone outside the triad without directly checking in with one's other two partners about it is cheating. Within the triad, anything goes. Plenty of poly people have dramatically different boundaries than us, though - as I said, it's very relative.
07/22/2012
unfulfilled unfulfilled
Cheating varies from relationship to releationship and what has been discussed prior to the relationship.
07/22/2012
melissapotamus melissapotamus
Quote:
Originally posted by carebear712
So as far as marriages or long term relationships, some people think only actual act of SEX with someone other than your partner is cheating. I think cheating can be as simple as texting/emailing/talki ng to another person even if no physical contact ... More
I would NEVER cheat on my awesome, wonderful boyfriend, he is just so important to me, I never want to hurt him. However,I do text frequently with male friends. I'm not flirting with them. They know or should know i dont like them. The bf is sort of ok with this and says he'll stay no matter what. I have cheated a lot in the past though, I can't say its always a bad thing. But in my case it would be, because I've never been treated like such a queen in my life.
07/22/2012
Rawr4483 Rawr4483
Cheating is anything you would feel guilt about or not want to tell your partner. If you feel you need to hide it, its cheating.
07/23/2012
Crimson Vixen Crimson Vixen
Quote:
Originally posted by - Kira -
I would consider sexting/emailing/talki ng to another person in a sexual way cheating if it hadn't been discussed prior. Pretty much anything sexual with another person that hasn't been discussed as okay in the relationship is cheating in my ... More
I agree with this. Anything that is not explicitly stated as okay that involves sexual things is cheating.
07/26/2012
Lildrummrgurl7 Lildrummrgurl7
When you start hiding things, you're most likely cheating. In my relationship, we don't draw a line and define cheating in a black and white way. There are too many grey areas where someone could still get hurt. I always tell my fiance "If you wouldn't do it when I am home, then don't do it when I'm not home."
07/26/2012
Do emu Do emu
Quote:
Originally posted by hot lil momma
In my opinion, emotional affairs are just as destructive as physical ones
And sometimes even more destructive than physical affairs.
08/21/2012
mpfm mpfm
Quote:
Originally posted by Do emu
And sometimes even more destructive than physical affairs.
I agree with this.
08/21/2012
SavingMyself SavingMyself
For me cheating is anything that one's partner does with a member of the opposite sex(or the same sex if they're into that) that they feel like they have to lie about.
09/24/2012
tami tami
Quote:
Originally posted by carebear712
So as far as marriages or long term relationships, some people think only actual act of SEX with someone other than your partner is cheating. I think cheating can be as simple as texting/emailing/talki ng to another person even if no physical contact ... More
cheating should be established between you and your partner when the relationship is forming...set the boundaries before you get to far into the relationship that someone does something that cannot be forgiven.
11/14/2012
Crimson Vixen Crimson Vixen
Quote:
Originally posted by Lildrummrgurl7
When you start hiding things, you're most likely cheating. In my relationship, we don't draw a line and define cheating in a black and white way. There are too many grey areas where someone could still get hurt. I always tell my fiance ... More
I really agree with this. If you're feeling guilty you definitely need to assess why and if it could be damaging to the relationship.
11/18/2012
Total posts: 21
Unique posters: 20