Would you be a Surrogate mother?

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Would you be a Surrogate mother?

I'm very curious to know is anyone on EF would ever consider being a surrogate mother.

Invited: All users.

Discussion Topics

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xOhxSoxScandalousx xOhxSoxScandalousx
I'm curious as to who on EF would be a Surrogate mother if the opportunity presented itself. Why or why not?
Answers (private voting - your screen name will NOT appear in the results):
Yes I definitely would be a Surrogate mother.
13
No I would not be a Surrogate mother.
54
I have been a Surrogate mother before.
I have never been a Surrogate mother.
37
Total votes: 104 (74 voters)
Poll is closed
04/27/2012
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Beck Beck
I don't think I personally could. Because I would have 10 months to bond with that child and that would make me want to keep it. I don't know anyone I would do this for, so most likely I would not be one.
04/27/2012
Raigne Raigne
I am not interested in carrying a child that is biologically mine. It follows that I wouldn't do it for someone else, either.
04/27/2012
P'Gell P'Gell
I couldn't do it. I tend to fall in love with them when they live in my womb. I admire women who can do this, but I'm not the woman for the job.
04/27/2012
Do emu Do emu
Probably not. I don't plan on having kids so I don't think I'd put my body through that for someone else.
04/27/2012
xOhxSoxScandalousx xOhxSoxScandalousx
Oh I forgot to make one thing clear in my OP. I'm talking about one of two different types of Surrogacy in my polls. Here are the two types:

1. "One form of surrogacy, traditional surrogacy, involves using artificial insemination to impregnate the surrogate mother. This technique is often used when a woman is physically unable to bear children, but she still wants to have children with her partner. In this case, the partner donates sperm, or sperm is secured from a third party if he is infertile as well, and the surrogate mother contributes half of the required genetic material. This type of surrogacy has been around for centuries, although it was not widely discussed until the twentieth century, since some women felt ashamed because they could not bear children."

2. "Modern surrogate arrangements usually involve gestational surrogacy. In gestational surrogacy, the couple commissioning the surrogate mother donate both eggs and sperm. The egg is fertilized in a test tube, and then implanted into the surrogate mother. In this case, the surrogate mother acts almost like an incubator, carrying the child to term for a woman who is unable to do so."

I'm referring to number 2 in my OP. Not 1. Sorry if I caused any confusion.
04/27/2012
Highmaintenancegirl916 Highmaintenancegirl916
Yes I definitely would.
04/27/2012
Geogeo Geogeo
I am terrified of pregnancy and find bellies super gross and have witnessed too many (3) births to want to go through it myself.
04/27/2012
PeaceToTheMiddleEast PeaceToTheMiddleEast
I would not do it I be scared that I would get attached to the baby. I love kids and it would be hard to give the baby away. Also I am at a age that I don't want to have any more kids and am scared of the risk issues at my age.
04/27/2012
Willowe Willowe
No. I have no intention of ever having kids for myself, so I wouldn't go through a pregnancy for someone else. Even if someone close to me asked, I still don't think I would do it.
04/27/2012
BG529 BG529
Quote:
Originally posted by xOhxSoxScandalousx
I'm curious as to who on EF would be a Surrogate mother if the opportunity presented itself. Why or why not?
Expecially if it was for a close friend or family member who could not have childern or whatever and I could I would absloutly help them make that dream come true. I know they'd do the same for me!
04/27/2012
chula101 chula101
I don't think i could do it. Not because i don't think the idea is a great one but more because i am way to controlling and get attached very easily.
04/27/2012
Melan!e Melan!e
Quote:
Originally posted by chula101
I don't think i could do it. Not because i don't think the idea is a great one but more because i am way to controlling and get attached very easily.
I feel the same way.
04/27/2012
Ms. N Ms. N
When I was younger, I did consider it for a friend who was in a 3rd marriage and unable to have a child with that husband, but she decided that the children she had with her first husband were enough.
04/27/2012
Badass Badass
My ovaries and all mucked up, I don't think I would be able to be one...

But, if I were unable to concieve, I might try using a surrogate if adoption were out.
04/27/2012
K101 K101
Quote:
Originally posted by xOhxSoxScandalousx
I'm curious as to who on EF would be a Surrogate mother if the opportunity presented itself. Why or why not?
Well that is a good question and a very hard one. I have been pregnant twice, lost both and am unable to carry a child full term. I supposedly "can't get pregnant," but I think miracles happen so in my mind it's still somewhat possible, but it's very unlikely that I could carry full term--health reasons.

Because of losing my own two, that would make it hard for me to just give up one if I were able to suddenly carry a healthy baby to full term.Say I was able to give someone a baby... Now that we have kids -- not ours biologically, but still ours all the same, and further down the road maybe! If it were a sister or someone I loved that truly wanted a baby.

OK, the more I've thought about it since I began typing my response, I don't think I'd do it! Lol. Sudden change of heart? I don't know. I would at least try to consider it if it were for someone I loved I suppose and if I could still be in my child's life. After losing my own though, if a baby ever miraculously did happen to me, no way I'd give it up.
04/27/2012
xOhxSoxScandalousx xOhxSoxScandalousx
Quote:
Originally posted by K101
Well that is a good question and a very hard one. I have been pregnant twice, lost both and am unable to carry a child full term. I supposedly "can't get pregnant," but I think miracles happen so in my mind it's still somewhat ...
I am so sorry for your loss. I believe in miracles too so never give up hope. I understand why you wouldn't be a Surrogate but it's very nice of you to consider doing it for someone you love.
04/27/2012
spineyogurt spineyogurt
Nope
04/27/2012
pixxie87 pixxie87
maybe
04/27/2012
xilliannax xilliannax
Quote:
Originally posted by xOhxSoxScandalousx
I'm curious as to who on EF would be a Surrogate mother if the opportunity presented itself. Why or why not?
Yes! I'd love to be pregnant again if it wasnt for that horrid little side effect of infant/toddler (kidding! love my babies)
04/27/2012
ginas ginas
Quote:
Originally posted by xOhxSoxScandalousx
I'm curious as to who on EF would be a Surrogate mother if the opportunity presented itself. Why or why not?
I would, it pays well
04/27/2012
ksparkles16 ksparkles16
I think it's an amazing thing that some women can do this...but I can't imagine having a baby inside me fore 9 months and then having to see it go. Even though it isn't biologically yours, it's lived in you like your own child. That would be too hard for me
04/28/2012
bobomomo bobomomo
Don't really think so. Its a lot to get into.
04/28/2012
ghalik ghalik
I'll be succinct: Helllllll no.
04/28/2012
sexxxkitten sexxxkitten
I don't think I could be one.
04/28/2012
bayosgirl bayosgirl
No way-I want my own baby, not anyone else's
04/28/2012
Chirple Chirple
I couldn't give up nine months of my life with all the side-effects unless I really loved the person in need - so, yeah, probably not.

Or unless I was paid obscene amounts of money and didn't have to work, I'd consider it.
04/28/2012
unfulfilled unfulfilled
I don't know if I could do it. When I was working in the health food industry, I had a person that came into my store and she was a surrugate.
04/28/2012
CindyH CindyH
no way
04/28/2012
Ansley Ansley
I have very controversial views on surrogacy, IVF and other methods of conceiving children through science. I would never be a surrogate for someone based on the fact that I have no desire to experience full-term pregnancy and all of the things that go with it.

I understand some women have such an intensely burning desire to be bio-mothers to their children that they'll go through anything to achieve it, but I can't help but think about all of the children all over the world aching and yearning for a loving home.
04/28/2012
Love Obsessed Love Obsessed
No I wouldn't be a surrogate Mother.
04/28/2012
xOhxSoxScandalousx xOhxSoxScandalousx
Quote:
Originally posted by Ansley
I have very controversial views on surrogacy, IVF and other methods of conceiving children through science. I would never be a surrogate for someone based on the fact that I have no desire to experience full-term pregnancy and all of the things that ...
The problem with adoption is that it is a super long process and is very expensive. I would love to adopt later in the future.
04/28/2012
Gunsmoke Gunsmoke
My daughter's boyfriend's mother is a surrogacy attorney - all I can say is there must be a lot of money in it - she does very well cash-wise.
04/29/2012
Ansley Ansley
Quote:
Originally posted by xOhxSoxScandalousx
The problem with adoption is that it is a super long process and is very expensive. I would love to adopt later in the future.
This is true, but there are ways around it. (But, as I said my views are quite controversial on the matter so... )
04/29/2012
Tuesday Tuesday
I love the idea of doing it. In reality, I know I would have too difficult a time giving the baby away. I don't think I could do it. I felt like I bonded with my son the instant I knew he was in there.
04/29/2012
Sinfully Sinfully
Nope.
04/29/2012
SouthernBelle SouthernBelle
I would love to say that I would be a surrogate mother, because I know that is a route so many people would love to take... unfortunately, I think I would be too attached to the baby to give it up for adoption. I can only imagine it if I were carrying for someone I'm close to and would still be able to see the child, as its surrogate. I'm all for open "families" like that.
05/07/2012
silverdragonfly9 silverdragonfly9
Depending who it was for especially after having my lil girl and watching her grow I would defiantly be willing to help someone in my life who couldn't carry a child
05/23/2012
breebree breebree
for family i would def do it... and for a couple i didn't know i would still do it but for the right price.
05/24/2012
sweetiejo sweetiejo
I would do it for my family hands down, mainly since I will probably need one eventually. If it were for another couple I don't think I could.
05/24/2012
Mistress Sassy Mistress Sassy
I don't really think I could handle being a surrogate mother and going through all that time carrying a baby only to give it up later, even if it wasn't my child to have. I know myself well enough that when I do have kids I will probably bond very deeply/tightly to my own children, so.. I think it'd be unwise for me to be a surrogate to anyone. I'd be far too attached. :c
05/24/2012
*Camoprincess* *Camoprincess*
I wouldn't be able to considering I am having a hard enough time getting pregnant myself
05/29/2012
babycakess babycakess
I would if I could.

I have some medical issues and should not become pregnant again (its actually not possible anymore because of it).
05/29/2012
sexystuffeve sexystuffeve
Quote:
Originally posted by xOhxSoxScandalousx
I'm curious as to who on EF would be a Surrogate mother if the opportunity presented itself. Why or why not?
No, I wouldn't be.
05/29/2012
meezerosity meezerosity
No, absolutely not ever. I have terrible genetic health problems that run in my family that I also have. I would not want to bring a child in to the world that has a very high possibility of having the same disorders.
05/29/2012
Ilovelingerie Ilovelingerie
Quote:
Originally posted by xOhxSoxScandalousx
I'm curious as to who on EF would be a Surrogate mother if the opportunity presented itself. Why or why not?
I couldn't be, after carrying a baby for 8-9 months... I don't think I could ever give it up.
05/29/2012
PropertyOfPotter PropertyOfPotter
I used to think I could, and then I had three beautiful babies! If it was someone extremely near and dear to me that couldn't, I would consider it...but it would be very difficult!
05/29/2012
MissCandyland MissCandyland
I probably wouldn't be one.
05/29/2012
Mrs. Tickle and Giggle Mrs. Tickle and Giggle
I would love to, but because my youngest has a neurological disorder I am not qualified.
05/29/2012
CindyH CindyH
i could not i would get to attached
05/31/2012
LaSchwartz LaSchwartz
I would under one condition if i had a close friend that could not have a kid and she asked me to i would because I know I would get attached and I know my close friends would let me see the the child whenever.so I would still be apart of his or her life and I wold help a women become a mother.Otherwise nope.
05/31/2012
Tork48309 Tork48309
As a male, I don't know if I could be a surrogate father let alone how woman could be a surrogate mother. Too many emotions. I guess mayby if it would a close family member.
05/31/2012
nova2014 nova2014
I don't think I could be a surrogate because I'd miss my child too much, I wouldn't be able to let them go even if they were going to a close friend
02/07/2013
Total posts: 53
Unique posters: 48
xOhxSoxScandalousx xOhxSoxScandalousx
If you chose "Yes I would definitely be a Surrogate mother", would you have to be paid for it or would you do it for free? Why or why not?
Answers (private voting - your screen name will NOT appear in the results):
Yes of course I have to be paid for it.
26  (84%)
No I would do it for free
1  (3%)
I'd want to be paid for it but would do it free for someone I cared about.
4  (13%)
Total votes: 31
Poll is closed
04/27/2012
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Highmaintenancegirl916 Highmaintenancegirl916
hmm,haven't thought about it.i think for free tho.
04/27/2012
P'Gell P'Gell
I'd never do it. But, I do think as pregnancy is very draining, as well as at times life threatening and has a huge impact on a woman's life, she should be paid to do this for someone, relative or stranger.
04/27/2012
PeaceToTheMiddleEast PeaceToTheMiddleEast
Quote:
Originally posted by P'Gell
I'd never do it. But, I do think as pregnancy is very draining, as well as at times life threatening and has a huge impact on a woman's life, she should be paid to do this for someone, relative or stranger.
I agree.
04/27/2012
BG529 BG529
I wouldn't except extra money. I'd just want the medical bills to be covered. and all that...
04/27/2012
Ms. N Ms. N
I would expect medical bills to be covered, but otherwise, I would do it for free.
04/27/2012
Badass Badass
If I could, I would definitly expect to be paid..
Nine months of my life gone with nothing for it? Wouldnt be fair.
04/27/2012
xilliannax xilliannax
Yes, I'd want to be paid but just to cover medical bills. You want your baby to be healthy right? You're against be doing this in my bathtub? (even though thats where my eldest was born >.<)
04/27/2012
ginas ginas
Quote:
Originally posted by xOhxSoxScandalousx
If you chose "Yes I would definitely be a Surrogate mother", would you have to be paid for it or would you do it for free? Why or why not?
The only reason I'd be doing it is for the pay.
04/27/2012
unfulfilled unfulfilled
I'd at least want the hospital-doctors visits paid for. I can't afford to shell out that kind of money again.
04/28/2012
unfulfilled unfulfilled
Quote:
Originally posted by xilliannax
Yes, I'd want to be paid but just to cover medical bills. You want your baby to be healthy right? You're against be doing this in my bathtub? (even though thats where my eldest was born >.<)
My youngest was born in the front seat of the car because I wouldn't get out of the bathtub and waited too long. My husband delivered him.
04/28/2012
xOhxSoxScandalousx xOhxSoxScandalousx
Quote:
Originally posted by unfulfilled
My youngest was born in the front seat of the car because I wouldn't get out of the bathtub and waited too long. My husband delivered him.
Wow! That is amazing. Must be a great story to tell when your kids get older. You must have loved your husband more than ever after that. Haha
04/28/2012
MissCandyland MissCandyland
I would want to be paid.
05/29/2012
Total posts: 13
Unique posters: 11
xOhxSoxScandalousx xOhxSoxScandalousx
I honestly don't think I could be a Surrogate mother. It would just be weird for me to go through 9 months of pregnancy only to give the baby away after labor. I think I would feel a major attachment to the child since I would have went through 9 months with that baby growing inside of me.

But the other day I read an article about a woman who was a Surrogate mother for her sister because her sister could not reproduce. She said it was the most amazing thing to give birth to her sisters child. Seeing her sister and brother-in-law holding their precious baby for the first time was one of the greatest experiences she ever had. She gave them the gift of a child. That article actually made me tear up and got me thinking.

What if my younger sister could not reproduce in the future and really wanted a biological child of her own? What if she asked me to be a Surrogate mother for her? Thinking about it this way changed my mind. My sister really wants to be a mom one day and knowing that she couldn't have her own children would make me so sad. So I think I would be a Surrogate mother for her. I love her very much and I would do anything for her. At least I would still be able to see the baby since they will be my niece/nephew. I would have a great connection to them.

So this raises the question of: If you said "No I would not be a Surrogate mother", would you change your mind if your sister or other person you loved asked you to be a Surrogate mother for them? Why or why not?
Answers (private voting - your screen name will NOT appear in the results):
Yes I would only be a Surrogate mother for someone I loved or cared about.
9  (23%)
No, that would not change my mind.
29  (74%)
I would be a Surrogate mother for anyone in need.
1  (3%)
Total votes: 39
Poll is closed
04/27/2012
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Do emu Do emu
This is actually how I was born. My biological mom had me for her sister who was infertile after going through ten years of trying to get pregnant, having miscarriages and ectopic pregnancies. I have a lot of respect for my biological mom for going through that but it doesn't change my mind on the matter at all.
04/27/2012
P'Gell P'Gell
As I said, I admire women who can do this for other. But, simply having an infertile relative wouldn't change my decision never to do this for someone else. I'd do a LOT for a friend or relative, hell, I'd wet nurse a baby for a short period of time, if the situation was right. But, I couldn't carry a baby in my body for someone else. I just don't have it in me to do that. Plus, I get to attached to the baby during pregnancy.
04/27/2012
PeaceToTheMiddleEast PeaceToTheMiddleEast
No it still would not change my mind. Again I am at a age where there are a lot of precautions and again I get to attached to the baby before birth. I love my sister and brothers to death but they would have to find someone else for the job.
04/27/2012
Melan!e Melan!e
I love the idea of be able to help someone like that but I just couldn't bring myself to do it. It wouldn't change my mind. I'd get too attached.
04/27/2012
CoffeeCup CoffeeCup
It would not change my mind for the same reasons I wouldn't do it in the first place. Mostly, because women in my family have a long history of failed or complicated pregnancies. I would be a risky choice.
04/27/2012
bayosgirl bayosgirl
No, wouldn't change my mind.
04/28/2012
unfulfilled unfulfilled
Quote:
Originally posted by Do emu
This is actually how I was born. My biological mom had me for her sister who was infertile after going through ten years of trying to get pregnant, having miscarriages and ectopic pregnancies. I have a lot of respect for my biological mom for going ...
That's nice your aunt did that for your mom.
04/28/2012
unfulfilled unfulfilled
I don't think I could do it regardless of who it was for. I'd want to keep the baby that I carried.
04/28/2012
Tuesday Tuesday
The one case where I would consider it would be if a sibling wanted it. Then I'd at least be able to see the little one.
04/29/2012
sexystuffeve sexystuffeve
Quote:
Originally posted by xOhxSoxScandalousx
I honestly don't think I could be a Surrogate mother. It would just be weird for me to go through 9 months of pregnancy only to give the baby away after labor. I think I would feel a major attachment to the child since I would have went through 9 ...
The answer would still be no
05/29/2012
Ilovelingerie Ilovelingerie
Quote:
Originally posted by xOhxSoxScandalousx
I honestly don't think I could be a Surrogate mother. It would just be weird for me to go through 9 months of pregnancy only to give the baby away after labor. I think I would feel a major attachment to the child since I would have went through 9 ...
It wouldn't change my mind
05/29/2012
MissCandyland MissCandyland
I don't think that would change my mind.
05/29/2012
Total posts: 13
Unique posters: 12
xOhxSoxScandalousx xOhxSoxScandalousx
I asked my husband about this the other day and he was totally against it. Even if it was for my sister he would still not want me to. I guess he felt that me being pregnant with someone else's baby would be too much for him to handle. He would still feel like that child was ours because it was growing in my belly, even though biologically it is not. What would your spouse say if you wanted to become a Surrogate mother? Would be be okay with it? Why or why not?
Answers (private voting - your screen name will NOT appear in the results):
He would be against it.
19  (49%)
He would be for it.
3  (8%)
He wouldn't necessarily like the idea but he would leave the decision up to me since it's my body.
5  (13%)
Other?
12  (31%)
Total votes: 39
Poll is closed
04/27/2012
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humblepie humblepie
Other, no spouse! I suspect my fwb would be less than thrilled at first, but he has a thing for pregnant women, so he'd probably get more okay with it once I started to show.
04/27/2012
P'Gell P'Gell
My husband would be thoroughly against it. I am against if for myself, too. So, it's OK. He falls in love with my preggie belly, and always used to talk to our babies when I started to get big, he got attached before they were born, as did I. (In fact, early in the pregnancies, he'd goof around and cup his hands, put them on my belly and yell things, "to the little shrimpie!" in there. "HELLOOOOO SHRIMPIE!" (Y'know how fetuses look like little shrimps? That image really stuck with him for some reason.)

Neither of us could do this as we get too attached when I'm pregnant.
04/27/2012
xOhxSoxScandalousx xOhxSoxScandalousx
Quote:
Originally posted by P'Gell
My husband would be thoroughly against it. I am against if for myself, too. So, it's OK. He falls in love with my preggie belly, and always used to talk to our babies when I started to get big, he got attached before they were born, as did I. (In ...
I totally understand. It really isn't for everyone. I felt the same exact way as u but I would do it for my sister if she truly wanted me too. I would just have to keep in mind that the baby isn't biologically mines. He/she was made with my sisters egg n her husbands sperm. It would be a tough one though! My husband is really against it. We both got really attached to our daughter when she was swimming around in my belly for 9 months.
04/27/2012
BG529 BG529
My SO would probably be against it. or if I was to ask him about it he'd probably say "I'd have to be put in the situation"
04/27/2012
PeaceToTheMiddleEast PeaceToTheMiddleEast
I don't have a spouse. So I can't answer this question.
04/27/2012
Melan!e Melan!e
No spouse for me either buy my boyfriend would not like it if we were in that situation. He'd leave the decision up to me but he knows that I wouldn't be able to do it anyway.
04/27/2012
Badass Badass
My spouse probably wouldn't go for it, but only because he knows all of my ovary issues and would be concerned with my wellbeing.
04/27/2012
xilliannax xilliannax
Quote:
Originally posted by xOhxSoxScandalousx
I asked my husband about this the other day and he was totally against it. Even if it was for my sister he would still not want me to. I guess he felt that me being pregnant with someone else's baby would be too much for him to handle. He would ...
My guy has a HUGE pregnancy fetish (much like most of my fans) and would have no problems with me being pregnant without the extra mouth, tears or diapers.
04/27/2012
bayosgirl bayosgirl
He would be totally against it, as I am.
04/28/2012
unfulfilled unfulfilled
My husband would be against it especially if the baby ended up being a little girl because he wants a girl so bad to go with our two boys, but we just can't afford three children.
04/28/2012
Lady Bear Lady Bear
My partner would not be for it. I am not sure if I want more than one child and I would not be willing to have a child for someone else. It sounds selfish but I'm not sure I could give up a child I carried for 9 months. It would be a difficult situation that I don't want to be in.
04/29/2012
sexystuffeve sexystuffeve
Quote:
Originally posted by xOhxSoxScandalousx
I asked my husband about this the other day and he was totally against it. Even if it was for my sister he would still not want me to. I guess he felt that me being pregnant with someone else's baby would be too much for him to handle. He would ...
I seriously doubt he would be okay with it.
05/29/2012
Ilovelingerie Ilovelingerie
Quote:
Originally posted by xOhxSoxScandalousx
I asked my husband about this the other day and he was totally against it. Even if it was for my sister he would still not want me to. I guess he felt that me being pregnant with someone else's baby would be too much for him to handle. He would ...
He wouldn't be for it, I'm pretty sure about that(he's not my spouse yet though) 2 more months! I'm so excited.
05/29/2012
Missmarc Missmarc
Quote:
Originally posted by xOhxSoxScandalousx
I asked my husband about this the other day and he was totally against it. Even if it was for my sister he would still not want me to. I guess he felt that me being pregnant with someone else's baby would be too much for him to handle. He would ...
He would definitely be against it.
05/31/2012
Total posts: 15
Unique posters: 14