Have you ever been in a polyamorous relationship or wanted one?

Haiku Haiku
I've been in closed poly relationships, but for the last three years I've only being practicing open poly. It fits my desires and beliefs better. I've lost count of how many poly relationships (open and closed) I've been in, and I absolutely enjoy practicing polyamory better than attempting monogamy.
08/31/2011
arewehavingfun? arewehavingfun?
Quote:
Originally posted by ac0313
Currently starting one. We met in a non-traditionsl setting; she has always desired a polyamorous relationship, but had always tried to fit within a monogomous one...an obvious mis-match. We have had many discussions about the importance of open and ... More
How did the polymourous conversation with your partner start? Were there any hurt feelings (like love me and have sex with me but don't get obsessed with the sex and why am I not enoug?) How much sex is enough?
09/13/2011
Jon S Jon S
no i dont think i could do it
09/13/2011
ToyBoy ToyBoy
It intrigues me, but I really don't know if I have the time to be with more than one person. I like to spend all my free time with my partner, and trying to split my time up and work it around what I already have to do...so I think its just not for me.
09/13/2011
XzombehxbearzX XzombehxbearzX
Quote:
Originally posted by callsignhusker
Have you ever been in a polyamorous relationship or wanted one?
Me and my fiance are both Poly. Been together a year and a few months ago realized were both not one meant for commitment so we both went to being open.
09/19/2011
Airen Wolf Airen Wolf
Quote:
Originally posted by ToyBoy
It intrigues me, but I really don't know if I have the time to be with more than one person. I like to spend all my free time with my partner, and trying to split my time up and work it around what I already have to do...so I think its just not ... More
What a lovely realization and a lucky partner you have! Time really is the issue here and, for us, the worst problem we have had to overcome. It is the root of our jealousy issues as well.
09/21/2011
Illumin8 Illumin8
Nope, never been in one, and haven't ever had the desire to.
09/21/2011
arewehavingfun? arewehavingfun?
Quote:
Originally posted by viridian3701
i just get too jealous
AGREE!!! I can understand having multiple (not too many!) committed relationships at the same time, but what I can not understan is sharing anyone. If I did not have a 2nd person that I was sexual with and in a 2nd loving relationship with, it would tear me apart if my parnter had another loving relationship. I guess I would rather not know any details.
09/21/2011
arewehavingfun? arewehavingfun?
Quote:
Originally posted by CreamySweet
About 5 or 6 years ago my husband and I were in an adult toy shop in Reno. The girl at the counter said that if we were looking for something fun to do that we should go check out a local bar that turns into a swingers club a couple nights a week. ... More
How do you feel about your husband having sex in front of you with other men and/or women? Just curious.
09/21/2011
arewehavingfun? arewehavingfun?
Quote:
Originally posted by CreamySweet
About 5 or 6 years ago my husband and I were in an adult toy shop in Reno. The girl at the counter said that if we were looking for something fun to do that we should go check out a local bar that turns into a swingers club a couple nights a week. ... More
Do you just have to inform your partner or do you need the stamp of approval? Do you both have the power to veto one's desires and how does it feel to be told "no"?
09/21/2011
TameTemptress TameTemptress
I'm not sure that I could handle it, personally.
09/21/2011
chivalrousT chivalrousT
I would be unable to go through with a poly relationship. Over time I honestly want to know that there is someone there for you.
10/10/2011
DefectiveTea DefectiveTea
I was in a poly relationship for about 4 and a half months. It wasn't bad while it lasted.
10/28/2011
Beck Beck
It would really depend. I would want a say in the women and I know he would not want me to sleep with any men. So it would not work out. I would like to but only if I could sleep with men and women as long they are ok by him and would expect the same in return.
10/28/2011
mandys11 mandys11
Quote:
Originally posted by callsignhusker
Have you ever been in a polyamorous relationship or wanted one?
I couldn't have real feelings for either of them. Maybe I'm a little jealous, but I just wouldn't be able to deal with the thought of sharing someone I truly care about and being shared myself.
10/31/2011
PeachieClean PeachieClean
Tried it once or twice, didn't work out. I dated a guy and a girl at the same time and he got upset when I didn't spend time with him, she got upset when I didn't spend time with her and I got sick of both of them. I mean, we all hung out and had fun together, but it's so much effort to be with one person that a second wouldn't work. As for a guy having a second gal, I'm way jealous and can't handle open relationships. My current boy and I nearly broke up because we tried the "open" thing. One time he had sex with someone else and I was jealous, another I ended up drunk and half naked at a party and that's when we decided that we just couldn't do it.
11/01/2011
Destri Destri
We are thinking about getting into one right now. We have met a person who seems as if she would fit in... we are taking it really slow though. Hubby and I have talked about this from every aspect we can think of extensively. I think we have a pretty good handle on how it would be, the potential problems and the like. I will definitely post around here if it actually happens.
11/23/2011
geliebt geliebt
So far, it's never felt like something that would work well for me. I like the one on one dynamic of a monogamous relationship quite a lot!
11/25/2011
GoneBabyGone GoneBabyGone
I am in a steady relationship with one man now. While I like women as well I am uncomfortable with having another woman in the relationship. We also have a D/s style relationship, both of us switch but he is predominantly Dom and I sub. We have recently been discussing adding a new person to our relationship to satisfy my dominant needs. The idea of a woman is pleasant but I worry a woman may expect more than we are willing to give. There are many submissive men that seem to be okay with the idea so that is what we are currently contemplating.
11/25/2011
CreamySweet CreamySweet
Quote:
Originally posted by arewehavingfun?
Do you just have to inform your partner or do you need the stamp of approval? Do you both have the power to veto one's desires and how does it feel to be told "no"?
Sorry I took so long to respond to this. I just saw tonight that you had asked me something in this post. We each have mutual power of veto or approval. If I say I don't want to or he says no then thats the answer - no fight or sadness. Its totally fine when its a no - there are always other opportunities later for someone else.
11/25/2011
CreamySweet CreamySweet
Quote:
Originally posted by arewehavingfun?
How do you feel about your husband having sex in front of you with other men and/or women? Just curious.
He doesnt have sex with other men at all. And so far he has only done it with one other woman in a couple swap. Totally fine with it! Good for him!!
11/25/2011
AndromedaJane AndromedaJane
Not sure how people make this work once they have kids.
12/01/2011
Katelyn Katelyn
Quote:
Originally posted by callsignhusker
Have you ever been in a polyamorous relationship or wanted one?
I have never been in one, I think its amazing that people can do this but I think I would get jealous too easily.
12/02/2011
HannahPanda HannahPanda
I have for around a year or so. It takes strong commitment and confidence to maintain such a relationship. I would never judge others in that kind of relationship but I've tried it and it didn't work out for me.
12/02/2011
Airen Wolf Airen Wolf
Quote:
Originally posted by AndromedaJane
Not sure how people make this work once they have kids.
It works just fine with kids...I have two teenage daughters with Sigel and a 2 years old son with Arch.
12/03/2011
Tripod95 Tripod95
Quote:
Originally posted by callsignhusker
Have you ever been in a polyamorous relationship or wanted one?
I would like one a lot. I have always found monogamy to be nice but not exactly what i want and so ive wanted to try a polyamorous relationship for a while now.
12/05/2011
Daisie Daisie
Have I ever been in a polyamorous relationship? Yes, I have a hodgepodge of a family right now, with essentially two husbands, a relationship with one of my husband's submissives, and another submissive that I'd like to see gone because of her age.

In reading through prior responses, I'm surprised at how many people equate having a polyamorous relationship with having sex with another person outside of marriage. Or how many people say that polyamory isn't "serious". I think a lot of people are confusing polyamory with swinging.

Relationships developed through polyamory are just like relationships developed any other way... you meet someone, you're attracted, you flirt, you go on a date, you wonder if she'll ever call you back, you get giddy when she does. You wear a stupid, happy expression that makes your husband chuckle and start unpacking double ended dildos to have them handy, just in case. Your life becomes a hectic whirlwind of time management nightmares.... ugh. You start feeling closed in by a house of 3000 sq feet and start dreaming of more bedrooms and an even bigger bed.

Polyamory is not swinging. There is nothing wrong with swinging. It's super fun, but short term and commitment free. Just good old sex with other partners. NOT polyamory.

Polyamory is having multiple loves. Multiple relationships. Multiple people in your life on a consistent basis. You have personalities to juggle, jealousies to overcome, and never, ever enough time for everyone. Ever. Scheduling helps, and being flexible about the scheduling helps even more. With a positive attitude and a lot of patience, polyamory can be a very rewarding choice for many families.
12/07/2011
mastersonv mastersonv
I haven't been in one but my fiance and I are interested in possibly being in one. Unfortunately where we live not many believe in that life style.
12/08/2011
SaraU29 SaraU29
Quote:
Originally posted by callsignhusker
Have you ever been in a polyamorous relationship or wanted one?
It would be interesting to try, I wouldn't mind trying it out too see how it was.
12/09/2011
SaraU29 SaraU29
Quote:
Originally posted by callsignhusker
Have you ever been in a polyamorous relationship or wanted one?
Even though this is my favorite fantasy, I don't think I would do well sharing.
01/08/2012
Total posts: 94
Unique posters: 74