How do you refer to your relationship?

fizzygato fizzygato 02/09/2013

What is the difference between polyamorous and non-exclusive?

Which do you identify as? I'm wondering because I know someone who says they don't ID as polyamorous and refuse to, but identify as non-exclusive, but seem to act like they're poly. I'm not sure what the difference is.

Are you adamant about your relationship terminology, and if so, which term do you ID with?

Invited: All users.

Discussion Topics

1.
fizzygato fizzygato
Which term do you identify with?

Is there a difference to you, and what is the difference? Which do you prefer and why?
Answers (public voting - your screen name will appear in the results):
Airen Wolf , smlove , DoneWithAlltheLies , Tasty Latina , pinkpottergirl , Mistress M. , new nick , The scientist , FleurDevereux
9  (24%)
mystepmotherisafish , ac0313
2  (5%)
IvyFayette , noway , LittleHouse , Missmarc , dv8 , comatose-kitty , SecretKinksters , chicmichiw , bog , XxFallenAngelxX , Stinkytofu10 , *Camoprincess* , sktb0007 , captainsgirl , gwenrox , hillys , Stagger13 , werewolf , lilswitch , Meltingfish , DreezzyyBabyy
21  (55%)
amazon , Terri69 , brevado , SecondStory , souviet , Incendiaire
6  (16%)
Total votes: 38
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Airen Wolf Airen Wolf
I refer to our relationship as poly because we are polyamorous. We are non-exclusive to be sure and Sigel rarely develops more than friendly feelings for his playmates but we are open to the possibility of love. I love Sigel and Arch. Arch loves me and cares deeply for Sigel, and the same is true for Sigel.

I think the reason I consider us poly is we are open to the possibility of loving more and content with the loves we have currently.
02/09/2013
IvyFayette IvyFayette
It depends to me on the people who I am with. If love is involved with multiple people than poly but if it's only playmates I consider it non-exclusive.
02/14/2013
ac0313 ac0313
Non-exclusive or open relationship. We are not poly...at least not now/yet...since neither of us love any of our other partners. We have FWBs, playmates, and boy/girl friends, but the relationships we develop outside of ourselves are short of the loving relationships that we consider to be compulsory to be poly.

Regardless, labels are really only good for outsiders to possibly understand the dynamics and boundaries of your relationship without having to spend an hour explaining all the words needed for them to comprehend!
02/27/2013
bog bog
Quote:
Originally posted by fizzygato
Which term do you identify with?

Is there a difference to you, and what is the difference? Which do you prefer and why?
I tend to just refer to my partners as my "friends" - not big on labels. I was with a primary partner not so long ago who was really into labels, and we said "open relationship" worked...
02/27/2013
Stinkytofu10 Stinkytofu10
Quote:
Originally posted by fizzygato
Which term do you identify with?

Is there a difference to you, and what is the difference? Which do you prefer and why?
other.
02/27/2013
gwenrox gwenrox
I agree that it is really hard to define what exactly it means to be poly. My husband and have only recently considered using it as a definition for our relationship, and then again, all definitions are tricky. I could write paragraphs trying to explain my primary relationship. Poly usually works better for us because when we say "open relationship", people tend to assume that we are either swingers or that one of us is cheating on the other.
03/05/2013
Stagger13 Stagger13
Quote:
Originally posted by fizzygato
Which term do you identify with?

Is there a difference to you, and what is the difference? Which do you prefer and why?
It depends-exclusive I guess.
03/05/2013
smlove smlove
my wife and I are poly. we have many loves and play partners, but we haven't had any serious partners yet.
03/06/2013
pinkpottergirl pinkpottergirl
We are poly, but not open per say. We are a triad and happy with only having each other
08/25/2013
werewolf werewolf
Quote:
Originally posted by fizzygato
Which term do you identify with?

Is there a difference to you, and what is the difference? Which do you prefer and why?
I just refer to our relationship as open.
May 10, 6:15 pm
KinkyCouple KinkyCouple
When I was in a group relationship we defined as poly because we were exclusive to our group. We all actually broke up because two people wanted to be more open.
Jun 22, 5:08 pm
envyoddball envyoddball
Quote:
Originally posted by gwenrox
I agree that it is really hard to define what exactly it means to be poly. My husband and have only recently considered using it as a definition for our relationship, and then again, all definitions are tricky. I could write paragraphs trying to ... More
Same here. I'm most comfortable with "open relationship", because we do kind of work under a primary relationship and then secondary relationships, which I've been told is atypical, but if haven't really talked to many other poly people. But we've agreed that if any if us get uncomfortable, it all stops, and my fiancé wants to at least know the people I'm sleeping with, and I would expect the same from him. We kind of said like... If there's secrets, that's going to cause more problems than anything.

I say polyamorous most of the time though because for whatever reason, like you, when I say "open relationship", people immediately think that our relationship is falling apart and we're looking for outs. Or that we're cheating. I've never really known what term is the right term, but I've tried not to ever hold too much faith in what to call myself anyway. We are what we are.
Jul 15, 5:34 pm
FleurDevereux FleurDevereux
Quote:
Originally posted by fizzygato
Which term do you identify with?

Is there a difference to you, and what is the difference? Which do you prefer and why?
I prefer to be considered polyamorous. I consider non-exclusive to be with someone, but seeing other people. Polyamorous would be more along the lines of being in a relationship with multiple people together. My husband and I are in a loving married relationship, but we are polyamorous. We are open to having another person join our family. Not sure if that makes any more sense with the way I've written it.
Sep 23, 9:25 pm
Total posts: 14
Unique posters: 14