Do you believe that monogamy is natural or unnatural for humans?

freda freda
Quote:
Originally posted by Tori Rebel
There have been studies done and there is a large population of people who do not believe that monogamy is a natural function for humans. One of the most popular reasons given is that you very rarely see monogamy in nature and since humans are ... More
unnatural
02/22/2012
MimiPhryxus MimiPhryxus
I don't think monogamy is only for "higher sentient beings" look at wolves, cranes, beavers, even termites mate for life in monogamous relationships.

To me its a spiritual thing. I believe in reincarnation and that monogamy might just depend on how many of my partners of past lives could be on this plane at this time.

Not exactly what you're looking for I suppose but there you have it.
02/26/2012
humblepie humblepie
I think it all depends on the individual. Personally, I'm very monogamous, but I see the appeal polygamy has to others, and I respect that. Often it seems to me that those who speak out the hardest against polygamy are those who feel that their relationship is threatened by it. As long as the people in a relationship are on the same page with this stuff, it's all good.
03/02/2012
Starshiptrooper84 Starshiptrooper84
It depends on the individual. People are flat out different across the board. I am a monogamous person because I want to be and that is what I feel is right. I don't have a desire to be with anyone else sexually. I feel that my girlfriend deserves that and would like the same in return. I am glad she feels the same way too. Be it upbringing or natural, that is how we are at any rate. Other people by nature I do feel are polygamous.
03/02/2012
scaredlittleboy scaredlittleboy
Quote:
Originally posted by Envy
IMO, I think as a biological organism, we are poly. As a 'higher' sentient being, we have the ability to be mono. I think it just depends on what side you look at it, the scientific side, or the other side.
I agree. Our minds make it possible to be monogamous, but biologically we have a default drive to be poly.
03/02/2012
Azule Azule
I think monogamy is natural for humans and although we have a polygamous calling, the society we've set up works more successfully with a majority of the people being paired up as monogamous.
03/26/2012
Voir Voir
I think it depends on the individual. Some people feel more comfortable in a monogamous relationship and some in an open relationship. A lot of it has to do with how a person was raised etc. and how they view the world and grow etc. but it's not one or many people's place to say what is and isn't natural for everyone because it varies in degrees from person to person... and only they can say what is or isn't comfortable for them, in the long run.
03/27/2012
catsin catsin
Quote:
Originally posted by Tori Rebel
There have been studies done and there is a large population of people who do not believe that monogamy is a natural function for humans. One of the most popular reasons given is that you very rarely see monogamy in nature and since humans are ... More
While monogamy has its benefits in an overpopulated world it has no inherent natural value to us as humans. It is not how we have always been, it is an adaptation to accommodate for our overpopulation.

As an anthropologist in study, I've come across numerous books about tribes not yet introduced to modern civilizations "The Old Way" is one such book as is "Mutant Message". In each of these texts the tribesman are polyamorous. Both sexes are able to take on multiple husbands/wives. Their ability to do such provides their community with a mechanism to continue life.

I believe that, as humanity has peopled the Earth so incredibly with billions in number, monogamy has become a vital part to sustaining our habitat as it helps keep the population controlled. HOWEVER, evangelists and such, who believe procreating is God's way, thus go out and have nineteen or so children do such at our disadvantage.
03/28/2012
xxjoel xxjoel
I think that deeming any cultural behavior "natural" or "unnatural" is presumptuous and can lead to a lot of unpleasant consequences. I think polyamory is an orientation, just like homo- or bisexuality.
03/29/2012
Airen Wolf Airen Wolf
Quote:
Originally posted by xxjoel
I think that deeming any cultural behavior "natural" or "unnatural" is presumptuous and can lead to a lot of unpleasant consequences. I think polyamory is an orientation, just like homo- or bisexuality.
I concur whole heartedly!
03/30/2012
calliope calliope
A little bit of both? I think it's more the person and personality.
04/02/2012
tammyandy69 tammyandy69
After reading these post and our own again I feel I need to post again.
Sex in all it's forms is a choice...we chose do it or not to.
But I believe in my heart that we are not hard wired to be with one person.
Yes because we are little more than animals, but more deeply because that having sex with many is natures way of assuring the breed lives on.
How I feel about monogamy is it's a creation of the church to impose control on people. Look at some of the punishments for sleeping around in history. I fell because of this being done by the church and them putting the fear of GOD in us, we are afraid and conformed to there will. and that is we many choose to be with one.
04/22/2012
badk1tty badk1tty
Quote:
Originally posted by Tori Rebel
There have been studies done and there is a large population of people who do not believe that monogamy is a natural function for humans. One of the most popular reasons given is that you very rarely see monogamy in nature and since humans are ... More
I think it depends on the person
04/22/2012
Ahatmadeofshoes12 Ahatmadeofshoes12
Mono v.s. poly is a continuum and some people are mono, some are poly and some are somewhere in between. Monogamy is absolutely unnatural for some and for others its the most natural thing in the world. There is nothing wrong with either. Its a personal choice and people have to do what is right for them. What is wrong is that our society treats mono as the only ethical option and that's really limiting and unfair to those that aren't naturally monogamous.
04/28/2012
Nirelan Nirelan
Quote:
Originally posted by Tori Rebel
There have been studies done and there is a large population of people who do not believe that monogamy is a natural function for humans. One of the most popular reasons given is that you very rarely see monogamy in nature and since humans are ... More
I think we force ourselves to stay faithful....if not for rules of society, we'd all have twenty wives and husbands lol Thank God that's not the case...I can barely handle the one I have!
05/02/2012
comatose-kitty comatose-kitty
It's unnatural, but not a bad thing.
05/07/2012
Jeanette Jeanette
Quote:
Originally posted by Tori Rebel
There have been studies done and there is a large population of people who do not believe that monogamy is a natural function for humans. One of the most popular reasons given is that you very rarely see monogamy in nature and since humans are ... More
Natural, at least for me!
05/07/2012
pix pix
I believe both monogamy and polyamory can be natural, depending on the person
05/18/2012
Ilovelingerie Ilovelingerie
Quote:
Originally posted by Tori Rebel
There have been studies done and there is a large population of people who do not believe that monogamy is a natural function for humans. One of the most popular reasons given is that you very rarely see monogamy in nature and since humans are ... More
It is perfectly natural, but not everyone LIKES to be monogomous, personally I have no need for anyone but my fiance, so why would I go anywhere else?
05/20/2012
pasdechat pasdechat
On a biological level, it's probably true that most humans want multiple sexual partners. I'd have to say, though, that emotionally many (if not most) humans feel more satisfied in a monogamous relationship, if for no other reason than that we are programmed biologically to want our partners to be faithful, and thee is usually some expectation of reciprocity.

I also think that the argument about the time and effort needed to raise a human child is a powerful one. A lot of birds are monogamous because it requires two parents to care for the hatchlings, and you could argue that the same is to some extent true of humans.
05/20/2012
Do emu Do emu
Quote:
Originally posted by Tori Rebel
There have been studies done and there is a large population of people who do not believe that monogamy is a natural function for humans. One of the most popular reasons given is that you very rarely see monogamy in nature and since humans are ... More
I think it's both natural and unnatural. It really depends on the person of course. We're not here to say what's wrong or right for every person.
05/21/2012
Terri69 Terri69
I think it is natural for people...
05/21/2012
SkinFlute SkinFlute
Can't lie to yourself, humans are biologically poly. Whether or not we are evolving to become mono is a debate, but in the past we were defiantly promiscuous.
05/25/2012
gsfanatic gsfanatic
It depends on a person to person basis. I've met people who were both dedicated polygamous and dedicated monogamous, and both lifestyles had advantages.
05/26/2012
Crimson Vixen Crimson Vixen
I don't believe that monogamy is necessarily natural, however, we do have penguins to take an example from.

The more I think about it the more it would seem natural for humans to be polyamorous, but there is always an exception to every rule.

It is a matter of preference, I suppose.
07/08/2012
SubmissiveFeminist SubmissiveFeminist
I don't believe in natural/unnatural. To each their own, I always say. I support whatever makes people happy, no matter what is considered "natural."
07/08/2012
animepanda89 animepanda89
It can be both, some people just lean towards having one partner where others desire many. It is all what feel right for that person.
07/10/2012
marshmallow marshmallow
I think it's unnatural.
07/17/2012
Bodhi Bodhi
I think it's too generalizing to say that people are 'naturally' or 'unnaturally' monogamous. I think Monogamy can be natural for some people, and polyamory can be natural for others.
08/06/2012
namelesschaos namelesschaos
The probelm here is that when trying to define thing as "natural" is tricky. When people say poly or mono in this context it is flirted through our perceptions of these concept as social constructs. In reality what is natural is more complex then that.

A lot of people have gotten the message that we are not biologically looking at a species level "naturally hard wired to be "monogamous" but we are also not hardwired to be "poly" either. From biological stand point you having multiple partners increase your sexual fitness (not "naturally" monogamous) however here is the problem your partner doing the same reduces your sexual fitness (naturally sexual jealous and not naturally polyamorous). On the indivdual level the "optimal" biological relationship would be one where your are "poly" but all your partners are "mono". However a natural system couldn't sustain that for very long, so what is actually "natural" is more a conflict between "poly" impulses which improve your sexual fitness (multiple partners) and "mono" impulses which improve fitness (intense sexual jealousy).
08/06/2012
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Unique posters: 188