Swingers Clubs: Your Thoughts?
Swingers Clubs: Your Thoughts?
I'm really in the middle on swingers clubs. We don't have any actual clubs in my area and a lot of the swingers I've met are just... creepy and pushy. However, there are plenty of folks who play with others at our BDSM gatherings and they're cool as hell.
So, for me, it would have to be a club with a cool as hell atmosphere rather than a creepy, pushy one.
So, for me, it would have to be a club with a cool as hell atmosphere rather than a creepy, pushy one.
09/03/2009
I think I'm with Carrie Ann on this one. (Shocking!) Somehow the swinging couples I've come across just strike me wrong. Probably it's just I've met some creepies and has nothing to do with swingers as a rule. But I've had a much more positive experience with people who play with others at BDSM gatherings. I don't know enough about swingers clubs to know if there is a reason my experience is as it is.
Either way, I am in favor of everyone doing what they love.
Either way, I am in favor of everyone doing what they love.
09/04/2009
Quote:
We've had the same experience with the few swingers that we've met--- super pushy and a bit creepy. I'd hate to be in a whole club full of them if that's what they're all like.
Originally posted by
Carrie Ann
I'm really in the middle on swingers clubs. We don't have any actual clubs in my area and a lot of the swingers I've met are just... creepy and pushy. However, there are plenty of folks who play with others at our BDSM gatherings and they're cool
...
I'm really in the middle on swingers clubs. We don't have any actual clubs in my area and a lot of the swingers I've met are just... creepy and pushy. However, there are plenty of folks who play with others at our BDSM gatherings and they're cool as hell.
So, for me, it would have to be a club with a cool as hell atmosphere rather than a creepy, pushy one.
So, for me, it would have to be a club with a cool as hell atmosphere rather than a creepy, pushy one.
09/04/2009
I'd love an actual swingers club where I didn't feel pressured, as you described Valyn. I don't know that I'd participate because I'm usually not one for sexual relations with strangers -but I'd let others watch me and my partner.
Unfortunately I'm pretty sure no place like this exists within a reasonable driving distance of my home.
Unfortunately I'm pretty sure no place like this exists within a reasonable driving distance of my home.
09/04/2009
One of the places we have fetnights here is an actual swingers club but it's made very clear to the regular visitors that it is a BDSM night it works okay and there haven't been any issues, the club is well run and everyone is lovely. Most of the swingers are rather curious when it comes to watching people being flogged etc. I'm a hellish wee voyer so it makes for an interesting night lol.
09/05/2009
orchid14
I've been to several clubs. One "sex" club in SF. One BDSM club in SF. One sex/swingers club in LA. All were extremely laid back and friendly. There was no pressure from anyone. Certainly not any behavior that you might have to deal with that you didn't want to. I get more of that at a regular nightclub.
09/07/2009
Quote:
That's been my experience too. Through public play events (BDSM and sex events) I have met the most amazing and down to earth "swinger" couples.
Originally posted by
Dragon
I've been to several clubs. One "sex" club in SF. One BDSM club in SF. One sex/swingers club in LA. All were extremely laid back and friendly. There was no pressure from anyone. Certainly not any behavior that you might have to deal with that
...
I've been to several clubs. One "sex" club in SF. One BDSM club in SF. One sex/swingers club in LA. All were extremely laid back and friendly. There was no pressure from anyone. Certainly not any behavior that you might have to deal with that you didn't want to. I get more of that at a regular nightclub.
Going out for appetizers and drinks with swingers I'd met (with my husband) via online or whatever? They've always been those creapy off putting swinger types and I feel icky just being around. At clubs? So far its been FABULOUS!
As a random, slightly off topic aside, the swingers I have met who I am most fond of (not to hook up with, my husband and I don't actually "swing") are *ALWAYS* much older.
09/07/2009
It's disappointing to me to hear about pushy and sexually nasty swingers since I woud love to find a nice group of people who would interest my husband and I without the creepy pressure. We don't have many swinger's clubs where we live and those we do have I don't find to be strict enough with their safer sex policies to be comfortable.
09/28/2009
We have an AWESOME club up here called the Impropriety Society link, and they're kind of like a swingers club... but not quite. They're somewhere between a swingers club and a pansexual club. The sex parties thrown are different than swinger parties. There's a lot more queer and kinky people and there's more classes.
It's a very strong community and it definitely feels like a second family. I don't think I've run into any jerks at the events.
There's also lots of safer sex supplies and there's a lot of encouragement to use safer sex.
It's a very strong community and it definitely feels like a second family. I don't think I've run into any jerks at the events.
There's also lots of safer sex supplies and there's a lot of encouragement to use safer sex.
10/17/2009
oakiee1
Sounds cool, a coupe or several other couples who are compatable, attractive, etc.. Everyone has sex, great sex, erotic, tanatlizing sex. Then everyone goes home and it does'nt affect your relationship any more than going to the movies........ah are'nt fantasies the greatest.........howev er the real thing will almost always be somewhat of a let down......I get more out of fantazing about swinging or having sex in front of others than I would by actually doing it, but to each their own...................
10/30/2009
I would be totally up for this, and there ARE clubs in my area but I have some issues; of course the risk of diseases, as well as the fact that most swingers aren't gorgeous, toned, beautiful human specimens. I'm sure some of them are, but the potential lack of physical attraction just worries me. Also, I'm a little afraid of getting too much attention. I'm young (twenty-two) and consider myself pretty good looking and wouldn't want any craziness or drama occurring.
03/26/2010
We have been swinging for a number of years. There are good clubs and bad clubs. We don't normally frequent the clubs that are "swinger only". Some of these places can be very intense and over powering. There are some great sites online that allow you to meet other swingers and also post upcoming events. Many of these events are at bars in your local area. These are rarely huge orgies. It is like going to any other bar, but everyone knows why they are there. I'm not saying that there is never any drama, but drama happens anywhere in even normal settings. You just roll with it and move on. Also, safe sex is foremost in everyone's mind. That is a personal choice.
06/06/2010
Quote:
You nailed it! I've never been to a established swingers club per say, but I have been to swingers gatherings at bars with a friend who didn't want to go stag, with hubby's consent of course. The first one didn't appeal to me at all. The second was better, but being that so many of the couples are looking for a "unicorn" to play with, as soon as I said I was dominant, most lost interest and a few wanted to hear more. I had no interest in hooking up with anyone at either event, but it was nice to mingle and observe. If I returned to any clubs, it would be more as a voyeur rather than a participant. I'd rather make friends first than just hook-up with anyone, and I'm a terrible flirt, so many find me unapproachable when in fact I'm very friendly.
Originally posted by
Carrie Ann
I'm really in the middle on swingers clubs. We don't have any actual clubs in my area and a lot of the swingers I've met are just... creepy and pushy. However, there are plenty of folks who play with others at our BDSM gatherings and they're cool
...
I'm really in the middle on swingers clubs. We don't have any actual clubs in my area and a lot of the swingers I've met are just... creepy and pushy. However, there are plenty of folks who play with others at our BDSM gatherings and they're cool as hell.
So, for me, it would have to be a club with a cool as hell atmosphere rather than a creepy, pushy one.
So, for me, it would have to be a club with a cool as hell atmosphere rather than a creepy, pushy one.
07/18/2010
Quote:
My husband and I have been trying to get into the swinging lifestyle but don't really know where to start. We live in a generally close-minded area and haven't found much of anything useful. I'm curious about these sites you mentioned. Would you mind hooking me up with a link or two? Thanks!
Originally posted by
LavenderLive
We have been swinging for a number of years. There are good clubs and bad clubs. We don't normally frequent the clubs that are "swinger only". Some of these places can be very intense and over powering. There are some great sites online that
...
We have been swinging for a number of years. There are good clubs and bad clubs. We don't normally frequent the clubs that are "swinger only". Some of these places can be very intense and over powering. There are some great sites online that allow you to meet other swingers and also post upcoming events. Many of these events are at bars in your local area. These are rarely huge orgies. It is like going to any other bar, but everyone knows why they are there. I'm not saying that there is never any drama, but drama happens anywhere in even normal settings. You just roll with it and move on. Also, safe sex is foremost in everyone's mind. That is a personal choice.
07/30/2010
Been there, Done that.....and like others said above, full of creepy, pushy people. I actually like the parties quite a bit. The mingling, the flirting, the casual touching is all fun...but I found once we got people alone the fun faded fast and it was more like I went along with things to get it over with.
I have tried to explain to my husband why I don't want to go anymore - he is as thick as bricks and doesn't get it. It's easier to just tell him I don't want to swing at all!
I have tried to explain to my husband why I don't want to go anymore - he is as thick as bricks and doesn't get it. It's easier to just tell him I don't want to swing at all!
07/31/2010
We've been to clubs a couple of times, but have found we prefer going to privately hosted tease parties more. Some of the clubs we tried definitely fell into the 'full of pushy people' category and it became not unpleasant but uncomfortable experience. Having said that, we did meet some great people at one club and now get together with a them and some others who are more like-minded.
08/02/2010
LittleSinner
unfortunately most municipalities have made zoning so hard for swingers clubs that now days they are forced into the seedy areas of most cities. Back in 2000 in Phoenix a huge push was made by some politicians to have them all closed. This forced an underground club scene that just wasnt the same.
To the people who assume that swingers are *always* much older...really? Not met very many I suppose. i dont know if you can post links but check out lifestylelounge and sdc coms. My wife and I are early 30's and enjoy the lifestyle(although mostly private parties)and dont run into many "much older" people as they are more than aware that couples like us wouldnt go for them anyways. So we tend to attract the younger crowds..and I mean CROWDS especially in Vegas or London... so keep and open mind...at least go to a party once or twice even if you dont intend to play..its going to be entertaining anyways.
To the people who assume that swingers are *always* much older...really? Not met very many I suppose. i dont know if you can post links but check out lifestylelounge and sdc coms. My wife and I are early 30's and enjoy the lifestyle(although mostly private parties)and dont run into many "much older" people as they are more than aware that couples like us wouldnt go for them anyways. So we tend to attract the younger crowds..and I mean CROWDS especially in Vegas or London... so keep and open mind...at least go to a party once or twice even if you dont intend to play..its going to be entertaining anyways.
08/03/2010
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