If you have a secret fantasy that your partner may not approve of do you share it with them? This is a question that I had to ask myself once, and to me it really determines the type of relationship you may have with them.
If you have a secret fantasy that your partner may not approve of do you share it with them?
02/10/2011
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I don't think there is anything we would shun the other for, but there are some that take a little social lubrication before coming up for discussion. Sharing those things was vital to our success as a couple. It made us tighter, for some that may not be the case. I cannot imagine what it would feel like to fear being intimate in conversation with my partner.
02/10/2011
I don't have any problem being open and honest. My wife he tolerated me for 15 years, and I doubt some fantasy is going to scare her off now.
02/10/2011
I think honesty is essential for a good relationship. I understand that some people may not be entirely comfortable with my fantasies, but if a person is going to be dating me he has to at least be open and accepting. Telling someone your fantasies doesn't mean you have to perform them with that person, so in my opinion, if he was going to chastise me or shame me about my fantasies, we shouldn't be a couple.
02/10/2011
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Im asking my self the same question. I have a fantasy and im not sure how my wife will take to it. I know I want to tell her what it is and see where it leads, but im waiting for the write time. I'm not worried about her getting mad. I just think we both need to be in the write fram of mind.
Originally posted by
SexSay
If you have a secret fantasy that your partner may not approve of do you share it with them? This is a question that I had to ask myself once, and to me it really determines the type of relationship you may have with them.
02/10/2011
Sometimes I don't approve of my secret fantasies! So, I don't see a need to tell him. Sometimes it is nice just to have something like that to myself.
02/10/2011
I tell him most everything but he isn't so open about his own fantasies. I know most of his by his actions with movies and stuff but he always holds back from outright saying anything which is silly but that's just him. He's never really disapproved of my fantasies - maybe I'm not all that outrageous.
02/10/2011
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I feel like you should be open enough with your partner to share everything. Not only does it make your sex life better, but it is healthy for the relationship.
Originally posted by
SexSay
If you have a secret fantasy that your partner may not approve of do you share it with them? This is a question that I had to ask myself once, and to me it really determines the type of relationship you may have with them.
02/10/2011
I don't tell my Mr every single detail of every fantasy that comes to mind, but I do tell him themes. Like voyeurism, or being with a woman (maybe even telling him which woman), or doing something risky and in public. He'll tell me his.
I don't think we have enough time in the day to talk about every fantasy that comes to my mind, but I tell you one thing: Sex is way hotter when he comes up with fantasies for me based on the themes that turn me on and vice versa.
I don't think we have enough time in the day to talk about every fantasy that comes to my mind, but I tell you one thing: Sex is way hotter when he comes up with fantasies for me based on the themes that turn me on and vice versa.
02/10/2011
I'd definitely share it, but that's no guarantee that they'd want to do it.
02/10/2011
I want to say yes but my last relationship definitely had me saying no. There was plenty I didn't share because my ex was not supportive and open.
02/10/2011
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It's the same with my boyfriend. He's always much more reluctant to share than me, but very... tolerant when it comes to judging things that I tell him Not only concerning sex, but in general.
Originally posted by
SexyTabby
I tell him most everything but he isn't so open about his own fantasies. I know most of his by his actions with movies and stuff but he always holds back from outright saying anything which is silly but that's just him. He's never
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I tell him most everything but he isn't so open about his own fantasies. I know most of his by his actions with movies and stuff but he always holds back from outright saying anything which is silly but that's just him. He's never really disapproved of my fantasies - maybe I'm not all that outrageous.
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02/10/2011
Yes. You never know what your partner might be interested in unless you open your mouth and tell them what you want! It seems so crazy to me for people to be willing to tell perfect strangers their deepest, darkest fantasies, yet they will hide these things from their partner. That's how affairs happen. You just have to figure out compromises if it's something they don't seem interested in or something they don't enjoy after you try it.
02/10/2011
I am very open with whoever I am dating. I don't hide any fantasies.
02/10/2011
I always thought my husband would think I was a freak, so I kept my kinks to myself for many years. Oh how I wish I'd spoken up earlier. Come to find out, he shares many of the same kinks I do; it was not until I shared mine, that I was made aware!
02/10/2011
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Isn't it fantastic!?! We acted on one of them and we have many more adventures planned once this snow and ice is all gone!
Originally posted by
Redboxbaby
I always thought my husband would think I was a freak, so I kept my kinks to myself for many years. Oh how I wish I'd spoken up earlier. Come to find out, he shares many of the same kinks I do; it was not until I shared mine, that I was made aware!
02/10/2011
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I said yes I do but it wasn't always the case. I have had a pretty adversarial relationship with Sigel...that seems to happen to people who grow up with their mates. He would make me feel stupid or freaky in a bad way if he didn't approve or felt threatened. I repaid the favor in kind so it's only now that we feel comfortable talking about our deepest fantasies...and this is all because our life partner has no such hangups and LOVES to discuss fantasies without any pressure or ridicule.
Originally posted by
SexSay
If you have a secret fantasy that your partner may not approve of do you share it with them? This is a question that I had to ask myself once, and to me it really determines the type of relationship you may have with them.
02/10/2011
I've just gotten over the fear that she's going to be freaked out or bothered by it because, a lot of the time, she is. Things that I think are pretty vanilla sometimes put her off, and I don't want to live like that. So I can share and she can deal with at least knowing what it is I'd like to be trying, or I can brood and get resentful about it. I'd rather have the ball in her court.
02/10/2011
I can talk about my fantasies with my partner bcs although they are very simple, realisable fantasies, my partner just brushes them off. They are desires, that go beyond the traditional sex he likes and if it doesn't involve me wearing lingerie and parading for him he is pretty closed minded. He won't stop me from sharing or ridicule or insult me, he just lets me talk and doesn't share his fantasies bcs he has none...
02/10/2011
Sure, why not? I tend to go for fairly open-minded people who have plenty of kinks of their own, and we wouldn't necessarily have to act out my fantasies. But I like the intimacy that comes from sharing. If my partner made me feel bad or ashamed for my desires and wouldn't talk to me about it, I probably wouldn't stay with them for long.
02/10/2011
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Yeah, that.
Originally posted by
SexyStuff
Sometimes I don't approve of my secret fantasies! So, I don't see a need to tell him. Sometimes it is nice just to have something like that to myself.
02/10/2011
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I hope you don't take this offensively, but that sounds incredibly lonely to me.
Originally posted by
Naughty Student
I can talk about my fantasies with my partner bcs although they are very simple, realisable fantasies, my partner just brushes them off. They are desires, that go beyond the traditional sex he likes and if it doesn't involve me wearing lingerie
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I can talk about my fantasies with my partner bcs although they are very simple, realisable fantasies, my partner just brushes them off. They are desires, that go beyond the traditional sex he likes and if it doesn't involve me wearing lingerie and parading for him he is pretty closed minded. He won't stop me from sharing or ridicule or insult me, he just lets me talk and doesn't share his fantasies bcs he has none...
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02/10/2011
I need a little bit of 'liquid courage' if I'm bringing up something new.
02/10/2011
Disapprove is a strong word, he may not really like the fantasy, but he is the type to wish to limit me. He would probably just rather not know about some things unless I really wanted to tell him. There are some things that might be somewhat uncomfortable to share, so I keep them to myself. If he asked me about something specific that might be uncomfortable to discuss, I might open up a little. I don't like to lie. I don't think there is anything unhealthy about our way. We're pretty happy. We are mostly pretty open with each other as best friends.
02/10/2011
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A fantasy is just that a fantasy over the years we have shared many a few even have become real.
Originally posted by
SexSay
If you have a secret fantasy that your partner may not approve of do you share it with them? This is a question that I had to ask myself once, and to me it really determines the type of relationship you may have with them.
02/10/2011
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I share everything with my wife
Originally posted by
SexSay
If you have a secret fantasy that your partner may not approve of do you share it with them? This is a question that I had to ask myself once, and to me it really determines the type of relationship you may have with them.
02/10/2011
It depends. If they might fulfill it? Definitely. But I also have superweird fantasies which are impossible to satisfy, so... I don't see the point in that.
02/11/2011
My partner and I talk about it all. What we like, what we wanna try, even if he tells me a idea im not ok with I tell him that, and why. Some times thing are not out of the question but just not right now. I always new his naughty side was more naughtier then mine, but by talking about stuff I have opened up and tried things which has brought us closer. We find it more easy to text each other about little things we like or didnt like about our sex time while he is at work. That also makes it fun when he gets home and we learn about each other.
Some people find it hard to actually speak the words of our fantasies and likes/dislikes. I am one of those people but we have figured out a way.
Some people find it hard to actually speak the words of our fantasies and likes/dislikes. I am one of those people but we have figured out a way.
02/11/2011
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Yea I have shared with him. He takes it as it is and nothing more. He knows I wont pursue it
Originally posted by
SexSay
If you have a secret fantasy that your partner may not approve of do you share it with them? This is a question that I had to ask myself once, and to me it really determines the type of relationship you may have with them.
02/11/2011
We have a very open and comfortable relationship to speak about things
02/11/2011
Total posts: 52
Unique posters: 44
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