Making your Man more open to exploration...

The New Intimacy

Making your Man more open to exploration...

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Contributor: Phoenix Fire Phoenix Fire
I'm currently dating a guy who is great in bed! He's big, I mean bordering 9ins with quite a girth big and can last forever, even after he cums, he's ready to go in under a minute! I know this may be hard to believe but it's true, and I couldn't be more lucky to have found a guy like this in the sex dept!

My concern is that he may not be as into exploring sex as I am and that's a problem. I recently had health issues which drastically brought down my libido and perhaps took a toll on our sex life (seeing as we started dating in the midst of all these and they lasted a while). He continuously asks me about anal but when it comes to me looking at toys online it's almost like he becomes a shy child that shouldn't be looking at them. There's also no ease when it comes to transitioning into sex... half the time when he initiates I want to laugh.

I want to have a sexual relationship where the transition is easy, where he's excited to try out a new toy, where he questions what we'll be doing next and how. I know I've had my limitations and I shouldn't expect too much too soon but its just odd how he reacts most of the time. Any advice from the ladies and gents out there?
02/21/2010
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Contributor: deceased deceased
Alot of men are not into toys (unless it comes from the Sears Home Repair dept or Home Depot) until someone actually introduces it to their hands. Being a man means you feel you are born with the equipment you need to satisfy a man or another woman and you shouldn't need "accessories". Women like accessories. So you have to be the one who introduces a toy be it rope, paints, a harness, a cockring, etc, into the relationship. I may not be a woman, but I was introduced to toys by one .
02/21/2010
Contributor: SexyTigerX SexyTigerX
Quote:
Originally posted by deceased
Alot of men are not into toys (unless it comes from the Sears Home Repair dept or Home Depot) until someone actually introduces it to their hands. Being a man means you feel you are born with the equipment you need to satisfy a man or another woman ... more
That's so perfect!

This is exactly how I'm introducing things to my hubby. So far so good.
02/22/2010
Contributor: HerselfTheElf HerselfTheElf
I've found that when introducing a shy guy to toys, the simpler the better. Start out with something very girly in appearance. Therefore, it doesn't look like anything that could "replace" him. Then give him his own private show on how to use it on you.
02/22/2010
Contributor: Liz2 Liz2
For me it was a long process. Yes, at first he thought he was inadequate that I used toys. Eventually he enjoyed watching me use them. He then got around to choosing a toy for me to use, even lubes it.....
For use on him, they at first had to be almost totally unrealistic like the Raquel dil for me to peg him. He did come around, now he sometimes buys toys for me when he travels. Be patient...
02/22/2010
Contributor: Illusional Illusional
Like most others have said, the men aren't too fond of the toys initially. The thought of not being "as good" is a major fear. I started off, by making little videos while he was at work, some dirty pictures just to show how nice they can feel.. and during intercourse when we first started using them, I'd enjoy the toys be beg for his cock inside of me.. you know.. to let him know that the real throbbing flesh is the real deal! Which it is.. but sometimes they need to be reassured. It's always scary for me to bring up something new.
02/23/2010
Contributor: Phoenix Fire Phoenix Fire
thanks everyone this has been really helpful. i just got a few things in the mail and my guy saw the box and almost recoiled away... I couldn't help but laugh to myself. I don't even expect him to use vibrators or dildos with me but anal toys and even the wireless remote controlled ones I feel could be sooo much fun. Its just funny to me that he can sit there and ask me about anal and if i want to do it but that's where he'll stop. I'm going to start trying to introduce him to toys, slowly!
02/23/2010