In the last 6 months my wife an I have really started trying new things in the bedroom. Im very interested in couples play or a threesome MFM or FMF. Im 90% sure my wife will not be interested in it, but she has gotten on line with me once to try and chat with another couple.
Should I ask my wife if she has any interest in a threesome or playing with another couple
I would try to make conversation of it first before asking. See if she has any desire for a threesome. Perhaps it's a fantasy of hers, but perhaps it's just that, only a fantasy and not something she would want to ever engage in. If it is something she is against, even slightly, it would be inconsiderate to even request.
For me personally,if there are things I feel my partner should already know how I feel or believe on whatever the topic (based on prior conversations, etc.) I can get defensive if I feel a question is out of line and the usual attitude response on my part would be, "why would you even ask/say that?" and instant conflict, which is what you don't want.
Be gentle and respectful since it can be a sensitive topic. However, if she seems intrigued that's great. Then perhaps a few days or a week later you can be like "oh..ya know, I was thinking... remember when we talked about a threesome...well.." and go from there!
For me personally,if there are things I feel my partner should already know how I feel or believe on whatever the topic (based on prior conversations, etc.) I can get defensive if I feel a question is out of line and the usual attitude response on my part would be, "why would you even ask/say that?" and instant conflict, which is what you don't want.
Be gentle and respectful since it can be a sensitive topic. However, if she seems intrigued that's great. Then perhaps a few days or a week later you can be like "oh..ya know, I was thinking... remember when we talked about a threesome...well.." and go from there!
08/21/2011
If you're 90% sure she won't be into it then it's a good idea to be very careful with how you ask. So long as she's not left feeling pressured, inadequate, confused, hurt or scared then it shouldn't be an issue. I'm going to assume that with you being married there is a level of trust within the relationship - as such that's something you won't want to toy with. I'd personally start the conversation by asking about her fantasys, things she might not have ever said to anyone before, then when the conversation is open and there isn't any tension bring up your fantasy. So long as she knows you're not looking to replace her or do it without her she shouldn't react too badly.
08/22/2011
This is going to seriously depend on her confidence level.
1. Is she self concious about her body?
2. Has there ever been anything in her past that this type of play may trigger a bad feeling or uneasy feeling?
3. How secure are you both in your relationship?
I think that this sort of thing CAN (not always though) invite a lot of negativity into a relationship IF you're not secure with each other, your relationship or yourselves. If there has been ANY issue in the past, I would definitely leave it alone until it comes up in convo. Maybe try to sway the convo towards trying something like this, but don't suggest it.
Also, do you have anyone in particular in mind? If so, how comfortable is she with these people? Will she feel as though you like so-n-so better or maybe that you have underlying feelings for this person?
This is something that needs to be handled delicately, depending on your wife and your relationship.
1. Is she self concious about her body?
2. Has there ever been anything in her past that this type of play may trigger a bad feeling or uneasy feeling?
3. How secure are you both in your relationship?
I think that this sort of thing CAN (not always though) invite a lot of negativity into a relationship IF you're not secure with each other, your relationship or yourselves. If there has been ANY issue in the past, I would definitely leave it alone until it comes up in convo. Maybe try to sway the convo towards trying something like this, but don't suggest it.
Also, do you have anyone in particular in mind? If so, how comfortable is she with these people? Will she feel as though you like so-n-so better or maybe that you have underlying feelings for this person?
This is something that needs to be handled delicately, depending on your wife and your relationship.
Feb 6, 12:22 pm
Quote:
You know her best but I say forget it lol unless you know she wouldn't be offended. I would be pissed to be honest. But that is just me.
Originally posted by
extrafun
In the last 6 months my wife an I have really started trying new things in the bedroom. Im very interested in couples play or a threesome MFM or FMF. Im 90% sure my wife will not be interested in it, but she has gotten on line with me once to try and
...
In the last 6 months my wife an I have really started trying new things in the bedroom. Im very interested in couples play or a threesome MFM or FMF. Im 90% sure my wife will not be interested in it, but she has gotten on line with me once to try and chat with another couple.
Feb 8, 8:59 am
Openness and communication are key. Ask her what her feelings are about it, whether she'd be open to the idea and whether she'd feel more comfortable with MFM or FMF.
There are many women who feel insecure at the idea of bringing another woman into the bedroom, probably because of fears that the male partner will feel more attracted to the new lover. Though, I'm sure that insecurity happens with males as well. Like I said, openness is key.
There are many women who feel insecure at the idea of bringing another woman into the bedroom, probably because of fears that the male partner will feel more attracted to the new lover. Though, I'm sure that insecurity happens with males as well. Like I said, openness is key.
Feb 8, 9:12 am
Quote:
Ask away, You have nothing to loose.
Originally posted by
extrafun
In the last 6 months my wife an I have really started trying new things in the bedroom. Im very interested in couples play or a threesome MFM or FMF. Im 90% sure my wife will not be interested in it, but she has gotten on line with me once to try and
...
In the last 6 months my wife an I have really started trying new things in the bedroom. Im very interested in couples play or a threesome MFM or FMF. Im 90% sure my wife will not be interested in it, but she has gotten on line with me once to try and chat with another couple.
Feb 8, 9:57 am
Quote:
If it interests you then you should mention it but be prepared for the possibility that she will say no. You need to already know what your reaction will be to that answer. Is it a 'deal breaker' or just something you think might be fun? It is much more important how you handle a no that how you handle a yes....because after the initial shock, if you have remained positive and no threatening she might admit to being curious. Even then you should always be ready with what you will do if she balks. Is she worth it to never have this experience?
Originally posted by
extrafun
In the last 6 months my wife an I have really started trying new things in the bedroom. Im very interested in couples play or a threesome MFM or FMF. Im 90% sure my wife will not be interested in it, but she has gotten on line with me once to try and
...
In the last 6 months my wife an I have really started trying new things in the bedroom. Im very interested in couples play or a threesome MFM or FMF. Im 90% sure my wife will not be interested in it, but she has gotten on line with me once to try and chat with another couple.
Feb 8, 1:08 pm
There's a fine line between fantasy and reality. I would try to bring it up as part of an overall discussion of fantasies and see if it's hers. Most likely she has thought of threesomes before, but probably with two men just as often as two women. So, be prepared to talk about both with her if you talk about it at all.
Feb 8, 1:15 pm
Quote:
Does she enjoy watching MFM or FMF porn? I at first thought it was something I would never do, but I have done it both ways. I actually think I enjoyed FMF more....I know my husband did. It was a real turn on for me to see him with another woman going down on him. He however did not like seeing another man touching me in any way....maybe you need to make sure you can both deal with any jealousy issues that may arise.
Originally posted by
extrafun
In the last 6 months my wife an I have really started trying new things in the bedroom. Im very interested in couples play or a threesome MFM or FMF. Im 90% sure my wife will not be interested in it, but she has gotten on line with me once to try and
...
In the last 6 months my wife an I have really started trying new things in the bedroom. Im very interested in couples play or a threesome MFM or FMF. Im 90% sure my wife will not be interested in it, but she has gotten on line with me once to try and chat with another couple.
Feb 15, 1:39 pm
There's only one way to find out. Seeing that she's been more open and receptive to new things, it might not bother her so much. Just make sure she knows she's still the focus of your life, and adding another partner (long term or just for a night) is just another thing to try and in no way means you love her less, or want her less.
Feb 15, 1:51 pm
Total posts:
24
Unique posters: 24
Unique posters: 24