Why oh why can't we do something fun once in a while!

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Why oh why can't we do something fun once in a while!

AnnRob AnnRob
My husband and I have been married for 51 years now, and for the most part things have been great. I haven't had many complaints, and we enjoy each other's company.

The only problem I have found is that he never wants to leave the house! We are both retired and live on a fixed income, so it isn't like I want to go out on a cruise or go on an expensive vacation, but a dinner at Burger King or going out dancing once in a while would be nice!

When money is involved he always says that we don't have the money for it and that is understandable. When our daughter offers to pay for it, he will just fall back on "what would you wanna do that for?" when I ask about dancing or going out and having fun.

He is a lot like his father was, the very antisocial type who doesn't like crowds. I try and find settings that will be fun for both of us, but honestly I feel like "fun" just isn't in his vocabulary!

Once, I wanted to go salsa dancing with him and he suggests I go by myself. When I asked who I would dance with he says that he's sure there will be other people there who don't have anyone to dance with!

It's very frustrating! Does anyone else have this issue, and if so, is there ANY solution? Or is it just a part of who he is and that will never change? I'm out of suggestions, but it's making me very depressed sitting around the house all of the time. I wish there was just a way I could convince him to go out and have fun! Once he's there, he always enjoys it, but GETTING him there is the challenge!
05/29/2012
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woodsdragon woodsdragon
Quote:
Originally posted by AnnRob
My husband and I have been married for 51 years now, and for the most part things have been great. I haven't had many complaints, and we enjoy each other's company.

The only problem I have found is that he never wants to leave the ...
I know that my age varies from yours a bit, but here are some ideas...

1.) Start a "saving account"...kind of like a piggy bank but for date. Toss change from your pocket or a few dollars every now and then. You would be surprised how fast it will add up. Call it your date fund. MY fiance parents got us a small safe (more like a toy really, but it has a lock and a combination) and labeled it with our names and then put vacation fund. We are using it to save up for our Honeymoon. If your daughter wanted to contribute, you could always just add it to the fund.

2.) Each of your write things you would like to do on small pieces of paper (each write the same amount, maybe 5 each for starters). Place them in a jar/hat and then take turns picking out pieces of paper and doing whatever it says. You could put a monetary limit on the date. Yes, it may mean you will need to sit at home and watch a movie, but when yours are picked you could be going dancing or out to eat

3.) Pick a night a week to be your date night. You could rotate weeks to plan it or help each other plan it.

4.) Maybe start by going and doing something he really likes (that maybe you necessarily don't). Reminding him that he likes getting out of the house might help.

5.) Find another couple or couples your age with similar interest in your area and go out together or have get togethers at each others houses. My best girlfriends and I are truly blessed because all of out husbands (well my fiance and their husbands) get along so well!!!

Hope this helps and I wish you the best of luck!

I saw that you have been married for 51 yeas, congratulations!! We are getting married in a few months, any tips you could share on how to keep a marriage successful?
06/03/2012
Total posts: 2
Unique posters: 2