Originally posted by
What are yalls thoughts on maybe getting her a stripper for her 40th birthday?
I second Inquisitor's comments. And clearly, based on the long length of my response, I have too much time on my hands, lol. Oh well, I wrote it, so I'll post it. Try not to mind me too much...
This is just my opinion/feelings, so please don't be put off...I would not recommend getting a stripper. Unless you know she is really appreciative of that, it could be risky and the last thing you want is an awkward situation for such a memorable milestone B-day. That's just not something I know that many women would really enjoy as a gift, let alone from their husband, that's all. (I also don't have a problem with it, so that's not coloring my response.) Now, if you were swingers and the stripper show could then segue into a threesome with said specially chosen performer (and consenting ahead of time, of course)...okay, not the average circumstance, lol. Nor do I get that vibe from your post here, but ya never know...hahaha. (I really don't judge that, it's just more like a plot line from some novel, eh?)
I think your thinking ahead of time and asking for suggestions shows how thoughtful you are! I would like to suggest the obvious, given where we are, and that's some sex toy purchase(s), or some lingerie?
I just had to suggest that, but I don't know if you both use sex toys. If you have, then by all means consider a purchase, not as the main gift, but just as something sexy and fun. If it's not the main gift, the pressure is off for her to love the toy and should keep it playful. Now, should you want suggestions about toys, well, I am sure more than a few, myself included, would be happy to help
What struck me right off was when you said: "She will be the hottest 40 I've ever seen" I don't know any woman who wouldn't be deeply touched to hear her hubby say that and clearly mean it! I agree with the other poster who said be sure to let her know that.
Being alone with no other outside obligations/distractio ns, removing her day-to-day hassles/worries (such as childcare, housework, whatever) frees up her time to not think of anything but the two of you! Sometimes the most thoughtful thing is letting her know (through your actions) that you see all she does and you want to pamper her a little and she won't have to bother with the usual grind. It doesn't have to be extravagant or expensive. Time off and interesting company with the man who's genuinely interested in her and has thought about what she likes and tried to deliver it...well, that's something I think most busy married women would appreciate. I am not saying not to go big. Just remember that those little details can really compound your results. It's not as fun to be whisked off to a little trip when you are worrying about all the things you still need to take care of back home and how you'll never be able to catch up with it before the next work day, etc. The idea is to remove the stresses you can, then move in with the special stuff.
Does you wife like parties and social activities, or is she more happy spending time alone with you, say going to a B&B? What interests does she have that you could surprise her with? OH&W Lovebears mentioned his wife likes jewelry and in such a case, taking her to select what she wants (or surprising her with it) and then having her wear it while you go out to enjoy dinner, dancing &/or a show (whatever you both like) might sound easy, but it's what she likes, so deliver what you can. It's the hubby who only slaps a hastily bought, limp, bargain-bin grocery store bouquet at the wife as he comes in the house and disappears into his man cave who doesn't do himself any favors. If he got her her favorite flowers, even at the grocery store, and presented them in a caring manner, that might be all she wants. It's feeling as if you're an afterthought and a burden that breaks a woman's heart. You're ahead of the game just in thinking about it and planning! Women often just need to know you notice them, really see them, appreciate & love them. The more you can articulate that with words and actions, the better, regardless of money. As someone else pointed out, she chose you. Remind her why you were such a good choice
Oh, good grief...I wrote an advice column! Sorry, I did not intend to be preachy, if that's how I came across. I think your wife is going to be happy with whatever you do and I wish you both a wonderful experience! Please, if you're comfortable with it, tell us what you decided to do and how it goes