Friends with your ex?

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Friends with your ex?

Thumper Logic Thumper Logic
Are any of you good friends (even verging on best friends) with an ex? If so, how does that work? My most recent ex still wants me to be one of his best friends, and I'm trying to come to grips with it...
09/20/2012
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Ansley Ansley
Not even remotely close to being friends with any of them and I would not be comfortable with my husband being friends with any of his.
09/20/2012
Sera26 Sera26
No, but none of the relationships ended vaguely well.
09/20/2012
EvilHomer EvilHomer
Nope, and I wouldn't be comfortable with a partner being close friends with an ex either.
09/20/2012
anonkitty anonkitty
Good friends, not best, but yup. It works only when we have both spent long enough time away from each other without any contact. I would say don't do it unless you're entirely comfortable with the idea.
09/20/2012
SMichelle SMichelle
Yes, I'm still friends with some of my exes. My partner is still friends with some of his, too. It doesn't bother either of us.

It did take me awhile to be friends with one specific exes. For a long time, it hurt being around him, because I didn't exactly want the bf/gf part of our relationship to be over. After a great deal of time away, we're now very good friends.
09/20/2012
married with children married with children
I am friends with them on FB, but we dont really talk much.
09/23/2012
Castielskitten Castielskitten
I was a friend to one, until he had a go at my sister (who is only 14 years old) telling her to go get herself a vibrator to fuck herself with. Needless to say, we haven't talked since. Her comeback was a good one.
"Go fuck yourself. Oh wait, you can't. You don't have a dick!"

That put a damper on his spirits. (He's only 4 inches)
09/23/2012
Aisling Aisling
I am with one of them but we never got very serious to begin with. I think with future ex's or ex's of my partner it'd really have to depend on the person and circumstances, I guess.
09/24/2012
LunaLuthor LunaLuthor
Quote:
Originally posted by Thumper Logic
Are any of you good friends (even verging on best friends) with an ex? If so, how does that work? My most recent ex still wants me to be one of his best friends, and I'm trying to come to grips with it...
Yes i am but we never had any intimacy
10/05/2012
Velocity Velocity
We were, then i dunno we don't talk very much anymore.
probably for the best though. i'm still kind of stuck on him. :/
11/07/2012
Pink Lily Pink Lily
I'm not good friends with any of my exes. At one point I used to be, but we went on a trip together and it was such a disaster we haven't spoken since. :/
11/08/2012
nikki0668 nikki0668
My first ex and I are very good friends, but the second one is complicated.
11/27/2012
Beaners Beaners
Nope. It usually ends pretty badly/explosively with my exes, and it's impossible to be friends. My ex from high school hasn't spoken to me since I graduated. My first ex from college and I can be civil, and he and I look out for each other when serious things happen in our lives. (He's reached out to me when each of my dogs died, I reached out to him when his dad died.) My second ex from college and I don't talk, and my third from college tried to sabotage all of my friendships with any of our mutual friends. Good times!
11/27/2012
Genderfree Genderfree
Oh yes, me and my ex are best friends, but I guess we're exes on weird terms!
12/10/2012
LeeBee LeeBee
There are a few that I'm friends with. My most recent, though we're still really awkward, so I don't know if I consider us friends yet, one from about three years ago, and one from four.
12/12/2012
woodsdragon woodsdragon
I have a few exs that I am still in contact with...don't know that I would use the word "friend" though
12/21/2012
PropertyOfPotter PropertyOfPotter
I have children with my ex husband, so I see him on a regular basis. We're on good terms, probably close to being friends.
12/21/2012
Trysexual Trysexual
Yes, with a few.
12/21/2012
phoenixfire phoenixfire
Uh, nope. I haven't spoken to any of my exes in more than a decade, and I don't think it would really work for me. (I don't have that many exes actually, but when it didn't work in my relationships it Didn't Work in a Big Way. I think I made some very poor choices of who to date back in the day.)
12/21/2012
spineyogurt spineyogurt
Nope
12/21/2012
Rod Ronald Rod Ronald
I've tried to be, but it gets weird after awhile.
12/21/2012
shorejen9 shorejen9
No I am not and I prefer it that way. They are ex's for a reason! My husband is friends with some of his but so am I. I'm fine with it as its just pure friendship and the relationship was silly high school stuff.
12/21/2012
kkizzee05 kkizzee05
Quote:
Originally posted by Thumper Logic
Are any of you good friends (even verging on best friends) with an ex? If so, how does that work? My most recent ex still wants me to be one of his best friends, and I'm trying to come to grips with it...
I am friends with two of my exs. Our relationships were not serious and fun, so breaking up because we liked each other as friend more than lovers was the best way to go. I find it nice because they know more about you than what others may know, depending...
12/21/2012
JG24FanUK JG24FanUK
I'm not friends with any of mine. The most recent one I still see most days of the week, but we do not speak.
01/29/2013
doowop doowop
I'm friends with one of my exes, but the relationship was during our teen years when I was very confused about my sexuality. Now it's pretty much a distant memory that we kinda laugh about.

In all of my relationships except that one, I've been the dumpee. And all of my other exes have eventually come back to try to reconcile, and I inevitably rejected them. Later on, we'd try friendship, but there was a lot of animosity in most of them because I rejected them (ha, and yet they dumped me), so we just couldn't. I've since given up on the notion. It sounds weird, but I see this as a common trend among all of my exes since the first.

It's sad realizing that someone you once loved so much is just a stranger now. I hope one day I can at least be acquaintances with most of my exes because I am a very caring and forgiving person, but for now it's just not healthy for me. Even an ex from 4 years ago thinks she can make calls on my life and what I do wrong. We recently tried to be friends once more, but I had to distance myself again.
01/30/2013
LadyRelentless LadyRelentless
All of the lovers that I've had have been absolutely amazing human beings. Just because I no longer want to spend *all* of my time with them, doesn't mean I want to cut them out of my life forever just for not being the perfect match to my crazy self.

I find it usually takes a little time of separation before the friendship can start again. It's not like you can be bestfriendlovers, drop the lover part and keep going exactly as you were.
01/30/2013
Crystal2013 Crystal2013
Quote:
Originally posted by Thumper Logic
Are any of you good friends (even verging on best friends) with an ex? If so, how does that work? My most recent ex still wants me to be one of his best friends, and I'm trying to come to grips with it...
I am friends with my ex husband but not my ex boyfriend. I will be happy never seeing my ex boyfriend again. As the old saying goes if I see him again it will be too soon. This might sound weird but my ex husband is now more like an older brother. when I told him I joined a free dating site first thing he said was nobody that drinks! He knows the emotional and physical abuse my ex boyfriend gave me because of his drinking. My ex husband emails pictures of my dog and cat since I gave them to him because they were my pets.
02/19/2013
Missy27 Missy27
I have been. Not currently but I definitely think its possible and good, especially if your relationship started from a friendship.
02/21/2013
Shortietomboy235 Shortietomboy235
Quote:
Originally posted by Thumper Logic
Are any of you good friends (even verging on best friends) with an ex? If so, how does that work? My most recent ex still wants me to be one of his best friends, and I'm trying to come to grips with it...
I'm in the same exact position. I'm simply trying to take it a day at a time and it gets easier. But you do need your time to cope and get over it. And if he really wants to be your friend he will allow you that time.
02/21/2013
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Total posts: 33
Unique posters: 33