Keep in Touch With the Family?

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Keep in Touch With the Family?

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Contributor: Envy Envy
I'm wondering about this because I am getting mixed views.

When you break up with an ex, do you keep in touch with the ex's family?

My ex cheated on and left me for another girl, then basically ran off from home with her and ditched everyone, including his own family. I still keep in touch with his family though, they love me dearly and really hoped I would have become their DIL. I love them, too, and they're like a second family and we've only gotten closer since the breakup. However a few of my friends told me I should cut all ties, including the ties with his family. My dad's gf, however, is still great friends with one of her son's exes, so I know it's possible.

What do you guys do? Do you cut all ties or keep in touch?
07/04/2011
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Contributor: Dusk Dusk
When my ex ended things with me, I kept in touch with his mother a bit and his grandma a LOT since she had practically adopted me and she and my mother and I go out to movies and things when we can. I just see them as people I would keep in touch with outside of that relationship. Just because he ruined one thing doesn't mean I have to let him ruin everything.
07/04/2011
Contributor: Jul!a Jul!a
While I haven't kept in touch with any of my ex's families, I don't see anything wrong with it either. If you're close with his family and they're close with you and you all still want to talk, I don't see why you can't. Especially if your ex has run off with somebody else and doesn't even talk to his own family anymore. I can see where some of your friends are coming from, and I've told my sister the same thing. But the reason I told my sister to cut off contact with her ex's family was because she'd keep getting roped back into her ex who was horrible for her. If you're not going to get caught in a bad cycle, go ahead and keep talking to his family.
07/04/2011
Contributor: P'Gell P'Gell
I've been married a long time, and pray I never have to worry about an "ex." But, in the past, I found that when something ended, making a Clean Break was the best. Staying in contact with the family is not only painful, but it causes problems with holidays, when either member of the couple finds an other lover, and causes stress in both families.

A Christmas card might be nice, but aside from that, clean breaks are best. Unless there are grandkids involved, then you have to make nice and keep them around.

No kids, no contact, so healing can be most uneventful and fast. IMO, keeping "in touch" with the family only delays healthy moving on and healing.
07/04/2011
Contributor: MN58 MN58
Well I don't see any problem with you keeping in touch with your ex's family. It's not like you're still talking with him or anything so there's nothing wrong with it at all. Getting rid of people isn't easy especially affter being so close to them.
BUT it might be a good idea to first get over your ex and let your self heal. So I think the communication between you and his family should be minimal for a while. Just for your emotional well being ofcourse.
07/04/2011
Contributor: Envy Envy
Thanks you guys.

Yes I am keeping it minimal. Most of the time I'm the one being contacted, asking how I am, how's my dad, etc. Just a general "How are you holding up, what's new?" kinda deal as well as contact for birthdays and holidays.
07/05/2011