Warning - Rant Ahead

Chilipepper Chilipepper
I hate being single.

I mean, yeah, there's nobody there to consult and get in the way and all that other annoying crap. But I freaking miss being held and having affection. And not the type you get from family and friends, but the type that covers everything - either it can be an end in itself or can lead to other things. I crave touch and I am starved for affection. I don't know whether it's the stress from school or the lack of libido or the ten months of celibacy or what ... all I know is that I'm lonely right now, and vulnerable enough to get into trouble if I act on it.
01/16/2011
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Emma (Girl With Fire) Emma (Girl With Fire)
Quote:
Originally posted by Chilipepper
I hate being single.

I mean, yeah, there's nobody there to consult and get in the way and all that other annoying crap. But I freaking miss being held and having affection. And not the type you get from family and friends, but the type ... More
Aww, I am so sorry. I love you Chili. I am only 6ish months into celibacy and i do know how you feel. Luckily for me I have two small children who keep me distracted most of the time, and who are small enough that I can let them fall asleep in my bed and move them to their own. This means I get a ton of cuddles. Just not adult cuddles, I really want to be able to hold onto somebody for more than 30 second intervals. I am still at the point where all I can think about is the second they open their mouth and I have to deal with them. So that helps.

I hope that you get through this without too many mistakes. One or two wont hurt ya as long as you are careful, but if you are determined to be by yourself for a while, as I know I am, just make sure it's what you really want.

Lots of love hun!
01/16/2011
kinky girlfriend kinky girlfriend
Quote:
Originally posted by Chilipepper
I hate being single.

I mean, yeah, there's nobody there to consult and get in the way and all that other annoying crap. But I freaking miss being held and having affection. And not the type you get from family and friends, but the type ... More
ya I never thought I would find someone...It was very lonely I wouldn't do the friends with benefits either....Yea I wanted sex too...I didn't date until 19 because I never found someone I trusted enough and such.I can understand.I couldn't imagine being without him now. I still get lonely some days because not every week I get to spend time with him...some weeks twice a week outside work. I know more than you or peole with long distance relationships but until it becomes my situation I'm not used to that so thats why I still get lonely especially when he takes a whole month vacation.

I don't know what you should do but if it happened to me I would watch more porn,read sexy books and buy some stuff off eden
01/16/2011
Alys Alys
Quote:
Originally posted by Chilipepper
I hate being single.

I mean, yeah, there's nobody there to consult and get in the way and all that other annoying crap. But I freaking miss being held and having affection. And not the type you get from family and friends, but the type ... More
I'm about a year and a half into being celibate myself, and I understand entirely what you mean about missing that touch of a lover, the permission to snuggle into his/her side and know that you will be cuddled back. I'm sure that it is the most difficult thing about being single/celibate, and I have found that, honestly, it hasn't gotten better for me with time. For a while I even considered going back to my ex who had cheated on me and made me feel like nothing I did made me worthy of his undivided attention, ever. I've found that throwing myself into my interests (cooking, my friends and family, reading...) helps me fend off the feeling of overwhelming loneliness. (A few good orgasms before bed helps flood the brain with all those happy-feeling-inducing chemicals, and a good pity-party complete with my favorite ice cream has made the worst seem far more manageable).
01/17/2011
markeagleone markeagleone
Quote:
Originally posted by Chilipepper
I hate being single.

I mean, yeah, there's nobody there to consult and get in the way and all that other annoying crap. But I freaking miss being held and having affection. And not the type you get from family and friends, but the type ... More
from a guys point of view, stay true to yourself physical wants cant lead the heart youll find what you need when youre ready i know how it feels to want ones arms around you
01/17/2011
Illusional Illusional
Quote:
Originally posted by Chilipepper
I hate being single.

I mean, yeah, there's nobody there to consult and get in the way and all that other annoying crap. But I freaking miss being held and having affection. And not the type you get from family and friends, but the type ... More
*Hugs, hugs and more hugs*

I hope you will find some affection, and soon from a decent guy.
I don't want you to get hurt or anything, but we're always here to talk.

You're an amazing, kickass strong person. I think somebody will notice besides us.
01/17/2011
Gunsmoke Gunsmoke
After my divorce I forced myself to be single for 1 year to make sure there would be no 'rebound' relationships. I think it was one of the smarter things I've ever done. I didn't find the love of my life for another 10 years - but those 10 years were great fun with friends, travel, beach, skiing & parties. During that time I had plenty of close relationships - I never slept around - sort of serial monogamy.

Good luck - when I stopped looking for a mate, I found one!
01/17/2011
Chevylady37 Chevylady37
have you considered internet dating?
01/17/2011
Chilipepper Chilipepper
Thank you, everyone, for understanding where I'm coming from. *hugs all*

Now, to actually do something to keep busy.
01/17/2011
Jobthingy Jobthingy
*HUGE HUGS*

I wish I was close to you just so I could snuggle you at night or something.

I have been there and i know the feeling. It sucks.

He will come along. Just don't settle for the first good thing only to find out it was a horrible mistake.
01/17/2011
zeebot zeebot
I'm single and have been for ages, but luckily all my friends are super cuddly, so I get my fill of touching.
01/25/2011
markeagleone markeagleone
Quote:
Originally posted by Chilipepper
I hate being single.

I mean, yeah, there's nobody there to consult and get in the way and all that other annoying crap. But I freaking miss being held and having affection. And not the type you get from family and friends, but the type ... More
Don't act on it. Wait for things to be right all around, before you act. Things could be made up to get to the end point and you would have so much more hurt living a lie.
01/27/2011
TiffySmilez TiffySmilez
Quote:
Originally posted by Chilipepper
I hate being single.

I mean, yeah, there's nobody there to consult and get in the way and all that other annoying crap. But I freaking miss being held and having affection. And not the type you get from family and friends, but the type ... More
I haven't been in a relationship in almost 6 years and believe me it's torture. I've come close to making massive errors in judgement (i.e. sleeping with close friends and virtual strangers just to have some sort of human contact, no matter hoow brief) but the end result is always the same. At the very last second I have a moment of clarity when I see the truth about that person and I discover something about myself. Try to stay strong and find an effective distraction.
03/09/2011
Stasha Stasha
Sometimes I love being single, and sometimes I hate it. I agree, I miss cuddling, especially when it's cold! I miss having someone to talk to about everything. But at the same time, I can be selfish, and my free time is mine to do what I want with it. I mean, when I had a boyfriend he got really bored spending 3+ hours in Barnes & Noble.
03/09/2011
SoBlue SoBlue
Well, what i did was i found way to keep my mind busy so i wasn't dwelling on it, makes coping a bit easier... I tie hemp, and Frisbee golf, but i did it with friends so in the end, i wasn't truly alone.
04/05/2011
Total posts: 15
Unique posters: 13