What to do with Dildos?

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What to do with Dildos?

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Contributor: trios trios
After about a few years of trying to get my wife to use different dildos, she continues to show disinterest with all but 1. So basically, I have 4 others that we don't use because they are either way too big, too hard, or the head is too big.

Should I keep them for future use, or get rid of them?
If I get rid of them should I give them away to EF fans? Maybe a contest? (would rather do that than try to sell them on EBay or something- no fun in that).
Lastly I was thinking of creating a hybrid between Vixskin (outer) and inner cyberskin. Wouldn't that be cool? But I may destroy them during the experiment.

So, with your help to decide the fate of my friends...
Answers (private voting - your screen name will NOT appear in the results):
Keep them, she may change her mind later. (like in 100 years)
68  (70%)
EF contest/give away!
8  (8%)
Experiment with the cyberskin core and vixskin outer...
17  (18%)
other
4  (4%)
Total votes: 97
Poll is closed
11/27/2010
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Contributor: Jessica Elizabeth Jessica Elizabeth
Honestly? I'd do whatever you wanted with the ones she doesn't like - your experiment or swap/sell if they are 100% sterlizable.

Then, I'd figure out the qualities she likes in the 1 dildo she enjoys and then get a couple others that are similar to that one so you'll have some variety but keep to the same things she likes.
11/27/2010
Contributor: leatherlover leatherlover
I would buy maybe a separate storage container, like a plastic shoe case, and put them in there. Maybe one day they will come out again in some way.
11/27/2010
Contributor: cherryredhead88 cherryredhead88
You could keep them for a while longer to see if she changes her mind, but if you've already had them for a while I would say go ahead and experiment!

If they are fully sterilizable, there is this thing called toyswap that I have heard of, but I am not sure how to find it.
11/27/2010
Contributor: lamira lamira
I would definitely keep them, you never know, she may change her mind, and it would be a shame to waste your money if she does change her mind and you have thrown them out.
11/27/2010
Contributor: ToyGeek ToyGeek
I don't think cutting them up is the best plan ever, but if you do cut them up, make sure to take pictures!
11/28/2010
Contributor: DeliciousSurprise DeliciousSurprise
It would depend on what they're made of... If it's a silicone toy or something nonporous, what can it hurt to hold onto them? If they're of a porous material and they've been used I'd probably toss them just in case.
11/28/2010
Contributor: Shellz31 Shellz31
I'd keep them around. Ya taste changes over time and maybe she will decide one day that she likes one of them ... or hopefully all.
11/28/2010
Contributor: KnK KnK
Can you sell used toys on ebay? I think that it might be against their selling practices.

I do know, however that if you want to sell anything questionable, or pre-used, that you can sell it here:

link

You can, for instanc, buy a looooot of used ladies panties (etc.) on this site. It's an interesting look at the very least. -grins-
11/28/2010
Contributor: KnK KnK
Quote:
Originally posted by KnK
Can you sell used toys on ebay? I think that it might be against their selling practices.

I do know, however that if you want to sell anything questionable, or pre-used, that you can sell it here:

link

You can, for instanc, buy a ... more
Oh, and then there's this one too,

link
11/28/2010
Contributor: ScottA ScottA
Silicone can't be easily modified after it is cured, so I wouldn't bother with that. At the minimum you'll destroy the toy.

Keep if there's a chance she'll like them (you can try them out too and see if you like them), and if they are good and 100% sterilizable go ahead and give them away. I'd be interested in a large VixSkin
11/28/2010
Contributor: Gunsmoke Gunsmoke
I voted keep them - my wife's taste regularly. It depends on what your gal doesn't like. If they are just too large - maybe you should have the give-a-way raffle.

If she just has a preference for the current favorite - you may be able to work them into your repertoire after a while. We alternate between me picking out the toys for the evening - then she does. That gives me chance to see what she likes (and when - time of the month matters) and gives her a chance to experience new things that I pick.

Have fun and good luck.

BTW - if you're batting 1 for 5 - maybe that means you are buying for you and not her. For future purchases the primary consideration should be what she likes.
11/28/2010
Contributor: trios trios
Quote:
Originally posted by Gunsmoke
I voted keep them - my wife's taste regularly. It depends on what your gal doesn't like. If they are just too large - maybe you should have the give-a-way raffle.

If she just has a preference for the current favorite - you may be able ... more
Thanks for your post gunsmoke!

Some of them are too big she says, but she hasn't really let them in all the way (tried once with each one). try again in the future?

One reason why we have so many is that she refused to use a vegetable to see what size is ideal for her (no food in the bed as toys!). She is very picky about a whole lot of things all right!

Overall, she still is reluctant to use dildos/dongs because they are not 'real'. BUT (the big but here), she does acknowledge that her orgasms are stronger with the use of dildo/dong and stimultaneous oral on her, so she is usually okay with it when I suggest to include her fav.

I like the you pick-she picks method. Will try that out!

Also, I will contribute to EF by having her discuss what she likes/doesnt like about each toy before giving them away and writing a short review on them.

I guess I am looking for her satisfaction (love her loud moans), so in terms of that, I bought them for me too!
11/28/2010
Contributor: Gunsmoke Gunsmoke
Quote:
Originally posted by trios
Thanks for your post gunsmoke!

Some of them are too big she says, but she hasn't really let them in all the way (tried once with each one). try again in the future?

One reason why we have so many is that she refused to use a ... more
Trios - my wife's tastes have evolved a lot over time. If left to her own devices the choices would be fairly small and plain. It was my sense of experimentation that lead us to what are now her favorites - things like glass wands, the Pure Wand, rabbits, etc.

I have a couple of dildos that are tapered. As she becomes more aroused she'll take them deeper - and the taper stretches her some - then I'll insert one of the larger toys. She has really learned to like the full feeling of the larger toys - but needs the warm up.

The best one we tried was the silicone Champlette link. The vibe is worthless but the dildo is great. We also have the Champ (the big brother of the Chemplette). The Champ is not sold by EF - but it goes up to 2" at the base and is a great warm-up for the O2 Revolution link.I've pretty much retired the Champlette and go right to the Champ!
11/28/2010
Contributor: trios trios
Quote:
Originally posted by Gunsmoke
Trios - my wife's tastes have evolved a lot over time. If left to her own devices the choices would be fairly small and plain. It was my sense of experimentation that lead us to what are now her favorites - things like glass wands, the Pure Wand, ... more
'She has really learned to like the full feeling of the larger toys - but needs the warm up.'

Does she do this because you ask to use it, or is she asking for it first now? (My wife will do it with my insistence, and I wonder if she will turn around one day and ask for it first?!)

'I've pretty much retired the Champlette and go right to the Champ!'

Should I buy even another dildo? If you really feel strongly that it will help, will do so (I value wisdom, plus your wife sounds like she is just like my wife). Just don't want to have another thing to give away...

Lastly, how long does it take for your wife to warm up? We have a sleeping baby in the room that wakes periodically, and sometimes time is of essence!
11/28/2010
Contributor: Gunsmoke Gunsmoke
Quote:
Originally posted by trios
'She has really learned to like the full feeling of the larger toys - but needs the warm up.'

Does she do this because you ask to use it, or is she asking for it first now? (My wife will do it with my insistence, and I wonder if she ... more
As you probably know mood and hormones mean that the landscape is continually changing. We have dozens of toys for that reason. I'll choose a few toys of various shapes and sizes and bring them to bed. 99% of the time we use the toys to bring her to an orgasm or two before going on to intercourse (or maybe a BJ).

Given a choice she would rarely choose a larger dildo (but it has happened) - she's a little embarrassed to ask for a big one. But 90% of the time if I use the larger toys she loves the feeling. About 10% - she'll just ask me to go with something smaller.

I buy more toys for several reasons;
My wife has indicated some special feature of a toy she likes - and look for something that has that feature.
I like adventure and my wife now knows that when I buy new things - she gets to experience new and different paths to orgasm
Materials and shapes are always changing - as are our evolving tastes - pardon the cliche; 'variety is the spice of life'

Ah the dilema of children - getting them out of the bedroom is going to be the first - but not last challenge. My 19 year old is back from college - talking about moving back in. My wife loves him to death - but does not welcome having to worry about him him hearing her now more vocal orgasms in the next room.

Honestly the 'warm-up' time is rather extended and with a baby right next to us, my wife could not relax at all. Kudo's to your gal for trying. Being attuned to her level of arousal requires all your senses - observing her nipples (candle light required) listening to her breathing, sensing her level of lubrication are all clues to how she's doing.

I tend to go slowly because its better for her to be 'begging' for more, than for me to go to quickly. One key sign for me is when she begins pressing her hips towards my thrusts - this tells me that she's looking for me to go deeper, past her g-spot to her a-spot. The a-spot is the key to her being able to have a vaginal orgasm and to 'gush'. The a-spot is sometimes called the AFE Zone link

Once your wife discovers she has an a-spot, she'll learn the value of larger toys and deeper penetration.

Good luck and enjoy the journey - there will be more challenges and victories. Your doing good when she tells you that you know her body better than she does - that's the best compliment my wife ever gave me!
11/28/2010
Contributor: Selective Sensualist Selective Sensualist
Quote:
Originally posted by trios
Thanks for your post gunsmoke!

Some of them are too big she says, but she hasn't really let them in all the way (tried once with each one). try again in the future?

One reason why we have so many is that she refused to use a ... more
I would think that trying a dildo only once, when she is worrying about your baby in the next room and is thus not fully relaxed, is not enough experimentation to rule out its potential effectiveness for her. There are many toys that I keep on reserve to enjoy when I have time for more leisurely sessions to become more deeply relaxed. During these types of sessions, I find that I crave more than what my tried-and-true "quickie" toys can deliver.

I love the toys that I only work up to occasionally just as much as the quickie toys that I use almost daily. I would have a huge gap in my toy collection if I ditched every toy that did not work for me the first time I tried. Many toys that did not work the first time for me have actually come to be amongst my favorites.

My advice is to keep them in a safe place and don't push them on her. She will feel intimidated and stressed -- and will NOT relax enough to enjoy them. Hopefully one of these days you will get some much-deserved "alone time" together to enjoy a more leisurely session. (Perhaps grandma could occasionally babysit when your baby is older?) If she becomes very aroused, THAT is the time to try switching from your tried-and-true toy to trying one of the others that are perhaps more filling (or have a more extreme curve, a harder material, or whatever feature is different). Always start out with the toy that she is most comfortable with and ONLY suggest something new when she is really relaxed and already aroused.
11/29/2010
Contributor: ToyGeek ToyGeek
Quote:
Originally posted by Selective Sensualist
I would think that trying a dildo only once, when she is worrying about your baby in the next room and is thus not fully relaxed, is not enough experimentation to rule out its potential effectiveness for her. There are many toys that I keep on ... more
Excellent advice! Very few things feel good when you're rushed and distracted.
11/29/2010
Contributor: trios trios
Quote:
Originally posted by Selective Sensualist
I would think that trying a dildo only once, when she is worrying about your baby in the next room and is thus not fully relaxed, is not enough experimentation to rule out its potential effectiveness for her. There are many toys that I keep on ... more
thanks! I guess I'll keep them for a while and see what happens...
12/10/2010
Contributor: ScottA ScottA
I have a number of toys that took a while for me to really like as well. Trying things more than once is important (provided she's OK with it).
12/10/2010
Contributor: cobiffle cobiffle
I would say keep the ones that she does not hate completely. If there is any that she complete hates then get rid of it or sell it.
03/30/2011
Contributor: SexyStuff SexyStuff
Keep them or put them in a nice basket with a ribbon and deliver to the neighbors.
03/30/2011
Contributor: jankit jankit
I love a good contest or giveaway provided you can 100 percent clean the toy.
04/01/2011
Contributor: Lithaewyn Lithaewyn
It really seems like your tastes aren't matching up. Since your intent is to buy for her, sit down and actually have a serious conversation about what she wants in a dildo. If she doesn't know, let her sit down and surf EF and give her time to absorb things. Or, you could compare the dildo she likes to those she doesn't.

It really seems from what you've said that size is an issue. Listen to your wife. If she says the dildo is too big, it's too big. I can tell without fully inserting a toy if it's the right size or not, and surely she can probably tell too. I would feel very frustrated and pressured if my husband was pushing toys on me that were uncomfortable; I'm a petite woman and hate big dildos.

As far as keeping the toys, it depends on your wife's personality. So far in playing with toys for two years a toy is either a hit, miss, or "meh". I have no attachment to toys that don't rock my world because I'd much rather be rid of those to have room for toys that actually do. Think about it that way; maybe you spent $100 on a dildo that your wife doesn't like that much, which sucks. But would you rather keep it laying around and trying it now and again with disappointing results or get a toy that makes her eyes pop?

I think overall you just need to communicate more about dildos. It seems like she's not comfortable with your choices or your attempts to find the right toys (ie measuring with a vegetable?). Your next purchase you should let her decide or choose together.
04/02/2011
Contributor: w-o-name w-o-name
Just keep them
04/15/2011
Contributor: callsignhusker callsignhusker
Haha the poll options were funny!
04/18/2011
Contributor: AngelicaU AngelicaU
experiment! you could create something cool and itd be a benefit so youre not wasting money
04/18/2011
Contributor: indiglo indiglo
I say go for the experiment! She isn't using them anyway, so you might as well have some fun - almost like Dr. Frankenstein. LOL
04/20/2011
Contributor: ichwillwaffels ichwillwaffels
Quote:
Originally posted by trios
After about a few years of trying to get my wife to use different dildos, she continues to show disinterest with all but 1. So basically, I have 4 others that we don't use because they are either way too big, too hard, or the head is too ... more
I would just keep them around. She may have a change of heart
04/24/2011
Contributor: Fuck it. Fuck it.
Talk to her about what she wants and let her pick out her own toys.
04/26/2011