Would this spray work for women?

i don't think so.

is there such a thing for what she explained?

The reason you're tight & tender is from all the blood in the tissues which then causes fluid build up in the tissues; this happens with arousal & orgasm. If you want to delay orgasms, yes you could try this product, especially on your clit, but it's not safe for using on larger areas of mucous membranes because it gets absorbed into the blood quicker that way & may result in unsafe blood levels of the active ingredient, Benzocaine.

You may find it hard to get aroused if you numb your clit, but it will help prevent orgasm. That should in turn help with avoiding the swelling & sensitivity, but eventually, you're going to experience it once you are aroused enough & have a climax.

That's when you have to be really careful using this. Once you're tight & sensitive, using this will bypass your body's signals about what you can handle due to the swelling. The tightness will still be there & it will be harder to physically fit things inside, you just won't feel the discomfort from it, so you could hurt yourself without knowing it. If you're very familiar with you body's responses & are in control of how vigorous the play gets, you could try using this, sparingly.

I wasn't too sure what you meant about long shoots ahead of you, but I guessed. So, I hope I helped you. Let me know if you have any more questions or if I didn't explain it very well, I'm tired