help my husband care

AndromedaJane AndromedaJane
She Comes First review
Related to: 
I have a higher sex drive than DH, and put much, much more effort into making our sex life fulfilling than he does. The most painful aspect of this: he has never, not even once, made the effort to bring me to orgasm. How can I make him understand that this is important even though I obviously enjoy sex without orgasm?
12/10/2011
  • It's Better Than Real! Buy 1 Dildo Or Anal Toy And Get 1 FRE
  • Try a luxury harness with a dildo and save 45% on a kit!
  • Better Price - Save 40%
  • Better Price Sale - Save 50%
  • Better Price Sale - Save 60%
  • 1
  • 2
  • 3
  • 4
  • 5
All promotions
RonLee RonLee
Therapy.
12/10/2011
Ansley Ansley
Talk to him. Mirror in your words what he doesn't do in the bedroom:

"How would you feel if I only concentrated on my orgasms and not yours?"

Let him answer, honestly. And then go from there. Some people are just oblivious to things and talking about it always helps. Overtalking about it, in some cases. If he doesn't step up, keep talking and find out way. Does he not know how? Is it not important to him? Is sex in general not important to him? Just keep talking!
12/10/2011
MichNichole MichNichole
start off teasing him more...and don't let him touch you. Maybe this will give you some time to foreplay and possibly help you to???
12/10/2011
indiglo indiglo
Quote:
Originally posted by Ansley
Talk to him. Mirror in your words what he doesn't do in the bedroom:

"How would you feel if I only concentrated on my orgasms and not yours?"

Let him answer, honestly. And then go from there. Some people are just oblivious ... More
Yep, ditto to this. Communicate, communicate and communicate some more! Use "I" statements, and avoid placing blame or criticizing. Sit down to talk to him at a neutral time when sex is not on the menu and you're both calm.

And also keep in mind that it isn't his job alone to bring you to orgasm, that's something you have a part in too. Would he be ok with you touching yourself during sex, or using a toy? Orgasms are 50/50 and we all have to be active participants in our own pleasure and our partner's pleasure.

I sure do wish you both the best!
12/10/2011
MidnightB MidnightB
Quote:
Originally posted by AndromedaJane
I have a higher sex drive than DH, and put much, much more effort into making our sex life fulfilling than he does. The most painful aspect of this: he has never, not even once, made the effort to bring me to orgasm. How can I make him understand ... More
Oh dear that is so inconsiderate of him, you really need to talk to him honestly and let him answer, he will be really gutted he cant make his own wife orgasm (or he should feel like this).
My OH spend ages making me come up to 4-5 times before he even goes for it.
I really hope you can sort things out!
03/16/2012
k0a4kkag k0a4kkag
Quote:
Originally posted by AndromedaJane
I have a higher sex drive than DH, and put much, much more effort into making our sex life fulfilling than he does. The most painful aspect of this: he has never, not even once, made the effort to bring me to orgasm. How can I make him understand ... More
Communication is key. There are many ways a women comes to orgasm. First you need to know how you can get there. Knowing your own body is key. Once you know how you orgasm, vaginal, clitirious, etc. You need to relay this to him. Teach him what you need. Also don't use terminology like va jayjay, ho ha. If you don't use the right terms, he's never going to know what you're talking about.
08/06/2012
Total posts: 7
Unique posters: 7