My husband's libido

Noelle Noelle
I am a VERY sexual woman who married a man 10 yrs older than me. I love him so much, but he IS older and has a lower libido. Sometimes I try and initiate sex (a lot of times actually), but I get shut down. I am getting really frustrated, because now I am starting to obsess about sex. It's very distracting, and I am a total B*$#@% when I go more than 3 days without it. What can I do to get him to want me more? I'm in fantastic shape, so my weight isn't an issue. I'm not ugly, or unclean. I don't understand what it is, and he says were great, but I don't feel like we are...
06/30/2012
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Sinfully Sinfully
I wouldn't be able to deal with that. In fact lack of sex is why my last relationship didn't work out. I broke it off cause I couldn't get more attached to him only to be disappointed. I knew I didn't want that for the rest of my life (or for a significant amount of time.) Don't really know what to say. I guess talk to him about it. That's really all you can do is talk to him if you wanna work it out.
06/30/2012
indiglo indiglo
Being older and having a lower libido don't necessarily go hand in hand, they can, but not necessarily. Has he always had a lower libido than you? Or is this a new problem?

That being said, when was the last time he had a full check up at the doctor? Testosterone can drop with age, and seriously affect sex drives. The doctor should also make sure he doesn't have any other medical issues that may be affecting his sex drive.

If he's always had a lower libido and there are no health issues currently, then maybe he just has a lower libido. In that case, it sounds like you 2 will need to sit down (more than once, most likely) and just have a heart to heart. Talk about what you both need, and try to figure out a way to keep both of you as happy as possible - together. More than likely there will be some changes and some compromises you both can make to keep your marriage happy.

Best wishes to you!
06/30/2012
Adnerbmw Adnerbmw
I totally understand, i married my highschool sweet heart and things were great when we first got together, but hes always had a lower ex drive than me, and no he is on medication that is really killing his sex drive so literally i am lucky to get sex once a week, if that and have the time it feels more like pity sex than real passionate he wants me cant keep his hands off me sex. its very frustrating, he is now taking pills to try and counteract the effects of the other drug, its super hard.
05/19/2013
evie.amor evie.amor
I'm in a similar situation. It sucks. I messaged you with more details.
05/19/2013
Total posts: 5
Unique posters: 5