Deaf and hard of hearing

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Deaf and hard of hearing

indiechick indiechick
Does anyone have tips about how to maintain a romantic setting when you have to keep the lights on for deaf and hard of hearing partners.

I hope this isn't too invasive of a question, its a project for my ASL culture class.


As always, thank you in advance.
05/02/2012
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VelvetDragon VelvetDragon
I assume you mean for romantic dinner and so on, not for sex?

I grew up in a mixed Deaf household and my auditory comprehension sucks sometimes.

I find that dim lighting is just fine to see what someone is saying. This can be accomplished with a fireplace and enough candles, really, or those fancy lights you can buy that are colored, or draping colored semi-transparent cloths over lights. Reading lips is harder in dim lighting than understanding ASL, in my opinion.

When we'd go camping, often just the campfire was enough for the Deaf members of the family to talk and understand.

As for... more intimate encounters, again, candle or dimmed colored lighting has always been plenty for me to understand, and a LOT can be accomplished through touch, to communicate without words.

Do you have any more specific questions? Part of the problem is I've never particularly "created" romantic space... romantic for me has always been going out to a nice restaurant, or cuddling together on the couch. Haha. And I like sex equally with the lights on (so I can watch) and off, heh.
05/02/2012
Ansley Ansley
Quote:
Originally posted by VelvetDragon
I assume you mean for romantic dinner and so on, not for sex?

I grew up in a mixed Deaf household and my auditory comprehension sucks sometimes.

I find that dim lighting is just fine to see what someone is saying. This can be ...
Hmm, it would be really neat if the couple had worked out a system of signals for sex. Like a tap on the thigh means harder...similar to a green light, yellow light, red light system.
05/02/2012
Petite Valentine Petite Valentine
Quote:
Originally posted by indiechick
Does anyone have tips about how to maintain a romantic setting when you have to keep the lights on for deaf and hard of hearing partners.

I hope this isn't too invasive of a question, its a project for my ASL culture class.


As ...
I consider this a strange question. Why does romantic setting ? light?
05/02/2012
indiechick indiechick
Quote:
Originally posted by Petite Valentine
I consider this a strange question. Why does romantic setting ? light?
I picked romantic setting because I think that how does sex work is a horrible question and someone in my class actually posed it. Romantic dinners, walks at night on the beach things like that
05/02/2012
VelvetDragon VelvetDragon
I generally don't talk during moonlit walks on the beach anyway. A lot is communicated by holding hands.
05/03/2012
Petite Valentine Petite Valentine
Quote:
Originally posted by indiechick
I picked romantic setting because I think that how does sex work is a horrible question and someone in my class actually posed it. Romantic dinners, walks at night on the beach things like that
I didn't notice it when I made the post, but my "does not equal" symbol was changed to a question mark.

What I was trying to ask is why does an absence of light equal romance? For the most part, people don't have control over the lighting of exterior locations: park, beach, etc, but even in an interior setting, why would a dinner be less romantic just because the lights are on? Same thing with sex — not every one needs to turn down or turn off the lights to enjoy it:

Lights On or Off?

Lights on or off

Lights ON or OFF?
05/04/2012
indiechick indiechick
Quote:
Originally posted by Petite Valentine
I didn't notice it when I made the post, but my "does not equal" symbol was changed to a question mark.

What I was trying to ask is why does an absence of light equal romance? For the most part, people don't have control ...
i personally do enjoy the lights low...or waking up in the morning and being intimate before getting out of bed.. but you are right that's not the same for everyone
05/04/2012
benjiwithaz benjiwithaz
Quote:
Originally posted by indiechick
Does anyone have tips about how to maintain a romantic setting when you have to keep the lights on for deaf and hard of hearing partners.

I hope this isn't too invasive of a question, its a project for my ASL culture class.


As ...
Many deaf people use tactile sign language! This is mainly in response to the person who was devising some sort of tapping method of communication.
12/21/2014
TheToyGuy TheToyGuy
Quote:
Originally posted by benjiwithaz
Many deaf people use tactile sign language! This is mainly in response to the person who was devising some sort of tapping method of communication.
I would say tactile or tap code works well in total dimness and over time couples would develop their own understanding of each other.

But on the nature of sign language in the bedroom I was lucky enough, due to the industry I work in, to be taught manual alphabet. However unlike the American version which uses one hand. Auslan (Australian Sign Language) of BANZSL uses two hands predominantly.

The very few times I was ever with someone that was hearing impared it was with the lights on and somewhat difficult to understand unless we both stopped and signed.
09/12/2015
grrrldickz grrrldickz
Quote:
Originally posted by indiechick
Does anyone have tips about how to maintain a romantic setting when you have to keep the lights on for deaf and hard of hearing partners.

I hope this isn't too invasive of a question, its a project for my ASL culture class.


As ...
You could dim the lights slightly but put up some candles, or Christmas lights.

Atmosphere is everything. Scent is a big thing for some people. Maybe try scented candles or nice perfume/cologne.

Curtains and blankets and pillows, flowers, stuff like that. Use interior decorating skills to make things visually appealing. Simple and pretty. Minimal but nice-looking. Oh, and a clean room! Vacuum up. No food on the floor. Wash the dishes. Nothing sexier than responsibility.
11/27/2015
TheToyGuy TheToyGuy
Quote:
Originally posted by grrrldickz
You could dim the lights slightly but put up some candles, or Christmas lights.

Atmosphere is everything. Scent is a big thing for some people. Maybe try scented candles or nice perfume/cologne.

Curtains and blankets and pillows, ...
Interesting.
11/28/2015
Total posts: 12
Unique posters: 7