How many sexual partners have you had?

Naughty Student Naughty Student
Quote:
Originally posted by That Weird Guy
Oh god if I dated some one with 30 experience points I'd feel bad because I'd still be level 1.. I'd feel like she'd have gotten much better than me..
Don't wrry about it! My boyfriend was a virgin when we met and I thought he was lying bcs he was so good in bed. I think what makes him good is that he understand my needs rather than experience but now he has had quite a lot of experience
05/15/2009
Red Red
LOL I had the hardest time answering this - namely, deciding what counted. I still don't really know how many partners I've had.

How embarrassing!
05/16/2009
NaughtyButterfly NaughtyButterfly
My number is 3, one ex bf (together for 4 years), a one nighter with a guy I had known for years, and now my hubby. I don't think it will ever go up, but that is fine by me.
05/16/2009
TexasBrat TexasBrat
Quote:
Originally posted by Sleeping Dreamer
I know many of my friends and I used to "compare notes" of our sexual partners and how many we had. I had a running tally of how many men my best friend had been with which was remarkably easy to keep because it never exceeded past ... More
I've had 9 sexual partners. So has my hubby. When we were "talking numbers", it was kinda funny, because he told me his number first, and I laughed & said that I didn't want him to think I was copying him, but mine was the same! LOL
05/17/2009
TexasBrat TexasBrat
Quote:
Originally posted by Sleeping Dreamer
lol! I just figured guesstimating would help, I used to be one of those girls that kept a list... oh god, have I said too much? lol.
I had a list too! LOL
05/17/2009
Czechmate Czechmate
Quote:
Originally posted by Perish
Wow some has done a 100 people...that blows my mind lolz.
That was me, and I counted "oral only" encounters as sex. If I count only vaginal or anal sex, the number comes down into the 80's. Way too many people for me, but I had no idea what I was looking for at that moment in my life.
05/27/2009
Boxers Over Briefs Boxers Over Briefs
Wow, I'd always thought everyone else has had more partners than me, but it looks like I'm right in the middle of it.

There's definitely a "too many" for me. I kind of feel like at a certain point, I'd be sacrificing a deeper relationship in favor of breadth. I really like to take the time to get to know how to work someone's knobs and buttons (heh... euphemisms).
05/28/2009
Dark Muse Dark Muse
I've had intercourse 7 times, oral sex... I don't even remember how many so I won't even bother trying to count. Which is bad. Sort of. Not really. I hate the gendered stereotypes and beliefs about sex that so many people hold in today's society. I'm not a slut, or a bad person. I don't see sex as bad or wrong, but so many people I know do. It's tragic really.

It has arisen as a problem/minor disagreement before with my partner since he has had intercourse with 2 people, while I've had 7, and I'm 4 years younger (I'm only 21). I was his first, as well. I don't consider myself a slut, and I don't regret any of it (even the drunken one night stand with the sailor from Malawi whose name I don't remember but my partner sure does!) The actual problem is more from jealousy and woulda coulda shoulda's in his book.

I personally don't think 7 is a very high number, but most of my friends are virgins on have only had sex with one or two people. *shrug* whatever floats their boat. Really, I think the perfect number is whatever the individual feels comfortable with. If you want to have sex with 20 people, then I hope you enjoy every partner and are safe about it. If you want to just have sex with one partner, that's fantastic too!

But in the end... I regret nothing!
05/29/2009
Femme Mystique Femme Mystique
It's either seven or eight, I can't remember which now. Pretty average, I think.
06/02/2009
Raven Raven
Quote:
Originally posted by Tuesday
I'm really surprised by the low numbers I'm seeing.
So am I. I was going to comment on my number, but maybe that's not such a good idea. I will say that I don't have any qualms about the number and I don't regret a single one. It helped me know what and who I wanted, and I was able to get some stuff out of my system before settling down. My sweet, loving, affectionate husband is one in a million and I have never had any desire to cheat on him and we couldn't be happier.
06/10/2009
Dragon Dragon
Quote:
Originally posted by That Weird Guy
Oh god if I dated some one with 30 experience points I'd feel bad because I'd still be level 1.. I'd feel like she'd have gotten much better than me..
And you might just enjoy some really hot sex while she taught you a few things. Don't freak out if it happens.... (And accept her sexuality)

Just do so with safety in mind.
06/13/2009
Dragon Dragon
I think that the numbers matter more when you're looking for a relationship. When you're involved in an emotional relationship and it's just sex then it doesn't bother you, if you've made that choice.
06/13/2009
Cwhitten006 Cwhitten006
Quote:
Originally posted by Adriana Ravenlust
I have had only 1 and I married him so maybe it will stay only 1 but who is to say. I wouldn't mind moving my number a bit higher, should the perfect situation present itself.I don't have a number in my mind that is too few or too many.I say ... More
I also have only had sex with one man and I am also married to him. He has only been with three, but I wonder sometimes if our sex lives would be better if we would of had more partners before each other. I'm saying we don't have great sex, but I can't help but wonder if it could of been better. What is your input on that?
06/26/2009
Liz Liz
Quote:
Originally posted by Sleeping Dreamer
I know many of my friends and I used to "compare notes" of our sexual partners and how many we had. I had a running tally of how many men my best friend had been with which was remarkably easy to keep because it never exceeded past ... More
I've had six: high school sweetheart, a one-night stand in college, two longish-term boyfriends during my college years & early 20's, a six-month fling, and my current partner of a year.
06/26/2009
Angel deSanguine Angel deSanguine
My husband has had signifigantly less partners than I have... he's had 2 (I am one of them, obviously) and I have had a lot more than that.. A LOT... it took me a little bit to get over that. Not because he'd only had two, but because I'd had so many and I felt a bit self conscious. He doesn't mind, though, and now it doesn't bother me. It's not one I'd necessarily get tattooed on (though wouldn't that be a fun one to explain? lol!) but hell, for the most part, it was a fun ride. Get it, fun ride?
06/26/2009
Angel deSanguine Angel deSanguine
Quote:
Originally posted by Angel deSanguine
My husband has had signifigantly less partners than I have... he's had 2 (I am one of them, obviously) and I have had a lot more than that.. A LOT... it took me a little bit to get over that. Not because he'd only had two, but because I'd ... More
Oh god, that was awful... sorry to inflict that upon the masses, I am sleep deprived. I have had one hell of a week, as if horrible plays on words like that didn't give that away!
06/26/2009
Adriana Ravenlust Adriana Ravenlust
Quote:
Originally posted by Cwhitten006
I also have only had sex with one man and I am also married to him. He has only been with three, but I wonder sometimes if our sex lives would be better if we would of had more partners before each other. I'm saying we don't have great sex, ... More
I don't really feel that more partners would equal better sex. I mean, I've got a lifetime to perfect it and explore, right? But enough of me believes in the whole one true love/happy fairytale ending crap that I do feel a little bummed I wasn't his only.
06/26/2009
Valyn Valyn
I'm at around 10 or so. I'm not sure how I feel about the number, but I'm not ashamed of it.

I don't think there is a "normal". My aunt and uncle met in high school and have been together for over 50 years, and still seem completely in love. And on the other hand, I've met people who couldn't just settle down without having different experiences first. I think normal is relative.
06/26/2009
Jimbo Jones Jimbo Jones
Quote:
Originally posted by Cwhitten006
I also have only had sex with one man and I am also married to him. He has only been with three, but I wonder sometimes if our sex lives would be better if we would of had more partners before each other. I'm saying we don't have great sex, ... More
My partner and I are in a similar situation. We are both the only sexual partner that the other has had. We have been married for 14 years and the one thing that I think keeps our sex life good is being open and communicating well with each other. We are both willing to try new things and we both listen to what the other person wants. We won't bring others into the relationship, and we don't look at porn, but other than that, things are pretty open. It's possible if one or both of you had more partners than you might know better what pleases you and he might know better what pleases him, but I think some patience and experimentation can help you both learn those things together over time.
06/26/2009
Tuesday Tuesday
Quote:
Originally posted by Adriana Ravenlust
I don't really feel that more partners would equal better sex. I mean, I've got a lifetime to perfect it and explore, right? But enough of me believes in the whole one true love/happy fairytale ending crap that I do feel a little bummed I ... More
I know its possible to have a great sex life if you've only had one or a few partners. But you're less likely to have found a partner who is so good you couldn't have imagined someone could be that good unless you've had quite a number of them. I guess that tells you where in the spectrum I voted.

I know that if I had only been with my husband I might have wondered that there was something wrong with me sexually.
06/27/2009
Adriana Ravenlust Adriana Ravenlust
Quote:
Originally posted by Tuesday
I know its possible to have a great sex life if you've only had one or a few partners. But you're less likely to have found a partner who is so good you couldn't have imagined someone could be that good unless you've had quite a ... More
Mmm, I don't know. I figure anyone I have, I can mold. Maybe I just got lucky with a moldable person.

Why would you have wondered if there is something wrong with you?!?
06/29/2009
Alan & Michele Alan & Michele
It may have been good to have the age (of the person taking the poll) on here too. The reason is, Michele and I both were teens back in the day when you didn't have to worry much about catching anything that couldn't be cured with a quick shot. HIV and AIDS were unheard of. And yeah, everybody fucked alot. The biggest thing we had to worry about about was whether or not the rabbit died (and no, I'm not talking about the vibrating toy).
That being said, we're both in the "10-20" range (including oral encounters), but I would NEVER even consider being so active in this day and age if I were single.
07/05/2009
spicywife spicywife
Quote:
Originally posted by Jimbo Jones
My partner and I are in a similar situation. We are both the only sexual partner that the other has had. We have been married for 14 years and the one thing that I think keeps our sex life good is being open and communicating well with each other. We ... More
Your situation is the exact as mine, except my husband and I have been together for 8 1/2 years. He was my first sex partner and I was his. We haven't been with anyone else. We don't look at porn and neither of us want to. But we are very open and we communicate. We like to try new things (that only involve us) and we're happy just being together and exploring sexual satisfaction with each other. Everyone needs to do whats right for their relationship of course, but for us we are intimate and enjoy pleasing each other but wouldn't bring another person into the mix. Since my husband is my first and I'm his, it makes our intamicy that much stronger. It just adds another lovely dimension to our marriage
07/05/2009
MildOats MildOats
I marked the 10-20 range, and to me, that's kind of a high number. My wife was a virgin when she met me.

Personally, I think my skills really topped out at partner number 3. For the most part, I think your skills develop as soon as you find a partner who is communicative, and/or is more skilled than you and can teach you a fair amount. After that, the odds of you finding additional skills or information from newer partners diminishes dramatically. About the only thing I found out with each additional partner was just how everyone is a lot more alike than they are different.

Why so many partners then? For many years, I thought sex was the most important thing in a relationship (or at least in the top 3 things) so I made it a top priority in the beginnning of the relationship. Unfortunately, it also meant that I missed out on a lot of other more important qualities that make a relationship last. Ironically, the one time I decided to "give up" and put sex last in terms of priorities, was the woman I married.
08/02/2009
Britni TheVadgeWig Britni TheVadgeWig
I don't keep an exact count, but I can estimate. And my boy and girl lists are separate in my head, but I can add them if I have to. I have an idea within a range of 5 people or so. A number's just a number.
08/11/2009
Britni TheVadgeWig Britni TheVadgeWig
Quote:
Originally posted by Perish
Wow some has done a 100 people...that blows my mind lolz.
I don't know if you meant it that way, but this comes off as kind of judgmental.
08/11/2009
Envy Envy
Only one for me, and hopefully will stay that way as we plan to marry. I'm his only one as well. We prefer it that way, so we can grow and learn together--we're not keen on sharing each other, that's for sure, lol!
08/11/2009
Alluring_Irony Alluring_Irony
Well I lost my virginity Feb. of 2006... and I've been with about 12 guys since June 2007..... Oops! Hahah
08/11/2009
Tuesday Tuesday
Quote:
Originally posted by Adriana Ravenlust
Mmm, I don't know. I figure anyone I have, I can mold. Maybe I just got lucky with a moldable person.

Why would you have wondered if there is something wrong with you?!?
Only some men are moldable. Some don't last long, come quickly and aren't into oral either. And when he's done he's done. What can you do with that? Its like what one comedian said "I've had injections that were slower than that."

If I didn't know how good other men could be and knowing that other women do climax with men, I might well have concluded that there was something wrong with me.
08/11/2009
Tuesday Tuesday
And no second try in one night either.
08/11/2009
Total posts: 237
Unique posters: 197