Here's an uncomfortable question that will make you think. Dare to answer?

MJ7 MJ7
Maybe I'm selfish but I have a lot of my own self-worth. I wouldn't have unprotected sex with someone with an STI even if I loved them.
09/14/2012
LavenderSkies LavenderSkies
Quote:
Originally posted by ToyGurl
So, today at the STD support group we came upon this question:

If your life partner/husband/wife had an STD, and you had never had sex, or never had sex unprotected (which would expose your to the STD) would you sacrifice your body for your ... More
I would leave if they have kept it a secret for so long.
10/03/2012
damnbul12 damnbul12
I would be scared to contract an STD.
10/08/2012
smasmasma smasmasma
That is waaay to big of a secret to keep. I would be out of there!
10/14/2012
RememberMe RememberMe
Quote:
Originally posted by ToyGurl
I would personally make the sacrifice. I think the only STD I would not want to contract would be HIV/AIDS. I want to have children, and I want to have healthy children. I also want to be there for them when they grow older. This doesn't mean I ... More
Sweetness =)
11/22/2012
pestilence pestilence
I most likely wouldn't, especially if transmission could be prevented through condom use. I have no interest in children, so that's not an issue for me.
11/22/2012
Buh-bye Buh-bye
If my partner was keeping it a secret, that would make me question our entire relationship. That is something you share with whoever you're having sex with, protected or not.
11/23/2012
MidnightStorm MidnightStorm
That is a hard question... I should hope that I would be told when the relationship got serious and THEN we could discuss it. I would definitely want to see a doctor to find out about my risk, etc. I honestly don't know if I could stay in that relationship--but it wouldn't necessarily be due to kids or anything of that nature, just fear.
11/23/2012
Mamastoys Mamastoys
Quote:
Originally posted by newlady
We've been married 26 years. If an STD showed up now... one of us would have some 'splainin' to do!
I'm with you!! we are going on 30 years and they don't "just appear!"
11/29/2012
needapacker needapacker
i'm sterile so having kids doesnt matter to me. If we keep it safe then I'm all good.
12/13/2012
Martiniman Martiniman
In the scenario you put forth, I'm afraid I'd divorce them. It's not so much the STD, but the distrust that would be created.
12/13/2012
Rawr4483 Rawr4483
I don't know if it would be worth it..love doesn't always last forever but STDs can!
12/14/2012
hem hem
I feel like there are sooo many other factors (which others have brought up). For example, any sort of secrecy issues if the STD has been kept secret for a really long time.
I also think that stating it as "sacrificing your body" is a little oversimplified; contracting an STD doesn't only affect your body, it affects your relationships, your life overall, your opportunities, and so forth... so there's a lot to consider. Basically, safe sex should be had!
12/28/2012
MasqueVivi MasqueVivi
There's a huge matter of a breach of trust involved in the very premise of thos whole question though. I don't care about children, so I would always have protected sex with a person if I loved them, but if they had actually irreparably damaged my trust in them by either cheating on me or having never told me so late in the game, then that's a WHOLE OTHER ISSUE. It depends entirely on the context of the scenario if I could forgive them enough to stay with them.

That's a much bigger deal to me than an STD.
12/28/2012
Leather & Lace Leather & Lace
I wouldn't be with someone who had an STD in the first place.
12/29/2012
bratcat bratcat
I know people that go into relationships and do not realize they have an STD until way down the line. Personally, out of all my relationships, i was the one to get tested annually/after every new partner while none of them had ever been tested.
If my long-term partner had an STD it would defiantly be something to discuss, but i couldnt see it hurting our sex life, we would have to compromise and ALWAYS practice STD prevention methods during sex such as using a condom. And of course i would be there for them if they were receiving a treatment for an STD and do everything in my power to help and support them, as i hope they would do for me. As far as children go, adoption or surrogacy is totally an option i hope we'd both be willing to discuss.
01/27/2013
Genderfree Genderfree
I would not ask how they got the disease. That's in the past. This is now. I don't want to cause any more pain than it would have caused initially to come out to me about that sort of thing and live with an STD.

First thing I would do is look at treatment options. I would not have unprotected sex with them, and adopt children, since many STDs can be passed onto children. Together we'd work on treatment options until it's cured, maybe then think about having children. Even then, I'd want to be cautious; these kind of things can come back.
02/16/2013
noway noway
Depends on the severity and permanence of the disease...
02/16/2013
wwwww wwwww
Personally I think it might break my relationship, especially if it's a scenario where the other party knew they had an STI and never told me. I don't like being deceived. I'm not really motivated to have children so I wouldn't be affected by that part of the scenario but the deception would certainly get to me. Dragging someone into a relationship without being upfront about whether or not you have something that you could pass onto them is a serious offence to me. If you have no qualms against keeping an STI a secret, what's stopping you from keeping other secrets?
04/01/2013
TheirPet TheirPet
Use a condom and adopt, but I'd be adopting anyway so it isn't a big change.
04/01/2013
Munko Munko
Gosh this is a tough one. I have to agree it would never get to the point of husband without intimacy...but partner...maybe?

I know a few couples and individuals who live quite happily with (in terms of STD's) rather harmless STD's. But there are definitely more serious ones like HIV or AIDS that I wouldn't want to contract.

That said though - if my fiance contracted HIV through poor medical practices or something similar. I wouldn't leave. I don't know what that would mean for our intimacy or our desire to have more children, though.

It really would be hard to say without being in that situation.
04/02/2013
MrWill MrWill
Too many variables for a real answer. What STI is it, can it cause issues for our child if we have one together, why wasn't I told before we made the decision to really give a LONG term thing a shot?
04/11/2013
Edeneve Edeneve
I'm not getting sick for anyone. that person & I may love each other at the time, however, people split up all the time.
04/11/2013
never shy never shy
No because I don't want a std and I wouldn't trust him
04/11/2013
TheHardOne TheHardOne
I would continue to make love with my partner, but never without a condom. Even if that means not having children.
04/16/2013
dancingduo dancingduo
tough question; this assumes you never got tested prior to getting married...which is rare--not sure if life partners do this or not. But if you did, they either cheated on you, used 'amazing' drugs very foolishly, or contracted it in another way. If either of the former, I would leave with the kids in order to protect them and myself. Depending on the circumstance of the last one would depend on my answer. Right now if it was something simple I wouldn't mind the sacrifice.
05/18/2013
joiedejouets joiedejouets
I would be annoyed if my partner lied to me about something like that, I can't realistically see myself with someone who is diseased.
06/12/2013
karenm karenm
I would probably be mad them for not telling me sooner, and possibly break it off or just have sex with a condom if we stayed together.
06/12/2013
Total posts: 88
Unique posters: 84