Herpes: AKA HSV1 & HSV2

Contributor: wrecklesswords wrecklesswords
If you're not comfortable identifying yourself, I totally understand.

On November 9th of this year, I was diagnosed with HSV2, genital herpes. I'm not entirely sure which partner I got it from, but it is most likely my most recent ex/the first man I ever fell in love with. My symptoms started showing within four days of having sexual contact with him. We used a condom, but I still contracted it. Could still be someone else, but the timing just seems...well, suspect.

Anyway, long story short, I hadn't seen him in seven years, and then we saw each other again, had sex, I got herpes, he still never went and got tested, our relationship then ended for different reasons, and well...here I am.

I want to be more open about it since it is such a common STD to get. I was immediately put on anti-virals and it helped my outbreak and I haven't had an outbreak in over a month now. I've had a teeny little flare up, but I've been taking a lot of vitamins to combat the virus itself and keep my immunity tip top. I've even been trying to make gradual diet changes to better my body.

If you're comfortable talking about it, I'd love to have a discussion with you about it. Or you can message me privately if you want advice. I became a mild expert within a few days. I cannot harbor anger for the person who gave it to me. He and I both hadn't been responsible enough to get regular STD screenings in the last several years. So it would be hypocritical of me to be upset with him for something I wasn't even doing. He legitimately didn't know he had it.

I do have a sexual partner now. Just a friend with benefits. I'd been attracted to him since before my ex and I got together. It got worse, and finally when it came to a head and I couldn't handle it anymore, I broke up with my ex (we had SO many issues, too), and told this person that I had herpes and couldn't sleep with him. Welp. He has it, too. Contracted it about 8 years ago when he was my age (I'm 27), took the anti-virals only a few times in his life so far and has only had the first outbreak. He was lucky that his was only two little spots...I was not so lucky. I suffered for about three weeks.

I do really want to work on getting rid of the negative stigma around genital herpes. It may not be curable, but it IS treatable and manageable and it doesn't make anyone dirty, disgusting, gross, unclean...nothing like that.

If you need a friend to talk to about it, I am here.
12/27/2015
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Contributor: OH&W, Lovebears OH&W, Lovebears
wrecklesswords,
That is really big of you to do this. I'm sure others would like to talk to someone if they have it or want infor. Sorry it happened to you.
12/27/2015
Contributor: wrecklesswords wrecklesswords
Quote:
Originally posted by OH&W, Lovebears
wrecklesswords,
That is really big of you to do this. I'm sure others would like to talk to someone if they have it or want infor. Sorry it happened to you.
Thank you!

I just want the stigma to go away. Because it's SO COMMON whether its oral or genital herpes, so many people have one or the other or both. It shouldn't be stigmatized. It's a virus that we literally have no control over. It happened to me with protection with someone who has never had symptoms ever. They make some really great anti-viral drugs now that help it all and help our bodies produce anti-bodies against it.
12/27/2015
Contributor: Vnessa Vnessa
I'm so sorry you are going through this. It's a hard lesson/burden to bare and It's very courageous of you to speak out about. If more people did, more would listen, and perhaps, not have to walk in the same shoes. I think you are handling this so well. I hope that you will get to the point where your flare ups are a thing of a distant memory. It must be so painful and uncomfortable
12/27/2015
Contributor: wrecklesswords wrecklesswords
Quote:
Originally posted by Vnessa
I'm so sorry you are going through this. It's a hard lesson/burden to bare and It's very courageous of you to speak out about. If more people did, more would listen, and perhaps, not have to walk in the same shoes. I think you are ... more
I hope so as well! I'm having a small one right now, but soaking in an Epsom salt bath and taking my vitamins seems to be helping me!

I hope one day more people can talk about it.
12/28/2015
Contributor: Inquisitor Inquisitor
Wrecklesswords, Thank you for your honesty and bravery. I know it can be difficult to share this information to others, especially those that are not well informed about the subject. As you and others have mentioned Herpes, both types, is fairly common. I've read in some reports that it can be as common as about 1 in 5 people have some form of it, so know that you are not alone in this.
12/29/2015
Contributor: BlackOrchid BlackOrchid
I don't really have much to say, but thanks for sharing your story. It might really help someone going through the same situation, just to have some support. It's nice to hear such a fresh honest perspective on something so personal.
12/29/2015
Contributor: wrecklesswords wrecklesswords
Quote:
Originally posted by Inquisitor
Wrecklesswords, Thank you for your honesty and bravery. I know it can be difficult to share this information to others, especially those that are not well informed about the subject. As you and others have mentioned Herpes, both types, is fairly ... more
Yes, that's about as common as it is. And there are a lot of people that were born with oral herpes just because it's a family trait.
12/30/2015
Contributor: wrecklesswords wrecklesswords
Quote:
Originally posted by BlackOrchid
I don't really have much to say, but thanks for sharing your story. It might really help someone going through the same situation, just to have some support. It's nice to hear such a fresh honest perspective on something so personal.
Thank you! That is my hope with opening up.
12/30/2015
Contributor: TheToyGuy TheToyGuy
It takes courage to be open with such topics.

It is part of my job to counsel people in similar situations.
02/02/2016
Contributor: wrecklesswords wrecklesswords
Well, here's an update. I just told someone for the first time. Well, someone that didn't already have it that I'm sexually interested in. I just told her. Like minutes ago. I had to send it via text because we're both very busy and hardly get to see each other as is.

Outside of my friends, I have told three people now that I am sexually interested in. The first one I told already had it and it was no big deal to him at all. The second person, I wasn't even sexually interested in at first, mostly emotionally, but now it's progressed. He was fine with it and thinks he might have it, he just needs to go get tested....and now this girl.

Soooo... yep.

Oh and I told my boss at my main job the other day. I was having a terrible day at work and kept sobbing and told her about all the stress I've been under the last three months.
02/08/2016
Contributor: wrecklesswords wrecklesswords
I recently learned that there are a lot of arousal creams and libido pills that have L-Arginine in them...which is what can feed the Herpes virus. So, there's some products that those of us with herpes cannot use.

I work is a sex shop, so I've had a lot of spare time to read ingredient labels.
05/11/2016