To Cum or not to Cum......

MamaDivine MamaDivine
Quite frankly, I feel awful when hubby "goes" before I do, because I know he's going to feel like crap knowing that I didn't "get mine". Honestly, I have fun with or without an orgasm. Its more than that to me. So, should I fake it to make him feel better or not be as self conscious? Or should I just ride it out and be honest? What do YOU do?
Answers (public voting - your screen name will appear in the results):
Never have this issue
slynch , Silverdrop , Ryuson , LAndJ , eeep , The Curious Couple , Elnoa , punkstar283 , ~LaUr3n~ , Sir
10
Be honest, He's going to be upset either way
Chirple , Silverdrop , CoffeeCup , padmeamidala , ellejay , eeep , zracer , Coralbell , Gracie , jay28 , Gallowraven , Ms. Spice , Katelyn , OroNomi , XYCopperheadSly , Hallmar82 , BlooJay , indiglo , Zombirella , Lummox , jakjak , Rossie , Kitka , Miss Morphine , ily , Sir , SilverMinxxx , bekabu , dks210
29
Lie and Fake it, save the poor mans' dignity
Other: Leave comment
Silverdrop , Ryuson , Gunsmoke , Jon S , Fun with Dick & Jane , poetprincess , BobbiJay , Zombirella , Rossie , married with children , Brandonn , Anjulie , John E W , MamaDivine
14
Total votes: 53 (46 voters)
Poll is closed
01/15/2012
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Chirple Chirple
I'd talk to him about how you feel, and if he wants to do more to give you orgasms, give him some tips !

Faking it just... it just seems like such a terrible thing to do.
01/15/2012
Silverdrop Silverdrop
Just because he comes doesn't mean playtime has to be over. If he wants to get you off, have him get out the toys and do so!
01/15/2012
PeaceToTheMiddleEast PeaceToTheMiddleEast
Well hey if he got off before me I would finish the job myself. Sometimes you have to do what you have to do.
01/15/2012
Ryuson Ryuson
He always finishes before I do, but he usually is ready to go again in a few minutes. I agree, don't fake it!
01/15/2012
Gunsmoke Gunsmoke
As a male I learned long ago that the best strategy is to give my girl an orgasm - or 2 before starting my 'run for the roses'.

The dynamics of women often taking longer to become aroused - and their ability to have multiple-orgasms combine to make our strategy the best for both of us.

I get as much from bringing her to multiple orgasms as I do from my own orgasm. Maybe a better way to say it is that my orgasms are more intense when I know she's been taken care off.
01/15/2012
quinceykay quinceykay
Yeah, to me you don't always have to orgasm to enjoy yourself. But be honest about it. It will be worse if he realizes that you're faking it. To me, it's okay if a guy comes before you, as long as he's willing to make sure that you finish and get your own happy ending!
01/15/2012
LAndJ LAndJ
We often try to have me go first from oral or toys, then I'll usually finish him off with oral (it gives him a chance to hold it longer while he's working on me). He's able to go again after his first orgasm, so it solves the issue with both of us having finished at least once.
01/15/2012
ellejay ellejay
I have the same thing with my boyfriend. I just tell the truth and he makes it a point to give me mine later.
01/15/2012
The Curious Couple The Curious Couple
We don't really have this issue. It has happened before, but it's not a problem.
01/15/2012
Gallowraven Gallowraven
Be honest. faking an orgasm is equal to lying to his face. (personal opinion) just talk to him about how you feel, whether or not it bothers you when he gets his first, and talk about maybe finding a way you can both get off, maybe not at the same time, but at least in the same night/day depending on when you get your playtime. communication is the key to great sex.
01/15/2012
Fun with Dick & Jane Fun with Dick & Jane
I agree with Gunsmoke, have him help you through a couple of orgasms first with toys or any other way, then every one for themselves!!!
01/15/2012
Hallmar82 Hallmar82
Let him help you out afterwards if you don't finish on time. If you like using vibes together, let him help you out.
01/15/2012
Elnoa Elnoa
We prefer when he "goes first". That means more fun for me when the pressure is off.
01/16/2012
poetprincess poetprincess
Quote:
Originally posted by MamaDivine
Quite frankly, I feel awful when hubby "goes" before I do, because I know he's going to feel like crap knowing that I didn't "get mine". Honestly, I have fun with or without an orgasm. Its more than that to me. So, should ... More
It can go both ways I know when I have been with my man and he hasnt cum but he has made me cum like three times and then he has went limp after wards. it does not bother him or I, Its and age thing...
01/16/2012
BobbiJay BobbiJay
Talk to him. Maybe you guys could do some foreplay before.
01/16/2012
indiglo indiglo
Don't fake, whatever you do. Talk about it together, in a non-confrontational way. He could do as Gunsmoke mentioned, help you have 1 or 2 via other means before he climaxes, or even after he climaxes. Either way, make sure he knows how you feel and what your needs are. Good partners are always glad to know those things so they can give you what you need.
01/16/2012
Zombirella Zombirella
Quote:
Originally posted by MamaDivine
Quite frankly, I feel awful when hubby "goes" before I do, because I know he's going to feel like crap knowing that I didn't "get mine". Honestly, I have fun with or without an orgasm. Its more than that to me. So, should ... More
I just wish guys would understand that we don't always have to orgasm to get satisfaction. The female G spot is complicated. Some women can only orgasm by clitoral stimulation and so on. Though it's good to be honest I will admit that I have lied about it before just so he won't feel bad afterward. I have been honest and I have told him that just because I didn't "get off" doesn't mean I didn't enjoy it or I don't enjoy him or I'm not attracted to him anymore(or any other crazy reason eh can think up). So many different things affect it, how warm or cold the room is, if I'm tired or not, PMS, had a crappy day, hungry(lol). I just wish I could get my man to accept that. I don't know, guys just orgasm so much easier than women. If your girl REALLY isn't satisfied, I think the guy is going to notice.
01/16/2012
MamaDivine MamaDivine
Quote:
Originally posted by Gunsmoke
As a male I learned long ago that the best strategy is to give my girl an orgasm - or 2 before starting my 'run for the roses'.

The dynamics of women often taking longer to become aroused - and their ability to have multiple-orgasms ... More
Gunsmoke, Can I give you my husbands phone number? I Think you two have to have a talk LMAO. Thanks for the input from a guys point of view! Really helps.
01/17/2012
MamaDivine MamaDivine
Quote:
Originally posted by Zombirella
I just wish guys would understand that we don't always have to orgasm to get satisfaction. The female G spot is complicated. Some women can only orgasm by clitoral stimulation and so on. Though it's good to be honest I will admit that I have ... More
I Completely agree! For me, the closeness, sensuality and skin to skin contact and a good "work out" is just enough for me to feel "satisfied". Thanks for your response!
01/17/2012
MamaDivine MamaDivine
Quote:
Originally posted by MamaDivine
Quite frankly, I feel awful when hubby "goes" before I do, because I know he's going to feel like crap knowing that I didn't "get mine". Honestly, I have fun with or without an orgasm. Its more than that to me. So, should ... More
My biggest thing about having an orgasm or two before he goes.....Honestly, Im way too sensitive to go after Ive had one orgasm. He's the same way, so usually that "one orgasm" is all that is had. Not that we don't WANT to go again, its just that we both feel sexually satisfied after that first go round. Which kind of frustrates us both because we WANT to keep going. I guess we're just going to have to try some "hold off" techniques to prolong our experiences lol. I guess I should have mentioned that before hand LOL. All in all, we have a pretty satisfying sex life. (especially since I started with EF LOL). Its funny because he is "new" to the toy world and I used to do in-home parties with them. So its kind of fun for me to "introduce" him into this stuff. Thank you everyone for your comments and advice! I really appreciate it. Its nice to know I have somewhere to go for this kind of stuff. Granted, I can talk to him about it, but its nice to get ideas and advice from an "outside view". Thanks again!
01/17/2012
married with children married with children
I would not lie to him. Just be honest and talk about it.
01/17/2012
Kitka Kitka
Honesty is always best
01/17/2012
punkstar283 punkstar283
Quote:
Originally posted by MamaDivine
Quite frankly, I feel awful when hubby "goes" before I do, because I know he's going to feel like crap knowing that I didn't "get mine". Honestly, I have fun with or without an orgasm. Its more than that to me. So, should ... More
Never have this issue
01/17/2012
Brandonn Brandonn
Never fake it.
01/19/2012
shySEXXaddict shySEXXaddict
Quote:
Originally posted by MamaDivine
Quite frankly, I feel awful when hubby "goes" before I do, because I know he's going to feel like crap knowing that I didn't "get mine". Honestly, I have fun with or without an orgasm. Its more than that to me. So, should ... More
be honest!im sure theres times you get off before he does or he might not at all.id be straight up with him because if he finds out down the road youve been faking it will make him even more upset wondering if youve faked it everytime..u no what i mean?
01/19/2012
Anjulie Anjulie
Quote:
Originally posted by Chirple
I'd talk to him about how you feel, and if he wants to do more to give you orgasms, give him some tips !

Faking it just... it just seems like such a terrible thing to do.
Agreed
01/19/2012
John E W John E W
Don't fake it. Be honest. Sex is meant to be good without complications!!
01/19/2012
RonLee RonLee
Your husband has no tongue, no fingers??? You're posting on EF... you have no toys??? Just because he's cum first shouldn't stop the fun.
01/20/2012
MamaDivine MamaDivine
Quote:
Originally posted by RonLee
Your husband has no tongue, no fingers??? You're posting on EF... you have no toys??? Just because he's cum first shouldn't stop the fun.
LMAO...Point taken. Ill make notes for him LOL!
01/26/2012
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Total posts: 49
Unique posters: 45