How do you relax and allow the orgasm happen

This is my wife’s all time favorite toy. She uses only one of the five attachments which came as a set (2 deluxe). The attachment is called grapes I believe. It's double sided, so the opposite side has another name. The grapes is small with half round smooth nubs. She usually leaves it on the low setting while I'm inside her while she is building up. She lays still on her back while looking up. I can watch the waves of sensations rolling over her. I am not real active, so as to not distract her. She tells me when it's time, and she usually drops the Eroscillator to the bedside just before she climaxes. She just explodes and quivers with ecstasy. This works consistently for her. Though we have other toys and other variations of moves, it is the Eroscillator which always sends her over the top, so to speak.

Maybe being filled up is part of what works for my wife. So, if you don't have a penis to fill you while using your Eroscillator, I would suggest maybe a quality dildo like Vixskin might work.

These comments are obviously from my perspective, being a male. I have heard from other reviews that some women achieved climaxing from the soft finger attachment when none of the others worked. It is only available as a separate accessory. I think it's $39.95. Best of luck.