Do you prefer a partner or solo?

The New Intimacy

Do you prefer a partner or solo?

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Contributor: chantalgiardina chantalgiardina
I was never really into masturbation until about 2 years ago. Recently I feel as if I would rather masturbate and please myself than to actually have to have sex with my hubby.
I'm still giving into his wishes, but in the back of my head I'm more like " hurry up get it over with" which makes me feel horrible. We have always had such a huge sexual connection but here recently I feel like a totally different person when it comes to sex.
I don't know if it's hormonal changes or maybe just a period I am going through or what.. any insight would be nice.
06/07/2012
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Contributor: js250 js250
Has your husband upset you outside of the bedroom? You could be carrying this over to the bedroom, I do. You need to really think about what it is that triggered this change. If you are satisfying yourself 'better' through use of toys, then maybe it is time to incorporate him into the toy sessions and make it a mutual fun session. Teach him through play to grow sexually and not stagnate inside the old routines? It is a bit difficult to answer your post on little info but....maybe one of these will work.
06/07/2012
Contributor: Arch600 Arch600
Quote:
Originally posted by js250
Has your husband upset you outside of the bedroom? You could be carrying this over to the bedroom, I do. You need to really think about what it is that triggered this change. If you are satisfying yourself 'better' through use of toys, then ... more
This is great advice! What happens in the bedroom is often a sign of what's happening - or not - outside the bedroom.

When my wife and I finally were able to discuss masturbation (What? We were shy! ), we both agreed sex and masturbation are two entirely different things; they serve a different purpose. I think we both go through spells when we're tired, or rushed, and it is just easier to masturbate. Sometimes we do it to turn the other on. And then we seem to switch over to not being able to get enough of each other. So yeah, we go through phases.

It only makes sense that your solo sessions are better/more effective. Nobody knows what makes your body tick better than you. But the one thing solo can't compete with is intimacy with your husband. Solo, you focus on your pleasure. Together, focus on his pleasure and enjoy the incredible feeling it is to be the one who can make him feel that way (and I do believe he should be the same with you). I think what may have happened is you're expecting your own sensations and pleasures to be the same as when you take care of yourself.
06/07/2012
Contributor: married with children married with children
I prefer to be with my wife, its alot better then being by myself.

I also agree with js250
06/10/2012