how do you tell your hetero male partner about your toys?

Edeneve Edeneveef Edeneve Edeneveef
how do you tell your hetero male partner about your toys? I know this can be a very touchy subject for guys.
Jan 28, 3:12 pm
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Rin (aka Nire) Rin (aka Nire)
Just curious: are you needing advice or just looking for personal opinions? I can provide the latter better than the former.

In my case I'd just come out and say I like toys when the subject of sex came up - perhaps not immediately, but I'm not really going to stall on the topic since toys are pretty important to me. Since most people who know me know I'm pretty blunt when it comes to stuff like this, I'm not liable to shock anyone.

Most guys I know are fine with toys. If a chap I was interested in was insecure about them, I'd explain that they can bring a lot to both solo and partner play, and that even though toys are awesome they're not the same as the real thing. If he's okay with me using them but not interested in using them together, it's not a deal breaker. If he goes says he never wants me touching another toy, then I drop the fucker like a rock. And then spread the word to other ladies I know that he may attempt to be controlling on the subject.
Jan 28, 4:55 pm
Edeneve Edeneveef Edeneve Edeneveef
Quote:
Originally posted by Rin (aka Nire)
Just curious: are you needing advice or just looking for personal opinions? I can provide the latter better than the former.

In my case I'd just come out and say I like toys when the subject of sex came up - perhaps not immediately, but ... More
thanks for sharing your experience. I'm not really attached to my toys as long as I'm having sex on a regular basis. it would be fun though, if he would like to play w/ them w/ me.
Jan 30, 12:59 pm
blondie blondie
I've only had one guy be uncomfortable with them
Most of the time guys seem to find it a turn on or something
Jan 31, 3:04 am
Gunsmoke Gunsmoke
Since I was the one who bought the toys - my problem was the opposite. How to interest her in toys. However I think the experience can be useful.

I started with a simple clitoral vibe - that helped her achieve orgasm more easily. Once the 'pressure' to have an orgasm was lifted - she actually wanted sex more often. The reason for the discomfort was me - I was determined to make sure she had an orgasm every time and that was sometimes hard for her. As you know - the toys solve that problem rather nicely.

From there we progressed to penetrative vibes, then dildos, then anal toys.

One 'carrot' for your friend might be this; after my wife has her first orgasm with the toys - it is easier for her to have additional orgasms. Sometimes this would lead to the infamous simultaneous orgasm - they are always fun.

A second benefit is that since you/she have already had an orgasm me/he can focus on what it takes for our own orgasm - not having to hold back waiting for our partner. This can be an issue - because most men are one-and-done types and most women are easily capable of multiple orgasms. The toys help level the field.

The next suggestion is to make sex more like play - than some romantic or spiritual pursuit. When you've been together for a long time, passion slips - but the fun must continue. After all - what's playtime without toys?

Ok - enough already - good luck with your friend!
Feb 4, 2:54 pm
Total posts: 5
Unique posters: 4