Honestly, we hardly ever use it. Its one of those things that "its there if we NEED it, but hardly ever do". I would say just dab a little where its needed before things get too involved and go for it! I agree with MWC, its very normal for couples to use lubricants. Or, what you could do is....Maybe buy one of the warming or cooling ones and tell your partner that you'd like to try something to spice it up a lil?