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Bondage, Sex and Rock'n'Roll. BDSM Guidelines.

Sex Guides and Tips
Bondage, just like any other sort of BDSM activity, should tend to be safe, sensible and agreeable for both partners, as much as possible. For those who are now asking themselves: "What exactly bondage means?", here's a short definition: "Bondage - type of sexual activity where one partner is tied up/restrained while the other partner is taking absolute control over him/her". As soon as a partner is restrained, there might follow different sexually exciting types of play, that can vary from feather teasing and tickling to a range of punishment forms, bringing into action such SM accessories as nipple clamps, whips, paddles and other special devices supposed for BDSM pastime. Nevertheless, bondage and other activities from "BDSM family", are nothing else but a stylized way of making secret fantasies come true. The roles, the rules and the limits are usually discussed before hand, thus the bondage play becomes a consensual activity for both partners. Based on Matthias Grimme's researching experience, which he described in his "Das Bondage-Handbuch" book, we have decided to provide you with some basic guidelines that will make your bondage play consensual, sane and safe.

1. Before bondage play starts, you and your partner(s) have to discuss boundaries that shouldn't be crossed, consensuality and aspects of a safe bondage play.

2. Possible health problems, better described in our article: "Risks Associated with Bondage or SM Play: Medical or Environmental Emergencies and Withholding Information", should also be discussed before diving into the bondage sensations pool. It is strongly recommended to "come clean" in case you have some blood circulation problems, breathing problems and also poor heart conditions, so in case one of the partners faints and needs medical assistance, you know exactly how react. The responsibility of telling all this information lies on both partners, so be honest to each other.

3. Also, before engaging into some kinky bondage play, make sure you confessed each other about your STDs, in case you have any. It's rather important, especially when you intend to engage into a play that involves a sexual contact. In this case, please, have at hand appropriate protection (e.g. condoms, dental dams, etc.), to be on the safe side. And don't forget of a proper lubricant too.

4. Do NOT use alcohol and drugs before and during the bondage play. It reduces motor control, delays prompt reaction, dims sensibility and reflexes, which eventually may bring you (or your partner) to spasmodic behavior or spontaneous changes of reaction.
 
So, remember, drugs and alcohol can NOT go together with bondage or any other SM games. If you're looking forward for some naughty bondage play with adequate reactions of your partner(s), you'll have to choose: either BDSM play or drugs and booze. You can find more information on that in our special article: "Risks Associated with Bondage or SM Play: Too Tight Bondage and Intoxication".

5. After discussing things mentioned in the points above, before progressing into the bondage play itself, check if your partner (as well as you) is clear with fixed limitations, directions and rules, according to which the bondage play is going to take place. Pay attention to details and ask what's the "script"? - is it supposed to be a sophisticated way of making fetish dreams come true? or maybe your partner wants a sensual light BDSM teasing play? or a subliminal Master & Slave power play? Whatever you choose, fix a signal (a sound, a word, a gesture) which is going to mean that the "line" was crossed and you'd better stop before making that play way too uncomfortable and unacceptable for your partner.

6. As it was mentioned above, it is very easy to proceed further if you have a clearly identified direction of your BDSM session. Fetish? Punishment? Work of art? Power play with role changing? Picking a certain route from the very beginning will help you to concentrate on maximum during the play.

7. Equipment and sex toys. Though you know they're in good condition, check over them once again to be on the safe side that nothing unpredictable happens within bondage session. Do NOT use bondage accessories, toys, materials and equipment that are in poor state, as it may lead to injuries either for your partner or for yourself. In case you're using new/updated bondage toys or/and accessories, make sure you know what they are up to and get to know them better before introducing them to your partner.

8. So, you have checked the equipment and everything looks OK. Now prepare a "get loose kit" with proper devices in it that correspond to the equipment you want to use for your SM and bondage play. (E.g. If you're using a rope to restrain your partner, have at hand a sharp-bladed knife or some EMT scissors to cut the rope in case of emergency.)

9. If you're "playing at home" make sure the "field" and all the other conditions, concerning your "game", look all right. Pay attention to the room temperature, the ambiance to be according to what you have intended/prepared to do, make sure you have allocated enough time to finish the "game" and that nobody is going to disturb you once you've started.