A Handy-Dandy Guide to Penis Pumps: For Men

Release Valve

Third, the release valve: This is a small inconspicuous part of the pump, but it is a very vital part nonetheless. The release valve is most often located on the pump mechanism. Again, consider for a moment what's about to happen when you use a penis pump; you will create a vacuum around your willie. If you're a novice, or even if you're an old hand at pumping, your best friend will be the release valve. This will help prevent you from injuring yourself through your inexperience or by overuse. So lesson number three: When purchasing a penis pump look for a release valve that is easy to locate, easy to use, but sturdy enough to last. Remember, you will be using the release valve with each use of the pump. If that puppy leaks or wears out, that's the end of that.

Now that we have the basics down, let's look at things a little more closely. Let's first consider the different kinds of pump mechanisms.

Telescoping travel pump™
Telescoping travel pump™

The squeeze bulb type - like the Telescoping Travel Pump. This is about as basic a unit as you can get. The bulb pump mechanism attaches directly to the cylinder. There is no hose. The release valve is prominent, easy to find, and located immediately under the bulb as it attaches to the chamber.

One armed bandit pump
One armed bandit pump

The piston type - like the One Armed Bandit Pump. Here we have an intermediate type of set up. Besides the difference in pump mechanism, this one attaches to the cylinder by way of a flexible hose. The release valve is easy to find and located immediately under the finger-operated plunger/piston as it attaches to the hose.

Remote plunger pump
Remote plunger pump

The plunger type - like the Remote Plunger Pump. This is a basic setup like the one above, but here one creates the vacuum by pushing down on the plunger. Since I've not been able to review this model, I can't report on the release valve.

Total erection system
Total erection system

The handgrip type - like the Total Erection System. This is a considerably more elaborate system that kicks things up a notch. Besides the difference in pump mechanism, this one has a gauge attachment. The release valve is prominent, easy to find, and located in the housing immediately under the gauge.

Basic Megavac Electric Vacuum Pump
Basic Megavac Electric Vacuum Pump

The motorized type - like the Basic Megavac Electric Vacuum Pump. Now we're gettin' into the serious industrial strength pump mechanisms. They claim that this momma is more efficient because it creates a continuous, even flow of vacuum pressure. It also has a variable-pulsation feature that only an electric pump can provide. Since I've not been able to review one of these contraptions, I can't report on the release valve.

Before we get to some of the bells and whistles offered by some penis pumps, there's one more basic thing I want to call your attention to. If you're lookin' to buy a pump that will last, take note of how the pump apparatus connects to the vacuum cylinder. The more secure the connection, the stronger and more long-lasting the vacuum. Some of the pumps have a simple hose-to-cylinder connection; the plastic hose, or squeeze bulb device, attaches to the cylinder by forcing one piece of plastic (the hose) over another (the plastic connector). When the pump is new, the connection is tight. However, regular use and cleaning will take their toll. If you use lube with your pump, it could also compromise the connection by getting sucked up into the hose. And when the connection fails, you'll not get the airtight seal you want… and need.

The more advanced penis pumps have a sophisticated coupling device that locks the male (hose) and female (cylinder) ends together making a secure seal. What's so great about this setup is it allows the pumper to disconnect the hose and pump mechanism from the cylinder; leaving the airtight seal in place on your cock. This feature will come in handy if you choose to one day add weights to your pumping device, or if you want to use other attachments. But I am getting ahead of myself.