The Masseuse 3 by Digital Playground - review by Miss Voluptuous

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I suppose that sex is a kind of massage...

For a film called Masseuse 3, there is almost no massage in this flick. The one massage scene is not a prelude to sex. The most I can figure is two people playing masseuses (Scott Nails and James Deen) have scenes in this film. The real star is Kayden Kross who plays a delusional woman. There is a little plot stringing these straight vanilla sex scenes together, but mostly it is what it is: porn.
Published:
Pros:
Mick Blue's accent and hot blue eyes, some funny dialogue
Cons:
Uninspiring and a little boring
Rating by reviewer:
2
extremely useful review
The Masseuse opens with footage of Kayden Kross stalking her pray: an unsuspecting masseuse (Scott Nails) who thought he was coming to her home to deliver a massage. He ends up delivering more than that after her military interrogations. He presents her with his massive cock and mediocre oral services. Though the sex was uninspiring, I did enjoy a shot where he was sitting on the couch with her standing on his knees. Kayden squatted over his furiously thrusting cock while playing with her clit.

After a long long time the scene suddenly cuts to a couple (Yurizan Beltran and Toni Ribas) tonguing in a most disgusting way. Many of the make out scenes in this film gave me the feeling of not wanting to watch, kind of like when drunk teenagers are making out on the bus right beside you. I found this second scene frustrating, because for a plot-based porno this scene has zero introduction. We are only clued into the significance of their fucking at the end. They exit the room and pass by Samantha Ryan who is sitting on the couch. She makes a tear into Toni, because the man is her partner and was just cheating on her.

We follow Samantha Ryan into the next scene when she is in a rec room talking with James Deen who has come relieve some of her tensions with a massage. She bitches and moans about her cheating partner while he stands around being awkward. The mood turns romantic when she starts talking about the benefits of "a well thought-out hand massage." What follows is their foreplay into a semi-fun scene. They do fuck on the pool table as well as standing beside it and on the couch. I enjoyed the setting, but the sex was again uninspired with little connection between performers and a lot of what looked to me like false pleasure. I suppose that the woman scorned got her revenge, in any case.

In the following scene we are in a doctors office where the doctor (Mick Blue) and his wife are discussing an upcoming pool party. The wife (Francesca Le) then convinces the doctor to take a 15 minute fuck break which ends up taking much longer than that. They make out for a while, then she goes down on him for quite an extended blow job. As is to be expected, she is talented at this, but it doesn't take away the fact that these two performers have little chemistry. Sure, to some that might be besides the point when watching a XXX movie, but not for me. (Especially when the characters are supposed to be a married couple having spontaneous office sex.) He then turns around and gives her some lame-looking head with lots of tongue flicking while she pretends to go wild from it. One redeeming factor is getting to see her cunt up close. Francesca has a very beautiful pussy with dark hair and very dark lips. Various PIV acts ensue.

That poor lady waiting outside the door happens to be Kayden Kross. She finally goes in for her appointment and it is revealed that she has some delusional problems. The doctor goes to her house for closer monitoring and ends up committing a massive breach of doctor-patient protocol. You know, the part that says not to get romantically involved with your patients? He sucks her tits and other things as well. This final scene involves a lot of close up shots of the penis in the vagina, cutting back to close ups of the performers' faces, then back to their crotches.

The scenes in Masseuse 3 are long, something that is not a benefit in my books. When the sex is excellent of course I want to see long scenes, but with mediocre sex like that in this film I prefer it cut short.

Special Features include Behind the Scenes, Gallery, Slideshow and Trailers. There are two discs in this set, one DVD and one Blu-ray disc. Masseuse 3 was shot in HD by Digital Playground.
Follow-up commentary
I won't be re-visiting this one, as it didn't turn me on the first time. I may have been a bit more interested if the plot were more interesting. This is episode three in a series after all. Unfortunately the plot and the sex both left me wanting. Oh well!
This product was provided free of charge to the reviewer. This review is in compliance with the FTC guidelines.
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Comments
  • married with children
    married with children  
    great review, thanks. All the reviews on this one have been low. I think this will be one I will pass on.
  • Miss Voluptuous
    Miss Voluptuous  
    Thanks for reading, sloppy donkey. Yea... I wouldn't really recommend this one.
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