Pirates Pirates

DVD by Digital Playground

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Yo Ho Ho

I really enjoyed this and wished I had gotten it sooner. There was mostly plot to this movie, with about 5 minutes of sex scenes thrown in here and there. The scenes were typical porn, and they got me aroused. But if I was wanting to masturbate, they would be too short before moving back into the plot. The cast did a great job, they had some really funny lines, and the movie was well done for a porn.
Published:
Pros:
Great lines, Evan hilarious as a goof, good plot.
Cons:
Sex in movie short especially in first few scenes, no full sex scenes on other disks.
Rating by reviewer:
5
extremely useful review
Pirates
Directed by Joone
Produced by Samantha Lewis & Joone and Adam & Eve

Staring
Jesse Jane, Carmen Luvana, Janine, Teagan Presley, Devon, Austyn Moore, Jenaveve Jolie, Evan Stone, Tommy Gunn, Steven St. Croix, Kris Slater.

Disk 1 Menu
Chapter Index, Special Features, Audio, Contact, Resume, and Play Movie. It is a basic menu with music in the background, with pictures of Janine and Jesse.

Disk 2 Menu
Behind the Scenes, Bloopers, Inspirations to Pirates, Photo Gallery, Trailers, Behind the Fx, Pirates Trailer, Bios, and Audition Video.

The BTS was 20 minutes long. It was just long enough to let you see the performers and how they felt during the movie, and I enjoyed it.

Disk 3
All that disk 3 contains is music from the movie. I believe it was 12 tracks.


Feature Presentation
The movie starts right in with the action between Kris and Carmen. They have just been married, and she comes out from behind the curtain after she has finished dressing. He then immediately removes her clothes, plays with her breasts for a moment, and then starts cunnilingus. Then they cut away to him receiving fellatio, before her is pounding her doggy style. He pulls out for the cumshot on her pussy after only 5 minutes of action. The crew must not be paying attention, as a pirate ship with Janine and Tommy at the helm come up behind them. Without much of a fight, the pirates take the ship. They shove Carmen overboard and capture Kris, then leave the ship and sink her.

Now we find Evan on his ship, and his first mate Jesse. Jesse is keeping the mens spirits up by giving them oral lessons, oh my! After a minute or so of this, she is on her back receiving cunnilingus, before the mystery man starts PIV sex. Move to her on top bouncing away, and then the cumshot to her face. This scene also lasted 5 minutes.

Now we find out the Captain Evan is not confident in his abilities as Captain, and Jesse tries to get his spirits up. After the pep talk, they find something in the water, or someone. They are able to rescue Carmen, who has been floating in the water for a while. They now decide to hunt down Tommy, and go to get supplies on an island. But the pirates are there first, and Janine is searching for an Incan Indian.

Evan easily gets distracted by two wenches (Devon and Teagan), and they take him away to give him info about pirates. Devon and Teagan give a drink to Evan, then take him to bed. Devon shoves her ass into his face, and Teagan pulls out his cock. Then they fight over his cock, and Devon rides him in reverse cowgirl, then takes it in doggy. Then he gives them the cumshot to both their faces while declaring "I am the greatest pirate hunter in the world." This scene lasted 6 minutes.

We then cut to Jesse and Steven fucking with the entire bar being able to hear. First with sex, then with oral for Steven, and back into doggy. Good thing she had part of her clothes still on, because he was using it as a great handhold. Only 4 minutes for this scene.

Evan then finds out that Tommy is on the island and close by, and he runs off to go fight them. Tommy is torturing a priest trying to find the Incan, and kills him when the Incan shows up. Carmen and Wu are walking peacefully, when she gets kidnapped by the pirates. Carmen is then tied up in front of a bunch of pirates, and then Jenaveve pleasures her for the pirates. She starts with cunnilingus, before putting her on the floor and kissing her. At this point, she isn't fighting anymore, and the pirates give a resounding "Argh" in approval. The pirates say some really hilarious things during this part. Now Carmen fingers Jenaveve, and they grind against each other with the pirates chanting them on. "God save the wenches!" 7 minutes for this scene.

Now we find Evan and Jesse tied up in a burning building, but in comes Austyn Moore that tried to throw herself at Evan. But the only way she will release them is if he makes love to her in the burning building. He starts with fingering and licking, and then they switch it up with him receiving fellatio. For once it is right for them to be sweaty with fire licking at their feet. They get to PIV sex, and he gives her the facial cumshot. They get out of the burning building after 6 minutes of sex, and he ties Austyn to a tree since she is a nut case.
Experience
Janine now confronts Tommy, and says he is soft. She says that he has forgotten a basic premise in lust, and orders him to lick her at knife point. She spreads her legs and removes her clothes to give him access. She then licks him, before moving into PIV sex. They get a little rough and knock everything of the table, saucy! Then the typical facial cumshot 4 minutes later.

Carmen and Jesse are talking, and they quickly move into being naked and touching each other. They roughly grab each other, slap, fondle and curse. Carmen gets fingered first, then licked. Now it's Jesse's turn for fingering, and her anal fingering is the first anal play of the movie. This scene was 5 minutes long.

Evan's ship finds the island, and they find that Tommy's ship is there first. Evan, Jesse and Carmen then go ashore, and leave one man with the dingy. Tommy finds the scepter that he is looking for, and the others catch up to him at this moment. Out comes the skeletons which Tommy now controls, and the others, including Janine who was turned against, now fight them. Carmen gives a good kick to a crotch, Jesse's boob pops out as she pistol whips one, Janine cuts off its arms, and Evan drives it through one's stomach. But of course his blade gets stuck. The skeletons chase them, but they barely get away. Now we have a ship showoff with the cannon battle. But Evan's cannons don't fire. Second round works better, and they sink Tommy's ship. Wu "thinks I shit in my pants!"

Carmen now confesses that she was unfaithful, but Kris is not upset, and he gets invited to join in on the next round of girl on girl action. They quickly celebrate being back together, with PIV sex, fellatio, and the cumshot to her neck. Only 5 more minutes of action.

Jesse goes to comfort Janine after she was crossed by Tommy, and comfort her she does. It starts slowly with a light kiss, then moves to them naked and Jesse sucking Janine's breast, then Janine licking Jesse. Jesse then licks Janine as she inserts a finger into her own ass. Now Janine shoves a lit candle into Jesse. Watch that wax! 7 minutes of girl on girl.

Conclusion
Overall, a great movie. The performers were great, the costumes were great, and the lines were hilarious. I would deduct a half star for the short sex scenes and the lack of the ability to watch them fully, but that is my only con. I am looking forward to ordering and watching the second one soon.
Follow-up commentary
I enjoyed this one so much, that I quickly placed another order and watched Stagnetti's Revenge just a week or so later. While some of the sex scenes are aggressive with the action, I think with the movie being focused more on plot that sex, that it would make it a great watch for someone new or shy to porn.
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Comments
  • TameTemptress
    TameTemptress  
    I am so torn on wanting this or not!
  • leatherlover
    leatherlover  
    If you aren't wanting it for masturbation purposes, or you really enjoy the cast, I say it is a great purchase. I wish I would have gotten it sooner.
  • LilLostLenore
    LilLostLenore  
    ive only watched the r rated version of this you can rent it at blockbuster video. lol. but i want to see the xxx version as well.
  • leatherlover
    leatherlover  
    Thanks for reading. I had the R rated version on my netflix list, but just decided to see the xxx version instead.
  • fromazoo
    fromazoo  
    Great review!
  • leatherlover
    leatherlover  
    Thanks for reading.
  • Lindsey123
    Lindsey123  
    thanks!
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