Penis Cookies FTW!

While metal cookie cutters might last longer than these, for the price it's no big deal if they only last a year or two. They're well made and will make cookie after cookie after cookie. The only real downside is that the larger two are too big to be of any practical use, instead they'd be a lot better for a centerpiece or something like that. Either way, well worth the purchase!
Published:
Pros
Big cookies, Well made plastic cutters, Easy to figure out and use
Cons
Bigger sizes are too big to be practical
Rating by reviewer:
4
extremely useful review
I love novelty items, and I love sharing them with my friends. Penis cookies seemed like a logical step in that evolution, and would also let me share some themed baked goods at bachelorette parties.

The package that these came in looks like it belongs at Spencers. The three cookie cutters are inside a plastic bubble with a cardboard back. The front of the package says "pecker cookie cutter" and the back has no real information on anything either. That means no use or cleaning instructions either. To clean them, I'd wash by hand in the sink with warm soapy water. You could also try running them through the top rack of your dishwasher as well. If they warp slightly it's not a big deal since they're so flexible, you'll still be able to get a good shape from them.

The cutters themselves come in 3 different sizes and are made of a sturdy yet flexible plastic in a lovely shade of purple. The smallest penis you get is about 7" tall from the bottom of the balls to the top of the head, 4 1/4" wide across the balls, and 1 1/2" wide at the base of the head. The medium one is about 9" tall, and about 5 1/2" and 2 1/4" wide. The largest one is just about 10 1/2" tall, and just over 6 1/2" and 2 1/2" wide. If you're looking for a good quantity of cookies, your best bet is to use the smallest one. The large one should really be left to be used as a centerpiece.



The best dough to be used for these is sugar cookie dough, although anything that you can roll out should work as well. I had a hard time getting the dough shapes from the cutting board to the baking sheet, especially for the larger ones. What I ended up doing that might also be useful for you is to roll out the dough and cut your shapes on a piece of wax paper on the cutting board/counter/wherever. Then you can move just the shapes over to the baking sheet and transfer them right there. You can either carefully move them with your hands or spatulas, or you can carefully flip the wax paper over and peel it off the back of the cookie.



After they were done baking, I let them sit for a little while and had almost an equally hard time getting them off the sheets. The smaller ones weren't so bad, but that big one took two of us to get off in one piece, and even then it had a big crack when we finally set it down. Because we would have gotten a lot more whole cookies if we had a flat sheet with no edges, I recommend those for these so you can slide them right off.

Experience
I really had been wanting these for a while. Every now and then I go ahead and treat myself to things I've been wanting to buy, but just haven't yet for whatever reason. Well, my best friend was over the night they showed up and we stayed up until about midnight making penis cookies. It was a total blast, and we got to make so many penis jokes. My mom was the real hero of the night, coming up with the great ideas that made it possible to get the dough from the board to the sheet. I can bake well, but doughs that require rolling just don't seem to get along with me very well. Either way, I'm really glad I own these, and I do believe I'll be making penis cookies for a long time to come.
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  • Contributor: geliebt
    Wow, they are huge! Thank you kindly for the review!
  • Contributor: Jul!a
    Thank you kindly for reading!
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