Ooh Look, Shiny Baubles...

They could be great for a first-timer, but ultimately you could do a lot better. The materials are pretty inexpensive, but they are functional and do their job decently. Unless you really like the feeling of being closed in...Overall, one star for functionality.
Published:
Pros
Shiny, functional.
Cons
Basic nylon straps, Velcro closing, not very comfortable, cheaply made.
Rating by reviewer:
1
useful review

Use

Tying people up is the obvious use! The box shows a scantily clad lady with her wrists anchored to her thighs - but there are SO many more ways you can do this. You can clip both wrists together, or both thighs together (although clipping the thighs together doesn't do much, honestly. I could still walk around just fine, but...maybe underneath a skirt?) You could cross them, and link your right hand to your left thigh with your left hand to your right thigh, or just start anchoring the pieces to rope tied to the bed, or...you know. Feel free to get creative, these are flexible.
  • Who / How / What
    [ ? ]
    Who might this product be best for? How is it best used? What are the best circumstances or situations for using this product?
    • Bdsm
    • Light restraint
  • Where
    [ ? ]
    Where / what types of places can this product be used?
    • Anywhere
    • Bedroom / on a bed
    • Play party

Design / Craftsmanship / Material / Size / Fit

Design wise, these are pretty basic, but a clever good design. These have a lot of flexibility, as mentioned above, but the execution of the design kinda falls flat on its face. The straps are made of standard nylon straps - the kind you'd find in a hardware store or tying a sleeping bag to a a backpack. They're honestly nothing special, on first glance. There are no buckles here - its just long strips of Velcro as the closing mechanism. The wrist cuffs are pretty generous, I had to tighten them down real tight and I have average wrists. The thigh straps on the other hand, I only had about 3" extra left - so while the wrist cuffs can be worn by sturdy peasant women, the thigh cuffs should probably be used by the skinny nobles. The box mentions "Wrist adjusts up to 11.5"/29 cm, Thigh adjusts up to 27.75"/65 cm." There's not much comfort in these either - to get the thigh cuffs to not slip down, I had to tighten them pretty securely, and by then the Velcro either rubbed or the nylon didn't have enough give while I was moving to stay with my body.

As far as the metal parts go...they were relatively standard. No real spot to put a lock on, unless you used a lock instead of the supplied hardware links. Most of the hardware was pretty average metal clasps you'd find in a hardware store.

But shiney! Even though they're made from ordinary nylon cord, the crystals add a little bit of flair to catch the eye.
    • Minimal
    • Velcro

Performance

Compared to some leather shackles from Spartacus, these are going to remain in the bottom of the toy box - unless maybe I needed another pair for some reason. They're not top level of comfort, due to the simple 1" nylon without any padding. Decently strong, the weak point is in the Velcro - you could probably tear yourself out of these easily without a whole lot of work. If you want just a simple, no-brains beginner set of restraints, this is probably where its at.
    • Chafes
    • Easy to put on / use

Care and Maintenance

From my hiking activities, this kind of material is definitely weather and water resistant, but if you get it real dirty it can be a challenge to clean. Luckily this looks perfectly appropriate to throw in the laundry - and to an untrained eye, they probably look like a fancy dog leash or something if you were pulling it out of the dryer. The metal can be polished, but these kind of parts are easily replaceable with a couple dollars at a hardware store.
    • Easy to store

Packaging

The box is definitely not subtle! It has two pictures, front and back, of a scantily clad woman wearing these. Its a simple cardboard box, and inside the cuffs are folded and packed in plastic and sealed. There is a bit of a smell when you first open it, from the nylon, but the smell disappeared within a couple hours of having them out. No instructions, but they're really easy to figure out. Strap here, strap there, clip, done.
    • Not discreet

Personal comments

Overall they're functionally alright - but you could do a LOT better. Maybe for someone's first set of restraints...
Follow-up commentary
Still very cheaply made and really ineffectual restraint. Sits in my closet and I don't even bother with it. The velcro and the idea of a thigh restraint without any grip to it just means it slides right off my leg.
This product was provided free of charge to the reviewer. This review is in compliance with the FTC guidelines.

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Comments
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  • Contributor: Kayla
    They look kinda cute. Too bad they don't work too well.
  • Contributor: J's Alley
    Holy crap! 27" thighs! Wow, I have 26.5 inch thighs and I am not at all large (more like a hobbit really). Those thigh restraints are crazy small...so much for one size fits all.
  • Contributor: Lady Neshamah
    great review
  • Contributor: Pete's Princess
    Thanks!
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