I May Not Be a Tomboy But I Love This Harness!

The Tomboi harness by SpareParts is a good choice for a panty-style harness. It's more comfortable than an adjustable leather harness and much easier to fit underneath clothing. SpareParts put a lot of thought and work into this harness, and it shows. The quality and durability of it is great. Tomboi holds toys perfectly into place and appears much more discreet than a leather harness. Unfortunately, the sizing is pretty off. I also found the mesh pouch in the crotch a bit bulky.
Published:
Pros
appearance, comfortable, holds toys well, discreet, good packaging
Cons
sizing, mesh pouch in crotch is a bit bulky
Rating by reviewer:
4
extremely useful review

Use

The Tomboi harness is a panty style harness that is great for both strap-on play and packing. It fits just like regular underwear, so it can be worn underneath clothing for as long as you'd like. It doesn't need to be adjusted or buckled, just slide it on.

Due to the ease of putting the harness on and the comfortable fit of it, I think the harness would be great for beginners. It's easy to slip a strap on dildo through the O-ring. Advanced users may prefer a different style harness due to the fact that the O-ring in Tomboi cannot be changed out for a larger size.

Tomboi's style leans more towards masculine, however the fit of the harness is gender neutral. It's cut in the style of male briefs. The style can be used for gender play. I personally do not use it for gender play, I just use it as a harness.

Since Tomboi is made out of fabric rather than leather, the harness can be taken into the shower or tub if you'd like. The ease of storing it also make it great to pack and take with you when travelling.
  • Who / How / What
    [ ? ]
    Who might this product be best for? How is it best used? What are the best circumstances or situations for using this product?
    • Gender play
    • Pegging
    • Strap-on sex
  • Where
    [ ? ]
    Where / what types of places can this product be used?
    • Tub/shower/pool
  • Features
    [ ? ]
    What kind of features does this product offer?
    • Travel friendly

Material

According to the tag inside of the harness, Tomboi is made out of 77% nylon and 23% spandex. The material feels very soft and smooth, almost like microfiber. It's also very stretchy. No matter how much the material is stretched, it is not see-through. The material is as thick as that of a swimsuit. It's just a little bit thicker than regular underwear material.

The crotch does not have a liner. Instead it has a black mesh pouch. The mesh feels a little rough, especially compared to the rest of the harness.

Right out of the packaging I did not notice any scent to the harness. If yours happens to have any scent to it, washing it should remove it.

Like I stated above, the harness is waterproof. It is not made of leather or anything that should not be put in water. The materials used are typical fabrics that can be found on other clothing. Since it's not made of leather, it's also vegan-friendly.
    • Mixed materials
    • Smooth
    • Vegan

Design / Craftsmanship

Tomboi closely resembles a pair of male briefs in appearance. The waistband is wide, measuring in at almost 2 inches. It's black and has SpareParts written on it in black as well. The back of the waistband has the name of the harness on it, with "Tom" on the inside and "boi" on the outside.

The harness is mainly made out of a soft, stretchy red material. It feels similar to a swimsuit or microfiber. Detailing is done in the same material, except black in color. The leg openings are lined with black trim. The front, where the fly would be located on normal briefs, also has two pieces of black material as trim. They do not operate as a normal fly would. Between these two pieces of trim is the O-ring.

The O-ring sits against my pubic bone when I wear the harness. Compared to other harnesses, the O-ring sits a bit lower than the leather harnesses I have. However, Tomboi positions your dildo to sit exactly where a penis would sit on a man, making it look natural and more realistic. It's not very big, so it's not going to fit a wide range of dildo sizes. See my Performance section for more on dildo sizes and the O-ring.

Inside the crotch of the harness, there is a small mesh pouch. SpareParts says this is used to hold bullet toys in place. I think you may also be able to use it to hold onto a toy inserted into your body if you desire. It also works to hold the balls of your dildo (if it has them) in place. I personally don't really care for the mesh pouch. It feels a bit awkward against my body and takes a bit of playing around with to get it into the most comfortable spot. I will only be using this pouch if my dildo happens to have balls on it.

I chose size medium when deciding which size to order. Here's a chart of the measurements of the harness both unstretched and stretched as far as I can get them:

Waistband: 24/36 inches
Hip: 30/42 inches
Leg opening: 20/26 inches
Rise: 6 1/2 inches

Compared to a regular panty, these fit pretty normal. They sit on my lower hips. The waistband helps to hold in my hips, which makes them look a bit slimmer. I'd like to note that the maximum amount of stretch I can get out of the waistband is 36 inches around. If you're over 35 1/2 inches around at your hips, I strongly suggest going up a size. There's more on the size and fit of these below.

I think the quality of Tomboi is pretty good. There aren't any issues with construction that I can see. Tomboi feels very strong and durable. I definitely think it will be lasting me quite a while. While the price of Tomboi is pretty high, the harness you'll receive is very high quality and well thought out by the manufacturer.
    • Discreet look/design
    • Stylish
    • Well made / sturdy

Size / Fit

When deciding what size I would need, I ended up looking the information up on Google. While the packaging provides information to help with sizing, the product page on Eden does not. The size chart for the harness is as follows:

Size XS - Lower waist/hips: 26 - 28 inches (66 - 71 cm)
Size S - Lower waist/hips: 29 - 32 inches (73 - 81 cm)
Size M - Lower waist/hips: 33 - 37 inches (83 - 94 cm)
Size L - Lower waist/hips: 38 - 40 inches (96 - 101 cm)
Size XL - Lower waist/hips: 41 - 44 inches (104 - 111 cm)
Size 2X - Lower waist/hips: 45 - 48 inches (114 - 122 cm)
Size 3X - Lower waist/hips: 49 - 52 inches (124 - 132 cm)

Using that chart, I decided to order size medium. My hips measure 35 inches around, so I thought they'd fit perfectly if the chart matches the actual harness properly.

Unfortunately, these fit quite a bit tighter than I was expecting. The material felt pretty tight against my butt and hips. It didn't cause a muffin top, though. It also did not feel binding against my thighs and did not chafe me. It was just a lot tighter of a fit than I am used to in underwear. I normally wear a size 5 or small in underwear.

When I put these on, they sat low on my hips. I've never worn a male brief before, so I can't really compare the fit to regular briefs. Aside from the tightness, they felt comfortable. The wide waistband felt comfortable and did not cut into my skin. The back of the harness completely covered my butt. Despite all of the extra mesh in the crotch, I did not notice any bagginess or bulging in the harness. They should fit fine underneath clothing. If you wear them under leggings or other pants with thin material, you may have some panty lines and a mark where the O-ring sits, but other than that these should work well.

I don't think the size medium would fit any larger than 35 inch hips. I think if you measure between 31 and 35 inches you should fit in this pair. I definitely recommend going a size up if you measure at the higher end of the range for each size.

I'd like to note that, while Eden does not have sizes XXS, 4X, and 5X, some other websites state that they have these sizes available as a special request. I think the size range is pretty good. Most people should be able to find a size that will fit them pretty well.
    • Can be worn under clothing
    • Fits comfortably

Performance

Since this is a panty-style harness, it's much easier to put on wear around than adjustable harnesses. Slipping it on takes almost no time at all. From there, you'll just pick your dildo or packer and slip it through the O-ring. I personally have not worn it out and about yet, however I do expect it will be worn on our next date night. Aside from it being a bit too tight for my tastes, Tomboi is the perfect style for me: low rise, covers my butt, has a soft waistband, and the material stretches.



My only issue with the performance of Tomboi is the O-ring. Other harnesses have a removable O-ring that lets you use any size toy you want. This O-ring is not interchangeable. According to the packaging, it should fit toys with a diameter between 1 1/4 inches and 2 1/4 inches or with a circumference between 3.92 inches and 7.07 inches.

Most of my dildos are slim and not very long. They are used for anal penetration on my fiance. The dildo I chose to use with Tomboi is Vamp, which measures 1 1/2 inches in diameter. I also have Acute, which is slightly smaller, and Buzz 1, which has the same diameter as Vamp. We have a couple other smaller dildos and anal toys floating around that can be used with a harness, but they aren't any of our "regulars".

I had a slightly difficult time getting Vamp into the O-ring. The head is larger than the shaft. The O-ring just did not seem to want to stretch enough to get the head through. I was finally able to get it through. The shaft slid through the O-ring much better. I did notice that the flaps of mesh inside the crotch kept trying to come through the O-ring as I would push a dildo through the ring. Unfortunately, by the time I finally wrestled Vamp into place, it was covered in cat hair and lint and stuff from me holding it against my body.

Even though the O-ring says it will fit a decent range of toy sizes, it won't. I am unable to stretch the ring at all. I don't think it will fit any toys larger than 1 1/2 inches in diameter.

The O-ring and the harness itself do offer great hold on toys. I had no issue with toys sliding around or pulling out of the harness. The tight fit of Tomboi even helped hold dildos more steady for me, which made insertion with them much easier.

Since Tomboi is not bulky like regular adjustable harnesses it is easier to maneuver your body into different positions while your dildo remains steady. Even laying on your back, your dildo will be held straight and steady. I noticed no chafing when moving around with the harness on.

Removal of toys from Tomboi gets very...messy. Since the O-ring is so tight, any lube and other little bits that are on the dildo will get pushed onto the harness. If your dildo is difficult to clean due to lots of crevices or something, you'll end up with hands covered in lube and whatnot. I strongly recommend wiping down toys with toy cleaner before attempting to remove them from the harness. Once that's done, you'll want to make sure to wash the harness before putting it on again.
    • Comfortable during use
    • Holds toys very well
    • Easy to put on

Care and Maintenance

According to Tomboi's packaging, it can be thrown into the washer to clean. The harness is pretty sturdy, so I feel it should make it through a washer, especially if it's a front load washer that does not have an agitator. If you prefer, you can also hand wash the harness in the sink. Tomboi can be thrown into the dryer on a low temperature tumble dry cycle or it can be hung up to dry. A high heat cycle may cause the harness to shrink.

Storing it is pretty easy. It can be folded up like underwear and stored in with other underthings. You can also store it in the original box or the included storage pouch. I decided to use the box to store a few plastic vibrating bullets, so mine will be stored in the pouch.

Tomboi is only compatible with water and silicone based lubricants. The packaging states not to use oil based lubricants. I am guessing that oil based lubes would stain the material.
    • Easy to clean
    • Easy to store

Packaging

Tomboi arrives packaged in a small, really cute box. The box itself is plain black paperboard. It has a small paperboard sleeve over it that has some information on it. One side displays the size of the harness inside of the packaging and has a size chart displaying the hip measurements for each size in inches and centimeters. There is also information on the size of the O-ring. The back lists a few of Tomboi's strong points, like how it's waterproof, lightweight material, and easy to slip on. The remaining side displays the care instructions for the harness and lists what's included in the box. The whole package is wrapped in clear shrink wrap.



Inside the box, Tomboi is wrapped in black tissue paper. It comes with a storage pouch, which is packed underneath Tomboi.



I think the packaging is great. It's very attractive. It's also gender neutral. If you slipped off the paperboard sleeve, the box would be great to present as a gift. The box itself is very discreet, however the sleeve is not.

If you choose not to keep the packaging, it can be recycled.

The included storage pouch is great for holding Tomboi or anything else you'd like. It's made out of the same red material as the harness. The top has a black zipper on it. On the front is a small logo for SpareParts. The pouch is rectangular and measures about 10 x 6 inches. If you prefer not to use it to store Tomboi, it can be used to store toys, batteries, condoms, cosmetics, or any other little things. If you happen to get it dirty, it should be washable. I recommend turning it inside out, though, so the logo doesn't get messed up.
    • Good for storage
    • Minimal
    • Recyclable

Personal comments

When Tomboi became available to review, I decided I'd give it a try. I was interested in how a panty style harness would fit and work for me. In retrospect, I don't think I realized how masculine the harness looked until I actually went to wear it.

Despite the masculine look to Tomboi and the fact that I am not very masculine at all, the harness worked out well for me. My partner loved the look of it. I absolutely love the colors. They aren't feminine or masculine, but they do look pretty powerful together.

I felt much more comfortable during strap on play with this harness than I have with my leather ones. Leather harnesses are kind of bulky at times and having straps all over the place can be less than comfortable. Wearing something that fits like regular panties is much more comfortable. If not for the O-ring, I would have decided already to stop wearing leather harnesses and just wear this one. Unfortunately, the tiny O-ring doesn't really cut it. If I get a toy larger than what I have, I'll have to use a different harness.

I do wish that SpareParts would fix their sizing for this. How can a harness that is supposed to fit up to 37 inch hips do so if it only stretches up to 36 inches around? I can't recommend enough going up a size if you're not at the smaller end of the size chart for each size.
Follow-up commentary
I still really like this harness. Since I received it as an assignment I haven't really been using my other harnesses. They're just a bit too much of a hassle sometimes. I like using something easy to slide on and off and then wash. One of the biggest deal breakers with my leather harnesses is the fact that the material cannot be fully sanitized after use, which is important to me since we use harnesses specifically for anal play.

I plan on purchasing Sasha at some point, though I don't know if I will be reviewing it.
This product was provided free of charge to the reviewer. This review is in compliance with the FTC guidelines.

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Comments
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  • Contributor: SecretKinksters
    Very nice review!!
  • Contributor: bog
    Everything a review should be! Thank you!
  • Contributor: GingerSpice
    Thanks!!
  • Contributor: Mr. E
    Awesome job.
  • Contributor: TJtheMadHatter
    Great review! Thanks!
  • Contributor: FieryRed
    I read your review hoping for sizing info, and got even more than I expected! Thanks! One question though--when you say you have 35" hips, can you tell me where you're measuring? The normal location for a hip measurement is at "the fullest part of your hips", meaning, usually, the middle of your behind. However, their size chart says "lower waist/hips", which sounds like they want you to measure around the top of your hip bones. Help?
  • Contributor: FieryRed
    Oops, forgot to check the notify box...
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