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I will harness you, Randy!

Randy's nonporous, flexible and dense. He's very penis-like in appearance. He's squishy and smooth. And he's harness compatible.

He's a short and stubby dildo perfect for most size queens... provided they are flexible enough to find a good position. Turns out the extra inches on longer girthy dildos serves a purpose, after all. Even if it is only so that us inflexible folks can still enjoy them.
Published:
Pros:
Perfect size/shape, body safe.
Cons:
Difficult to hold onto, weak suction cup.
Rating by reviewer:
4
extremely useful review

Use

Randy's design, shape and size make him a very versatile toy. He's excellent for vaginal penetration, and the perfect size for the perfect stretch. His wide, concave base makes him great for anal penetration as well.

Use Randy solo or with a partner, but know that with a partner, he seems more suited for a harness, rather than in your partner's hand.

Anyone from beginners to experienced users, I'm sure, will enjoy Randy, so long as they like something with a good amount of girth. Petite toy enthusiasts need not apply.
    • Couple foreplay/after climax play
    • Long / extended session

Material / Texture

Randy's made of swirly purplish-blue silicone. His color changes hue depending on the light, which is really neat.

He's smooth and nonporous. Phthalates and latex free. He has no odor to speak of. And his surface isn't really all that tacky when compared to other toys I own, which means less sticks to him.

He's dense and flexible. And he's squishy! Oh so squishy.

Design / Shape / Size

This dildo's short and stubby. He's six and one-half inches long, with an insertable length of five and one-half inches, and six and three-quarters inches in circumference.

His shape is very penis-like, with his bulbous head, slight bulge behind the head, and vein-like line running up the underside to the base of the head. He curves up slightly starting about two inches from the base. And the base flares out into a slightly concave bottom that functions as a suction cup.

He's definitely not discreet, but he has no metal or moving parts, so he won't set off any alarms when you carry him in your luggage.

The only problem I have with his size is there's no extra room on Randy for hands, so he's not particularly easy to use in partner situations without a strap-on harness. But other than that, any size queen will find Randy an excellent addition to their toy box.

Performance

Randy does an excellent job of stimulating the g-spot, doesn't seem to block access to my clitoris with his base and stretches ever so nicely. But finding a good position - especially for someone as inflexible as me - posed a problem. I tried putting him on a chair, on the edge of the couch, suction cupping him to the wall... No dice. I eventually ended up sort of half-kneeling, half-sitting with Randy resting on my heel.

He's really difficult to hold onto because of how short, bendy and slippery he is. And he has a habit of getting hung up on my pubic bone if I try to use him laying back.

His suction cup isn't all that strong unless he's placed on a smooth flat surface like a table top or the floor. Unlike the Big Stuff, which stayed on my wall for over 48 hours with no adverse reaction to the toy or the wall, Randy fell off within minutes.

He is harness compatible, but we don't currently own a strap-on harness. But it's in the works, so watch for it in my follow-up if you're interested in how he performs.

Care and Maintenance

Because Randy's made of silicone, he's ridiculously easy to care for. Use lots of waterbased lube. Boil him for three minutes or throw him in the top drawer of your dishwasher. Wash him with antibacterial soap or a toy cleaner, or wipe him down with toy wipes. Be sure to wash him before and after use, and before sharing between orifices or partners. Then toss him in your toy drawer with the rest of your silicone toys.

Packaging

I'm kind of in love with Randy's packaging, though I'll probably eventually just put him in a ziplock to save on storage space. It's not particularly pretty, but it's functional. It stays closed no matter how hard you are on it.

Randy came in a clear plastic cylinder with red plastic well-fitting caps on both ends. It's only a couple inches longer than Randy and just slightly bigger around than his base, so he doesn't flop around inside. On the front is a generic black sticker with red lettering describing Vixen Creations toys and lifetime warranty. It's simple and, aside from being able to see the dildo through the plastic, unassuming.

Personal comments

I'm sure you're all wondering what Randy's like in comparison to the Large Big Stuff. Or maybe you're not. But I'm gonna tell you anyway.

First, Randy's circumference is a quarter inch smaller than the Big Stuff, and he's an inch shorter. He's also much squishier than the Big Stuff, which makes him easier to insert. Because of this, he also feels much smaller than the quarter inch difference.

I thought short and stubby was going to win it. But there's a problem with short and stubby. I have fat legs, and I'm probably the least flexible person alive. While Randy's concave bottom does serve as a suction cup, it doesn't hold as well as the Big Stuff. So it turns out long and fat is the better option for me. Or maybe I'm doing it wrong? More research is definitely needed.

However!

When I did manage to find a position I could use him in, I loved Randy and am not about to give up on him that easily. So I've talked M into purchasing a strap-on harness for guys. I think that's probably the best option. It's really awesome being married to someone who isn't threatened by my dildo addiction.
This product was provided free of charge to the reviewer. This review is in compliance with the FTC guidelines.
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Comments
  • oliverHyde
    oliverHyde  
    omgosh... wants!
    excellent review Smile
  • Sundae
    Sundae  
    Ahhh DO WANT. I totally didn't realise he had a suction cap, not sure why I never noticed that before. Though, it's a total pain that it's not very good at actually sticking anywhere. Definitely keen for him to be my first Vixen toy, thanks for the want-inspiring review!
  • Kayla
    Kayla  
    I'm scared of this and can't believe anyone could use it. Tongue out Great review.
  • NuMe
    NuMe  
    Very nice review!
  • TacoODoom
    TacoODoom  
    i'm sorry the suction cup on yours doesn't hold, mine works a little too well LOL
  • Sammi
    Sammi  
    I just got this one - he's so cute Smile
    Good review!
  • butterflygirlxo
    butterflygirlxo  
    great review hun! (:
  • MagicVibe
    MagicVibe  
    Nice review!
  • Antipova
    Antipova  
    Any new news on the harness?
  • Elnoa
    Elnoa  
    This is such a cutie. Thanks for the review!
  • permitdrab
    permitdrab  
    Thanks, another helpful review that confirms this toy has the girth I crave!
  • Bullfroggy and Rose
    Bullfroggy and Rose  
    thank you
  • comatose-kitty
    comatose-kitty  
    difficult to hold on to
  • sexystuffeve
    sexystuffeve  
    I love the color.
  • lovebites
    lovebites  
    thanks for the review!
  • Bi-Pedal Draon
    Bi-Pedal Draon  
    Thanks for another helpful review!
  • DemonSlayer
    DemonSlayer  
    Thank you for the review!
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