Blush UR3 ballsy dong - realistic dildo by Doc Johnson - review by Madeira

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Jello Shots (or not)

The Blush UR3 Ballsy, to me, useless as a sex toy, it's simply impossible for me to insert. It smells strongly, and is made of cheap porous material. Basically, it's got all the halmarks of a cheap poorly made toy... however I've had so much fun wearing it on my head and pretending to be an elephant I don't absolutely hate it.
Published:
Pros:
Pretty, cheap, entertaining.
Cons:
Unsafe material, too floppy to insert, smelly
Rating by reviewer:
2
extremely useful review

Use

This is a fairly large, somewhat floppy dick. Frankly, it's a little too floppy for hard thrusting. It does have a very nice skin like texture on the outside, but due to the lack of a firm core this feels more like a semi than a true hard on.

Frankly, I could not actually insert this toy. I'm not that tight, but it preferred to bend rather than go in. It's also quite heavy. Despite this toy's not being terribly insertable for something designed for insertion, it does have its uses. I've found that it's a very comfortable packer (though it does make you look HUNG, it makes a surprisingly good flogging toy, and if you wear it on your face like a nose, it makes a hilarious elephant costume. Though seriously, this is not a dildo... as stated I'm by no means virginal and I'm too tight to get this wiggly thing inside me.
    • Gag gift

Material / Texture

It's made out of UR3, which is very very soft, approximately the texture of jello. It's got an odd almost fruity smell (similar to a gummy bear) and the exterior texture is powdery and soft, almost velvety. It's a highly porous material and I would strongly advise you against inserting this without a condom. It's extremely floppy, and quite heavy.
    • Flexible
    • Porous
    • Strong odor

Design / Shape / Size

This is a large toy, 7 inches long and quite thick, this combine with it's floppiness made it impossible for me to actually insert. I once said I would never review a toy without using it, and well, I tried to use this toy, I really did, but not matter how much lube I used the shaft preferred to bend in the middle rather than go inside me. Were I able to insert the toy I imagine it would feel quite nice.

In any case, I digress, on to the design. It's translucent with a pink head. The balls are flat on the back, and not particularly detailed in their molding, all and all it's quite a pretty cock, and looks nice in the packaging. However, I do wish they'd thought about the issue of trying to insert something so floppy.

Performance

Again, I cannot get this toy inside myself. My girlfriend cannot get it inside herself. It is compatible with O ring harnesses, and makes a decent packer, but as a SEX toy (as in a toy used for sex) I'm pretty convinced this is useless. If you swing it correctly it makes a very nice thuddy impact play flogger, but that's about it. It's simply (for me, perhaps girls with wider vaginas might have better luck) unusable as a sex toy.

Care and Maintenance

This toy is only compatible with water based lubes, and you should really not use it without a condom. You can wash it under warm (not hot) water without soap as soap can degrade the material, it also needs to be dusted with corn starch before storage. Generally, like most toys made of skin like materials, it's a bit of a "diva" in terms of care. It should also generally be stored on its own, in a baggie.
    • High maintenance
Follow-up commentary
I still don't love this cock, but with my girlfriend, a strap on harness, and a loooot of lube, we did finally manage to get this inside me and have some sex... that said, it's still too wiggly for hard thrusting, and the fact that it has to be used with a condom somewhat ruins the enjoyment of the skin like texture. However, adding to it's delightful hilarity we christened it Aldus Snow (after the fictional rockstar) because it's big (like a rockstar's, theoretically) and floppy (like a heroin addict's)
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Comments
  • A.S.
    A.S.  
    Very useful review
  • Sera26
    Sera26  
    great review
  • Puss in Boots
    Puss in Boots  
    thanks
  • Fawkes
    Fawkes  
    "wearing it as an elephant" nice
  • mailroomorder
    mailroomorder  
    Thanks for the review!
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