Blue balls? I don't think so!!

I love this vibrator because of it's many functions and it's great quality. It is a great addition to my toy box and I love the strength of it's vibrations. When I was first looking at the Softee online I thought I would hate it, but it has quickly become one of my favorite vibrators.
Published:
Pros
Seven speeds and functions, Pretty color, Great texture.
Cons
Not waterproof, Battery Guzzler, Not Clit Stimulating
Rating by reviewer:
4
extremely useful review

Use

This vibrator works well for inner vaginal stimulation, harness use and anal play. I wouldn't use this product for simple clit stimulation unless you simply want to use the head, because when inserted the base of the toy stays stationary and doesn't vibrate. This toy is great for people who have mixed feelings about life-like vibrators, because although the cock itself is lifelike with veins and balls, the color adds some whimsy and a touch a cuteness.

This is a great toy for people who crave intense and heavy vibrations, and with seven settings the Softee can change from pulsating, steady, soft, or hard. If you don't love hard inner-vaginal vibrations this toy won't work out! Personally, I came from the Softee's vibrations and I am generally a person who requires clit play to orgasm. This toy is great for solo use, partner use and fits into an O ring harness. I haven't used it in a harness yet, but the base looks perfect for it.
  • Who / How / What
    [ ? ]
    Who might this product be best for? How is it best used? What are the best circumstances or situations for using this product?
    • Couples
    • Gender play
    • Solo
  • Where
    [ ? ]
    Where / what types of places can this product be used?
    • Not to be used in or near water

Material / Texture

The material is listed as Sil-a-gel, which is a soft bendable plastic that heats up easily. Both Sil-a-gel and PVC are hypoallergenic plastics which is good for people who are allergic to certain rubbers. This cock can be bent but stays in an upright position, unlike jelly toys which flop around. The toy came with a "new toy smell" but after one good washing he didn't smell like anything at all.

Softee's texture is soft and slightly velvety. Because he is so soft I am worried about getting nicks or tears in his material, but I have only found slight scratches so far. I haven't used this vibrator in a harness but I feel that the wear and tear of harness use might get to him. I will be sure to post a follow up review after I use him for strap-on sex!
    • Flexible
    • No odor
    • Somewhat porous

Design / Shape / Size

The Softee is an amazingly lifelike circumcised penis. I personally don't like lifelike vibrators, but he is the perfect compromise because his blue color adds a whimsical quality that I love in my toys. He is a soft blue color that is great for those of us who are bored from having a huge quantity of pink toys!

He sticks out perfectly straight and doesn't list down or to the side. He has symmetrical veins running down his shaft that stop at the base. His balls are thick and aren't hollow like some types of harness cocks which makes him able to stand up straight while strapped in.

His base is flat enough so that he can be set upright on a table. His insertable length is five inches and his actual length is six inches. His circumference is four inches at his base. This same vibrator is available in six, seven, and eight inch sizes, but I am absolutely satisfied with the six inch version. His girth is large enough and fits well with his length. For me, his proportions seem perfect. I am not especially fond of large toys and the six inch size adds the realistic quality of the Softee.

This toy is perfect for providing an unintimidating semi-lifelike addition to the bedroom. It is not as whimsical or "toylike" as some other vibrators which can make their use of closer to having sex with a man than sex with an object.

    • Beginner-ish
    • Realistic
    • Whimsical / artistic

Functions / Performance / Controls

This vibrator has seven speeds and functions! The Softee has two buttons. One is an "on and off" switch, while the other takes the user through the varying speeds and pulsations the Softee has.

This first function of the Softee is a steady medium vibration that vibrated the cock about as hard as an electric toothbrush.

The second, third, and fourth functions are a variation of the first with increasing force. The fifth function stops the "steady" buzzing vibrations and offers a harder "rumbling" vibration. Personally, I have ever experienced "buzzing" and "rumbling" in one toy and I am now a big fan.

The sixth function is a vibration that starts slow and increases in strength. This takes about four seconds and it works the best when I am just about to orgasm. This change in pace pushes me over the edge.

The seventh speed is a simple, quick pulsating vibration which is hard and to the point.

The Softee's vibrations are all located at the tip of the cock. If you are all for clitoral stimulation you should know this toy doesn't provide much clit stimulation. You can use the tip to tease and play with your clit, but the base of the toys vibrations are nowhere as powerful as the head. So, internal use of this toy doesn't allow for much pleasure on the clitoris. A good thing about the Softee is that you can use it in conjunction with other toys, and if you feel that you need extra clit action I would suggest buying a vibrating penis ring to use with the Softee.

The Softee's hard vibrations utilize a lot of battery power so be sure to invest in some extra AAA Battery's if you are buying this toy!

This toy is not waterproof, which I find a bit disappointing. I love sexy baths and showers! But he does function well as a discrete toy. His vibrations are on the same level as a vibrating toothbrush, which is a bit noisier than a cell phone's vibrations, but are still hard to hear behind a closed door.

The remote that came with Softee is my favorite remote out of all my vibrators. It is soft and velvety plastic. The controls are easy to use and the battery hatch is securely fastened!

The only drawback I could find to the design of Softee was his battery guzzling ways. This vibrator should have been build with a larger remote allowing for bigger batteries because those 3 AAA Battery's just aren't holding up!
    • Discreet sound
    • Lots of variety in function
    • Strong patterns

Care and Maintenance

The logo Doc Martin is inscribed at his base which makes him a little more difficult to clean than he would be otherwise.

This toy shouldn't be shared between non fluid bonded couples and if you are sharing toys make sure to put a condom on Softee!

I wouldn't use silicone lube for the toy and I find it works best with a slick water based lube.
You can clean this toy with soap and water or you can invest in a toy cleaner which makes cleaning your toys a lot easier and less time consuming. Don't forget that Softee isn't waterproof and use care when you wash him in your sink! His ridges and inscriptions could make cleaning more difficult than normal smooth dongs, so I make sure to take time to clean him.

Softee can be stored with clothing and other toys as his material and texture doesn't allow him to accumulate a lot of lint or dirt. I store mine in a dark, clean, and dry place, but I know a lot of people will be happy to know that he can nestle in amongst clothing without being damaged.
    • Easy to clean

Packaging

This packaging is super cute with swirls and flowers. It is a bit on the girly side and this product seems directly aimed towards women. The packaging is loud and proud about this toy's creation in the United States and gives a great deal more health information than other toys I have received. The packaging is not suitable for a storage box.

This packaging is not at all discrete, but all Eden toys come in an unmarked cardboard box from "Web Merchants" so I don't have to worry about my roommates or my mailmen knowing about my love of sex toys.

Doc Martin products in general seem to have professional packaging and if you can't find out details about the Softee from it's packaging I encourage you to check out the Doc Johnson website has or simply ask me on the comments below!

Personal comments

I like the Softee a lot more than I thought I would. I generally shy away from life-like toys because I am a lesbian and penises in general hold very little appeal, but I must say the Softee is a great penis! When I was first assigned this toy I thought it looked like something I would review and probably dislike, but I think it is now a staple to my toy box and I can't wait to try it as a strap on.
Follow-up commentary
I have noticed with more use the vibrator starts to wear. This wear causes the vibrator to be covered in lint.
This product was provided free of charge to the reviewer. This review is in compliance with the FTC guidelines.

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This review was edited by
  • Pixel Contributor: Pixel
  • Rank:
    6 / 10
  • Edited reviews: 187
Comments
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  • Contributor: Pixel
    Wow, awesome and thoroughly thorough review! I really like the colour of this toy, but Sil-a-gel makes me nervous.
  • Contributor: - Kira -
    Wow, you did an awesome job with this!!

    I agree with Pixel - the color is nice, but no Sil-a-gel for me either.
  • Contributor: Silverdrop
    Same here. That blue is great, but I had a Sil-a-gel review dildo that smelled so bad I wouldn't put it anywhere near my lady parts. I'm guessing you didn't have that problem, since you didn't mention anything about smell?
  • Contributor: Lucky21
    Thanks for an awesome review!!!
  • Contributor: Katelyn
    After my first toy clean the Softee smelled fine, but I haven't owned him for too long so I will keep an eye (or nose) out for smells to post in a follow up : )
  • Contributor: Kitka
    Great review! I was assigned the same thing but the 8" version, which I'm still waiting on to get here. I hope it's not smelly!
  • Contributor: Katelyn
    I hope you have fun with it! Mine was a battery hog and I am wondering if other people have this same problem so I will look for your review : )
  • Contributor: Nazaress
    Thanks for the review! It's excellent!
  • Contributor: Cookie Monster Mike
    Wow this is an incredible review, I can't believe I haven't read it till now. I especially love your video review as well. Very thorough, choice of words and describing the product is really great. Thanks for putting this one up it was very enjoyable to read
  • Contributor: Madsinner
    Wow, that video was priceless.
  • Contributor: Sally Forth
    Wow! I didn't know this came in a vibrator version. I'm glad I caught your review before I bought the dildo. Thanks for the review and video!
  • Contributor: CRAZYSEXYONE
    great review
  • Contributor: Katelyn
    Thanks for the comments ya'll.
  • Contributor: luisss
    gf would love this ty
  • Contributor: Katelyn
    It is still on Eden! I was concerned that this line was being discontinued on and off.
  • Contributor: Terri69
    Thanks for the great review!
  • Contributor: Tbanda
    Thank you!
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