Pleasure penis waterproof - g-spot vibrator by Cal Exotics - review by Jewelweed

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BIG Disappointment.

Looks nice, but didn't do a thing for me. Overall, it's a cheaply-made, poorly-functional toy. Better as a dildo than a vibrator, only after you cut off all of those obnoxious "pleasure" bumps and nubs.
Published:
Pros:
Nice girth, attractive appearance.
Cons:
Uncomfortable "pleasure" nubs/teeth, debatably-unsafe material, very cheaply made, poor vibrations.
Rating by reviewer:
1
extremely useful review
This is a toy I bought quite a while ago, yet only used a few times.

On first impression, it's kind of pretty, with a deep blue shaft and ruby red tip. The texture was nice (though now I prefer to use phthalate-free for health reasons but it had the stereotypical "jelly rubber" (I believe this specific toy|Pleasure penis waterproof is made from Crystalessence material) scent. Oh, and did I mention, this toy is BIG. Don't get me wrong, I can handle something this size, but jelly rubber has an uncomfortable way of sticking to your privates when being inserted, unless you are using a lot of lube. The size of this toy only exacerbates this issue. Even with a lot of water-based lube, it was hard to maneuver it.

Enough of the surface details though, and let me tell you why this ended up plunging deep... into my trash can after a few tries.

First of all, the "pleasure" nubs and TEETH. Not good. There are little tiny stabby things just beneath the glans, and I'll tell you-not comfortable at all. I tried cutting them off, but then there's also the matter of the bumps on the other side--whose only purpose as I can see is to make insertion more difficult. Once I had it properly lubed and in, they still weren't doing anything that I would call "pleasurable."

Next, the vibration. HA. A big, thick, jelly vibrator... with a bullet inside. The bullet might work, but I think the material definitely puts a damper on the vibration. I could barely feel it. This toy would be more appropriately used as a dildo than a vibrator.

Which brings me to this point: I dropped it, from my bed to the tile floor. On next inspection, the bullet is cracked! What a ripoff. Before the bullet broke, I was tempted to cut open the shaft and just salvage the bullet for vibratory fun, but that hope was smashed along with the bullet on the floor :(
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Comments
  • Yojimbo42
    Sorry you had so much difficulty with this one, I share you opinion of those weird...teeth/nub things...not sure what the person was thinking when they designed this one...
  • Cock Wrangler
    Ouch. Looking at that up close makes me think it'd be useful as a torture toy more than anything else.
  • Epiphora
    I bet some dude somewhere came up with this design. "It's pleasurable, right!?!" No.
  • Nashville
    I recommend wearing a condom over this.. it might help make the texture feel less..er... scary. "teeth" just paints a picture of pain!
  • SadoMas
    Thanks for the review.
  • schadenfreude
    Ah hahahahahahaha. Just found one of these in my friend's closet while helping her move stuff. She said she hated it too. I knew we'd be able to look it up here to make sure it wasn't just her.
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