Tuyo - discreet massager discontinued by Big Teaze Toys - review by Spiking Glue

The orb looked so attractive...it looked cute and sexy. I knew this it wasn’t quite what I was looking for – but I liked looking at it. Yeah, looks matter to me. I like pretty things. And, I think I was also searching for an excuse to buy it, just so I could own something pretty and cute (as if that wasn’t a good enough reason!).

And then, one day, I was daydreaming of an upcoming vacation. I began to think of sore muscles and long flights, and wondered how I could sneak toys into my luggage, when it hit me. I felt brilliant. Granted, it was a simple idea, but I’ll let myself feel brilliant where I can...

I could get a Tuyo, after all it’s the “Vibromasseur”, right? Its perfectly innocent shape could easily pass through security, and on the jets I could help cure restless legs with it and no one would bat an eye... alright, they might bat an eye, but they could only speculate the naughty nature of the spherical massager|Tuyo. Safely at my hotel, it could double up by helping me masturbate.

Satisfied that my reason was perfectly logical, I bought my Tuyo.

When it arrived, it was as cute and sexy as it was in pictures. It has its own little box, and a bed of satin. I kept the box, it’s far too heavy duty to toss. It helps keep the Vibromasseur in place, yes, but without it the Tuyo will not roll away. The button on top is a little flat, so it will rarely roll away from you so long as you set it carefully.

The batteries are notoriously tricky to insert, and I had to take a minute or two to figure out it. It isn’t so much that it’s hard to turn, for me, it’s more that it turns so subtly on its track that it feels like it has not moved at all, and so you twist at it and twist at it like a stubborn pickle jar. In reality, it doesn’t thread on like most vibrators, it’s got a little quarter-turn lock, so it doesn’t need to travel very far at all before the top lifts away.

I inserted the batteries and fired it up. The noise it kicked out surprised me, I hadn’t been expecting it to be quite so loud. I had the vague impression that it was actually echoing on my bedroom walls. It could easily be heard from the hallway outside my bedroom without background noise or a thick blanket. Luckily, I was home alone, so I applied it to my then-sore legs, and then on my crotch through my jeans. Impressive! But not great. Comfortably strong. I like the frequency it uses, it has just enough depth and energy. I knew I could get off with it if I felt like it.

The patterns are fun, too. My favorite is ‘heartbeat’, because I can easily differentiate the rhythm, and it is also the quietest setting next to ‘low’.

While the toy is splash-proof, I have never put it in contact with water. Since I primarily use my Tuyo as a body massager (with optional happy-ending), I mostly use jojoba oil with it. So I generally only use toy cleaner on it. However, if I ever discontinued that practice, soap and water wouldn’t hurt it at all.

Holding the Tuyo is more comfortable than I thought it’d be, I’d say that it is reasonably ergonomic. The Tuyo is on the lighter side, so your wrists and hands will not fatigue too quickly during use. Its round shape is perfectly hand-size for me. The vibrations actually feel quite nice on my hands, as I tend to hold my tension there.

I like my Tuyo, but it’s not my favorite toy. It’s a good multitasker. It provides me with a comfortable body massage in the places it can reach – I wish I were more flexible! It can also be quite fun at sexy-time, too, because the vibrations are quite enthusiastic. It’s also really impressively good on batteries, I’ve owned the Tuyo for three months now, and it’s batteries are still good.

My typical Tuyo session goes as follows: I drip a little jojoba oil|Good clean love on my tired legs and rub briskly so that my skin becomes a little warm from friction. I then rub the Tuyo back and forth, in a long deep stroke up and down my legs, allowing the jojoba oil to slowly absorb into my skin. I rub them all over, slow and hard, while watching TV. I rub jojoba oil on my feet and press the Tuyo deeply into my arch, into the curve at my toes. I go very slowly and use great pressure, and I don’t stop until the oil is totally absorbed into my skin. This usually takes about 20 minutes.

Then, I do the other side. Afterward, my feet and legs are both buzzy and relaxed. And then repeat the same process on my arms.

And then I roll back and feel relaxed.

If I feel like it, I rest it on my mons and just roll it about, without adding any oil or lube. While I *have* finished off using it, I rarely do. It just doesn’t do it for me, not usually. It’s a good, diffuse vibe, and diffuse isn’t typically my thing. However, it does heat me up and relax me, and make me feel good and sensual and glowy.

My Optional Happy-Ending: Grab dildo, fuck myself, and fall asleep. *laugh* By now, I'm ready for it.