Sqweel oral sex simulator - clitoral stimulator by LoveHoney - review by Sam (aka Jul!a)

The Sqweel is an innovative oral sex simulator. Aside from the noise of the motor and the fact that the lube and tongues may be cold, it actually does an admirable job of simulating oral pleasure. Anybody who enjoys tongues lapping against them would probably enjoy this as well. You don't even have to limit use to just the clitoris or vagina; use it to rim the anus, tease the testicles, or nip at the nipples.

There are two materials that you're going to run into on the Sqweel: plastic and TPR. The outer housing and inner core of the Sqweeler are plastic. The outer case is hard, matte, and has a distinct "new toy" smell to it. Over time it should dissipate if left out to air out.

The tongues on the Sqweeler are TPR. They're stretchy, flexible, and fairly soft. There's not a ton of drag to them, but lube is still strongly advised. At first it smelled like the plastic housing, but it will also pick up other scents, like that of your lube or soap if you use something that's strongly scented. On the middle of each tongue, there's also a visible seam. Nothing that can be felt, but they may look a bit scary at first.

Overall the Sqweel is fairly bulky looking. It's still relatively easy to hold and maneuver with one hand, even with smaller hands, but if you have very petite hands you'll probably want to use both.

All closed up it's just over 4 1/2" in length and about 4" wide. If you remove the cover that keeps the tongues hidden away, it loses almost 1/2" in length, but appears a whole lot less bulky. The end with the power switch is smaller than the end with the wheel, coming in at about 2 3/4" across. Either way it's still about 1 1/2" thick.

The Sqweeler than you get is the one with the 10 tongues. Each tongue is curved slightly and about 3/4" tall. The wheel attaches to the inside of the Sqweel in an "insert tab A into slot B" kind of way. You'll know it's on securely when you hear a little click as the plus sign inside the wheel lines up with the plus sign that extends out of the Sqweel.

There's no real way to pass this off as something else; but, with the cover on, it isn't immediately obvious as to what it is. Either way, I'd recommend keeping it hidden away from prying eyes that you don't want to explain anything to.

The Sqweel runs on 3 AAA batteries that aren't provided. They go easily into the battery compartment towards the bottom of the toy, and then you can move the switch at the bottom from off to low to medium to high. As you cycle through the speeds, the tongues move faster and get progressively louder. The noise to me is very similar to that of a remote control car. If you can keep the blankets down you can trap the noise for the most part. Definitely keep your door shut and turn up some music or the TV if you're not using a blanket.

You are definitely going to want lube with this, even if you naturally produce a lot of your own. If you're naturally lubed up, you won't need as much. The easiest way I've found to lube the Sqweel up is to turn it on low and start dripping your lube in on the tongues. A few squirts should do. Then you're ready to start playing. You really can use this anywhere you'd like tongues to be; it really does do a pretty good job of mimicking oral sex. You can turn the Sqweel any which way you want to change the angle you're being licked from and get creative and adventurous with tongues that won't tell you no. Unless you put too much pressure on them, then you may be able to stop the motor. But I've found that, unless I was purposefully trying to stop the wheel from spinning, it didn't stop when I didn't want it to.

Should you wish to swap out the included Sqweeler for another at any point, simply press your thumbs into the grooves on the front plate of the Sqweel and twist in a clockwise direction. That plate will now pop off and allow you to swap the tongue Sqweeler for any other Sqweeler, or let you clean it.

While cleaning you'll need to keep in mind that the Sqweel isn't waterproof. The parts that come off can be washed on their own in warm soapy water, but the main housing of the Sqweel should be cared for carefully. I ended up taking a damp soapy cloth to the inside to clean out the lube, and then towel dried it as well as I could and let it finish air drying. Be very careful not to get anything near the controls or the battery compartment. The cover that pops off and the Sqweelers can be fully submerged and towel dried. The Sqweeler also doesn't pick up much lint either, which is nice. If you used a silicone based lube, clean up will probably take you a little longer, but water based lubes should clean up fairly easily. The box recommends only water based lubes.

When you're all done, you can either store it in the tin it came in or in a drawer since there's an extra cover that pops on to the open end to keep the Sqweel free of dust.

At first glance, you'll be greeted with the cardboard sleeve that covers the tin that actually holds the Sqweel. The sleeve is in your face and definitely not discreet. The front has a photo of the Sqweel with the caption "a revolution in orgasms" and the back has some more information on it. It tells you that you need 3 AAA batteries and to use with water based lubes. It also says that it's quiet, easy to use, is latex and phthalate free and also lists the website and their Facebook page.

The top of the tin says "Sqweel" and has a stylized imprint of the ten tongue Sqweeler. Open that and you'll see the Sqweel resting in a plastic tray covered in what feels like velvet flocking. Underneath the Sqweel is an instruction manual that really does give you an easy step by step how to that anybody with no Sqweel experience should be able to follow. The tin can easily be used as storage or even as a gift to somebody you know would like a Sqweel.

The Sqweel was one of those things that I saw and knew right away that I wanted to try, but wasn't sure how long it would take me to get around to it. When I got the opportunity to do the DR, I jumped at it. The Sqweel really is unique and innovative. It costs $100 less than Sasi and seems to do the job better. Sure, it's not waterproof, is a bit loud, and doesn't learn what you like, but it's quieter than some of my other vibrators. It's so simple, it's hard to not get results. I found that, aside from the fact that it couldn't change settings on its own and was a bit cold, it really felt a lot like my husband's tongue; only, rather than slow tentative licks, you get more of the quick darting licks. Overall, the only real down sides that I can find are that it's somewhat loud and a pain to clean. I mean, sure, the product page says that it can be rinsed under the tap, but I'm a bit paranoid and I'd rather not chance it since I do actually like this one a lot.