The Almighty Heal Potion of Vroom

Lost some hit points? You need some Life! Unfortunately this isn't a cheap restorative device... you'll be shelling out more than a few pieces of gold to get your Life on.
Published:
Pros
Pinpoint vibration, rechargeable, green silicone, need I say more?
Cons
Painfully pricy, charge doesn't last all that long.
Rating by reviewer:
5
extremely useful review

Use

Use Life to cast a restorative spell, Cure Horny Adult. Cures 2d8 +1/level horniness to a max +10. This equip is best used by a female Cleric of the Erotic or perhaps a druid in pussy form with the whole nature motif going on. It cannot be equipped by Luscious Barbarians who will find its lack of vibrational qualities to not be up to their raging standards, they should instead equip a Hitachi Magic Wand.

With the small, hand-held, personal design of Life it's strictly a clitoral vibrator. The pinpoint blade of the leaf is perfectly designed to deliver very pointed vibrations to the clit. That's basically about it. I suppose you could stimulate nipples with it but why would you even bother if you have a perfectly good clit hanging around?

Because it's fairly small it would work well for couples as well, as it won't get in the way of anything else going on... say cocks, strap-ons, hands, whatever. You'll still have to hold it in place, but it's a great personal pleasure device that's not going to come off as intimidating to a partner who's not up on the sex toy culture thing.

Life is also waterproof so you can feel free to bring this device on your underwater adventures as well. And it locks, just in case you're worried about that one touch button.
  • Who / How / What
    [ ? ]
    Who might this product be best for? How is it best used? What are the best circumstances or situations for using this product?
    • Couples
    • Group situations
    • Solo
  • Where
    [ ? ]
    Where / what types of places can this product be used?
    • Anywhere
    • Campus/roommate living
    • Tub/shower/pool
  • Features
    [ ? ]
    What kind of features does this product offer?
    • Travel friendly
  • Body / part areas
    [ ? ]
    What areas on the body can this product be used / what areas does it stimulate best?
    • Clitoris
    • Nipples

Material / Texture

Life is made out of the trapped souls of water willow dryads wait NO I mean, it's made out of medical grade silicone, and is totally body safe. It's not silicone lube safe, as this will cast the debuff MELTING on your toy, and probably permanently damage it.

When I first unpackaged it, it had a bit of a smell that disappeared after washing and use. It wasn't a bad smell, just sort of a smell that left me aware it had come out of a factory and not out of a tree.

While it's entirely smooth, I found that after a while of use the skin got a little loose, and you can feel this. The tip of the toy is flexible, but the rest of it contains the mechanics and is completely firm.

It does have some raised lettering around the charging port but this isn't the part of the toy that will be touching your body and I'll be honest, even if it's not pretty, I haven't really noticed it at all in use.
    • Not porous at all
    • Smooth

Design / Shape / Size

So yeah, it looks like a leaf. I guess it's discreet if you're the sort of person who collects artistic nature things but eventually that snoopy drunk friend is going to pick it up and push the button and start screaming about your possessed nature motifs and then call the church elders when they're sober and the whole town will come down on you, so do yourself a favor and tuck the vibrators away unless you're really certain about the whole thing.

Still, if you're going to travel with a toy it may as well be this one. It's non-threatening and doesn't even really look like a sex toy unless someone judges the fact that it's small enough to fit in your hand and has a button that engages the vibration mode as, well, sex toy. But at a glance you could pass it off, and it locks for travel.

The vibrations are concentrated in the pointiest end, and while you could theoretically use the side or flip it over to change the way the vibrations hit your clit, this is the toy of toys to get if you love pinpoint vibration and there's a myriad of other options if you don't. It's around three, three and a half inches long and precisely the size to fit in your palm or between a couple of fingers.

It's no good for inserting, so don't even try casting STIMULATE G-SPOT with this one. I mean, it is waterproof and body-safe so you could theoretically jam it into an orifice but I wouldn't recommend it, you'd have a hell of a time getting it out. Especially out of your anus. So please, please don't do this. If you want pointy stimulation as well as insertability, there's Bloom as another option in the Leaf line.
    • Discreet look/design
    • Futuristic
    • Whimsical / artistic

Functions / Performance / Controls

Leaf has a one touch button function. You push it and hold it down until it reaches the desired level of vibrational frequency. You push it again to turn it off. This means it can be very quickly turned off in use, whether for better or for worse. Sometimes it's annoying, when you try holding it down a second time to rev it up even more and it just turns off, for example. But I've grown to love it. It's easy to use and what I'd consider to be intuitive. The button also lights up when you click it which is a purposeless feature to me because I can't see it when it's under my covers, but I suppose if you couldn't feel the vibrations it's a visual cue that it's on.

It has no patterns, only a steady vibration mode. I don't really care, but this could be a dealbreaker because it's a pretty expensive toy to just vibrate. Because of the way you just hold the button down to increase the speed, it can't really be called a 10-speed toy... it has as much or as little vroom as you want it to have. At least until you hit the end of the cycle, which is sometimes frustratingly not quite enough. While the pin-point vibrations are focused and incredible, sometimes I want a deeper sensation, or a more filling sensation, or something other than a toy that's just beating my clit into submission. Certainly it's more powerful than Lelo's offerings, but I just wish it went that little bit further. But compared to other rechargeable offerings, the only stronger toy I've encountered has been Salsa (and presumably also Tango). Now if I could put Salsa's motor into the Leaf we'd be golden.

It's completely waterproof and survived being chucked underwater and being left on.

When it comes to the noise factor, Leaf has made a nice and quiet toy. It doesn't bother me from under the covers, and certainly you won't be hearing it outside of the room.

There is one little thing, though. The charge. While it doesn't take too long to charge, I've managed to burn out my Life in one or two uses. On high, it lasts somewhere in the range of 45 minutes, which is not a lot of time when you're really into it. While yeah, I can get off faster than that or on lower than high, it can be really annoying when you can feel it burning out, slowly getting slower and slower until it just stops next time you hit the button.

Life lives on the charger, pretty much.

On the note of the charger, you may notice that it's mildly terrifying to plunge the incredibly long shaft of the charger into the toy's port. It feels like it's breaking critical internal pieces at first. Don't be alarmed, I believe this is related to the waterproof qualities. It'll get easier to stick the charging cord end in with due time, the first few times it's just a little tight.

When Life is charging a red light comes on near the charging port. This will go out once it's done charging to let you know that it's ready to go.

The charger, for your convenience, happens to have the text "Leaf by Swan" on it, which could be a giveaway to anyone who's savvy about sex toys that it's not a phone charger, but it also means you'll never get confused with your twenty-seven toy chargers again, woo!
    • Discreet sound
    • Not enough variety
    • Rechargeable

Care and Maintenance

Leaf is basically as low-maintenance as you're going to get. It can be chucked into the sink and washed with soap and water for cleaning and it has no tricky bits to clean. You can use toy wipes if you'd prefer. The only special maintenance is the fact that silicone lube is a no-go, so you'll have to stick with water-based lubricants.

Storage is easy enough. It can be locked by holding down the button until it flashes red (and unlocked the same way), and it comes with a canvas-type bag with the Leaf logo on it for storage that'll fit Life as well as its charger, though frankly as it lives on my charger the charger rarely comes out of the wall.

The box is also very nice and swanky, but as soon as I saw it I knew that box was going to be painted up and used for normal storage purposes. Unfortunately the box does have a few giveaways that it once contained a vibrator so I've since painted it yellow. It's a very nice box and it will never hold vibrators again.

Silicones can fight with each other, so I highly recommend using the included bag for storage if you've got a multi-toy chest.
    • Easy to clean
    • Easy to store

Packaging

Leaf has very snazzy packaging. I mentioned the box earlier. It's made out of a natural cardboard paper with a magnetic latch and is just the perfect size to use as a jewelry box. I immediately repurposed it by painting it yellow to use as a gift box, because unfortunately it's extremely informative and while one would have to read closely to tell it's a vibrator rather than some kind of eco-friendly product, if someone does read that closely they will be able to find out that it's a sex toy.

There is a picture of the toy on the outside as well as information regarding the contents. There are no naked ladies and it's all very classy. If you're the kind of person who gives sex toys as gifts, the packaging is gorgeous and well suited to the eco-friendly theme of the Leaf brand.

It also comes with a canvas bag that can fit the charger and toy. If you don't use the box for storage, you can use the bag. But I wouldn't throw away such a perfectly nice reusable box, and I think that's the point... while on one hand it seems wasteful to have all this packaging for a 'green' brand, on the other hand it does encourage reuse and recycling. You're not going to just chuck this packaging, at least if you've got the green concept down.
    • Good for storage
    • Very informative
    • Would make a nice gift

Personal comments

Life just takes the cake, I can never not get off with it. It would seem that it would be a highly recommended toy from me. The vibrations are a good balance between buzzy and rumbly, that doesn't numb my fingers, that's strong enough for me. I love pinpoint, and being able to find just the right spot makes all the difference.

But the Leaf brand is murderously expensive. I hate recommending it so highly knowing that my next words would include "wait for a sale or use a coupon or use your Eden Points or something."

Are decently strong pinpoint vibrations and rechargability and lime green enough to offset no patterns, a low battery life and the incredibly high price tag? I knew I preferred very targeted vibrations and so for me, it would be. Fortunately, I was right. For some people the Leaf brand just isn't going to be quite perfect. I know I'd been incredibly excited about it... but there's some things that are ultimately a letdown. I'm giving it five stars because I think it's a great toy, but it's a great toy at a price I'd say is about fifty dollars too high.

If strong and rumbly is all you want, there's cheaper toys that have patterns, that are rechargeable.

But I admit it. I have a green sex toy fetish. I understand if all you can say right now is "butbutbut IT'S GREEN." If knowing you've got a fucking GREEN SILICONE VIBRATOR is going to make you beam from ear to ear, by all means... level up and get your Life on. I mean, there's always Eden points, right? And it's not a bad toy. My clit loves it and I'm willing to bet that most people will find some enjoyment out of the pinpoint stimulation Life provides, if only for the change of pace from using a finger-numbing bullet.
This product was provided at a discounted price in exchange for an unbiased review. This review is in compliance with the FTC guidelines.

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Comments
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  • Contributor: Martiniman
    Great review, thanks.
  • Contributor: ashboo32
    thanks
  • Contributor: KinkyKatieJames
    Thank you!
  • Contributor: steelaster
    great review! I love how you love that it's green!
  • Contributor: eri86
    Thanks for taking the time to share.
  • Contributor: chicmichiw
    Loved your creative review!
  • Contributor: karenm
    Great review, thanks!
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